AIBU to think you need money to be an ethical rainbow mum?

[RhubarbJuice]

So I go to a baby group, and there's a group of mums there, all very nice, but all quite similar in that they dress their children in organic clothes, the mums themselves often match in the adult versions, they have special reusable lunch boxes and coffee cups and all sorts. They are all very zero waste and anti plastic, which I agree with, we should all do our bit. One of them recommended these hair conditioning cubes which are zero plastic and good for your hair. I went online to look, the guts of £12 they cost! I have very thick hair so lucky to get a few weeks out of them

It's the same with the toys, they're very into their wooden toys, and as the babies were approaching their first birthdays, the conversation came up, and they're all spending hundreds on ethically made blocks and wooden rainbows. They worship this rainbow. One of them brought one to the group, and all the babies did love it.

AIBU to feel it's a shame its so expensive to do this kind of thing? I'd love to be able to afford all this stuff and go organic and plastic free, but it would cost me a fortune. Guess I'll have to stick with tupperware and second hand clothes for my DC!

I do draw the line at some of the clothes though, one mum was in a matching rainbow mushroom dress as her daughter.

Wooden toys seem expensive but retain their value. You can resell them for up to 90% of their original price. The same goes for the Scandi clothes, the resale value will be higher. TK Maxx sometimes has some of the ethical clothes and wooden or recycled plastic toys for reasonable prices. And reusable bottles etc are cheaper in the long run because you’re not buying drinks!

Sounds like this little group are buying into eco friendly stuff and bonding over it. No harm in that per se. I never bought a Grimms rainbow for my kids but I bought one for myself 🌈

I know lots of eco mums (dont know about the rainbow bit). Most of them come from fairly poor to average national wage households. You dont need money to act conscientiously.

I started a thread yesterday about eco products costing more. I think they should be subsidised. A lot of people will keep buying plastic because it's much cheaper and does the job.

I guess I'm one of those wooden block, rainbow obsessing mums lol , it stops at the organic clothing though, I do search for the scandi wooden toys second hand first before purchasing (I search for most things second hand tbh) but they aren't any cheaper, and luckily we get a discount at a shop that makes handmade wooden toys as my son is a brand rep

DS1, back in the day, discovered that wooden toys make great crayons for drawing on walls with.

Hey, OP, are we talking first babies here, as in these are first time mothers? I think this kind of unintentional posturing is endemic in the groups frequented by the mums of baby #1. Once #2 comes along (very un-eco...) nobody gives a shit about virtue signalling in this way, and you either just are / embody 'eco-mum' in the truest sense or the false pretences fall by the way side.
Eco parenting is cheap as chips as you are essentially aiming to consume less, not gather and parade paraphernalia.

I don't know, we're on #3 here 😂🙈

You already have a reusable lunch box with your Tupperware so YABU. It does cost more to have the ‘fashion item’ with green credentials but you don’t have to keep up with the Jones.

How much for a rainbow toy?!!!!

Completely childless but fascinating! Just googled Grimms - some of the natural wooden things would make lovely ornaments.

Someone pointed out on another thread that you don't have to buy the pricey eco stuff. Eg instead of a set of cheeky wipes for £40, cut up some old t shirts, soak them in a margarine tub when used, stick on a hot wash, voila. Good point.

Isn't a lot of this just a money making bandwagon? Plastic lunch boxes have always been reusable, travel cups for coffee are as old as the hills, I must have been so far ahead of the game as I only ever used disposable nappies quite late and then for travelling or when she had a nappy rash.
At the end of the day we all do the best we can with what we have, there will always be those who like to try and belittle others with their current fad credentials.

I bought my Grimms rainbow second hand on ebay for £15.

So glad charity shops are de rigeur now
Having a rummage in the charity shop is one of the most thrilling pastimes ever! I always come back with something for DD and she loves a charity shop too

I've just spent the best part of an hour looking at Grimms rainbows, I'd never heard of them before I read this post. I'm now practicing my pitch to convince my OH they're worth the money!

