AIBU to send a snotty email to school?

[Dontbestupidagain]

My DD is in year 6 of a small school. She is very capable - greater depth in sats results and has a place at a very competitive grammar locally. The rest of her cohort are low ability and there is a high percentage of SEN. This hasn't been a problem generally and I have always felt the school have provided challenge for DD. Today however we had a conversation about what she had been doing at school. She said that in maths she went on the computer like always. I asked what she meant and it turns out that for the last three weeks she has been playing two maths games on the laptop as what the others are doing is too basic for her. She doesn't have a problem with this and has enjoyed it but she has had no teacher input or actual teaching herself. I'm pretty pissed off about this. I understand that she is more capable than the others but she has a right to be taught and stretched too. In my mind they should be setting her up for a strong start at secondary, plugging any gaps they feel she might have and building her confidence. Instead she has had nothing. I am going to write an email but just wanted to check that I'm not being over-zealous in my reaction. AIBU?

A snotty email ?
Is this a joke ?
Get over yourself and your alleged genius daughter

Also if I was a teacher I would be ignoring it.

Tbh.... it’s so close to the end of the year and for her to leave from that school, that I wouod let that go.

I suspect that what is happening is that they’ve pushed her as much as they could and now that SATS are done, they concentrate on the Leaving Assembly etc... they are stepping back a bit and giving in the easy option.
Please remember that they haven’t done that at all throughout all the years in primary.

And let it go. Let your dd enjoy the last couple of weeks at school (she says she is enjoying it!) and have the opportunity to leave with good memories rather than the ones of a grumpy mum (and grumpy teacher!)

Your DD should not be sitting there doing nothing in Maths. You are right, and should complain. Do bear in mind that children sometimes have an odd understanding of time, so don’t go in all guns blazing.

I don't think my DC did any maths at all in the weeks after SATS.

She'll spend a lot of her first term in Y7 recapping as well ... I really couldn't get worried about this!

To some PP, whynis it such an issue to have and say that a child is really high abilities?
On MN it seems it’s seen as the most awful thing to ever be, something to hide and never talk about.
The OP will know if her dd is top of the class or doing extremely well. SATS will say that. Her school report will say that. (And Yes her entry into a good grammar school say that too)

Over reaction. Let her have some fun. Pushy parent.

I think they have done a cracking job, to support all those with LDs and your amazingly wonderful DD.

I highly recommend [https://uk.ixl.com/math/] if you really feels she needs to do more before starting at her competitive grammar. It's not overly expensive, it follows the curriculum by year group and has brought my DD up from 'struggling at the bottom of her year' in the beginning of year 8 to 'where she should be' heading in to year 10, after being home educated for nearly 2 years. Imagine what it could do for your DD.

Give everyone in that school a big thank you for not ignoring your DD in favour of those who need their help for all this time and cut them a little slack for actually trying to give those who really need it a final push!!

Year 6. July. Excellent SATs results and a place at grammar school.

Leave the kid be. Leave the teachers be. Thank your lucky stars your child doesn’t need extra help at this point in their school life.

A "snotty" email sounds revolting and disgusting! How would you achieve that?
Virtual mucous?

The rest of her cohort are low ability and there is a high percentage of SEN

at that bit - this is why I love that my SEN (ASD, ADHD) kid is doing 11 GCSEs at the competitive grammar school he goes to (and is likely to do very well). I just feel sorry that he has to bump shoulders with kids of parents who have an attitude like yours.

For the record, I don't think any school teaches their kids much in the second half of year 6, especially in the last few weeks. That's generally a fun, letting-your-hair-down time. There'll be plenty of time in secondary school for academic pressure, you ain't seen nuthin' yet.

Gosh you lot can be quite nasty. My DD is in a very small cohort. I am not being disparaging by saying they are low ability. Not one other child even passed their sats. I know because we are a small community and are happy to share.

My sons not doing much now. However, given he has SEN and is low ability I guess it doesn't matter. hmm

See actually I think you're making my point for me. I feel like this has been true for my daughter the whole year. She is naturally clever but she also works hard. She doesn't get attention or recognition for this. She rarely gets rewards (such as housepoints) in school. I feel it gets taken for granted that she is capable and this sums it up. She deserves some teacher time too.

Once, just once, it would be nice to receive an email thanking us for getting a child to greater depth

You forget the basic rule. If a child is successful that's because they have such wonderful parents, if they are unsuccessful it's because they had poor teaching.

In over twenty years I could count on my fingers without needing my toes the number of parents who have said Thanks and oddly enough it was more usual from the parents of the poorer children, not the more entitled.

How do you know everyone else is of 'lower' ability than your DD? Yabu, you are not a teacher but very condescending.

You sound a delight.

Poor school.

If you have