I had never heard of Grimms rainbows either - wtf

There's making adjustments to your lifestyle to be more environmentally friendly and ethical, and then there's the Insta-Eco style - which you've identified. It can't be a reusable coffee cup you picked up in Asda, or a £2 steel water bottle from Mountain Warehouse - it has to be a Kleen Kanteen. It's great that companies are encouraging people to make more conscious decisions.... But... There is still a lot of mindless consumption involved with people being encouraged to go after the latest colour of Kleen Kanteen, the latests variation on the fucking rainbow ornament. Buying more reusable nappies than any baby could use a reasonable number of times for it to make the materials used in production environmentally worthwhile.

I used to be in that scene, but there was only so many times I could read posts about someone hiding the credit card bill from their husband because of all their Frugi/Babipur splurges and "oh I'll just spend an extra £20 for the free delivery". People posting photos of their latest massive order, and unintentionally putting pressure on other members to have the same things if they happened to be a well-regarded member of the community. Now, I try to make ethical and environmentally conscious decisions for me and the DC, but away from that bubble of must-haves.

There will be some people getting very rich in Wales and Cornwall but, hey, they're ethical.

I use the shampoo bars, they last ages, even on my knee length thick hair. (They also mean my DD will actually wash her hair without a fuss, she has sensory issues and liquid shampoo was a real battle)

I also use reusable cups, lunch boxes etc, they weren't particularly expensive. Or at least no more so than decent tupperwear, but then I didn't already have tupperwear when I bought them so it was money I would have needed to spend either way. I'm not sure there is anything to be gained eco wise by replacing usable plastic stuff you already own, after all that would just be creating more waste.

Clothes are often second hand, but some of it comes from primark and the like because kids grow so quick and ethical clothes are expensive.

Toys were wooden when DD was small but as she got bigger she was so desperate for plastic tat and I gave in.

I think purchasing extra clothes to match with your kids for the 3 months max they are in that size seems like exactly the conspicuous consumption eco friendly people would want to avoid. Agree with pp, reducing and reusing is the way to go and charity shops are awesome.

I didn't do wooden toys after an early experiment. I had twins, they liked to wave toys about. Fortunately, I was the one who got concussion but 2nd hand plastic all the way now.

Oh, there have always been wankers have to have the most expensive and fashionable 'eco' stuff - look at the bullshit Gwyneth Paltrow peddles. As PP have said: buying second-hand is more environmentally friendly than buying anything new. (And why does so much eco-hippy stuff look so shit?)

They might be fashionable but doesn’t sound as if they are either tasteful or environmentally sound. Matching o clothes indeed. Did they not have clothes before they had babies?
How many air miles and how much fuel to deliver trendy cube conditioner? I was shocked to be charged £33 for a bottle of conditioner in Lush at Victoria station. The staff tried to persuade me to complete the purchase because the bottle could be recycled. So much is jus marketing ploys.
If you want environmentally sound lunches and snacks grow carrots and pick an apple of the tree. Then swop fruit and veg with neighbours and make your own yoghurt and ricotta from milk you collect from up the road. Other than that it’s tosh. Absolutely hypocritical tosh.
We do need to reduce plastic but buying a new lunchbox covered in leaves and with a wooden zip tag is no more environmentally sound than a Tupperware you’ve had for years. Worse in fact.

Wooden blocks are good but you can get them very cheaply from a school supplier. Ours had a wooden trolley full of bricks they used as a prom and shopping trolley as well as a sit on ride. That was years ago before environmental stuff added to the price.
Most babies are very happy with a couple of saucepans, a wooden spoon and a few wooden offcuts their grandfather has smoothed into homemade bricks.

Buying second hand is far more ethical (even if plastic tat) than buying new wooden toys.

This. I’m far from hippy dippy but DD has a raft of second hand stuff from friends, we use Tupper ware (mainly in the form of repurposed Chinese food containers!) and plenty of her toys and books are used/toy library specials or even found on the street - we picked up a lovely little cash register complete with beeping calculator and toy money yesterday. For ages her favourite toy was a 2l bottle with dry pasta inside.

I've shopped in charity shops for nearly 40 years. It's always been the best way to get clothes that don't look just like what every other muppet is wearing, for starters. Is it a new thing? Nearly all my friends are also longterm charity shop hounds.

My lunch box is 12 years old!!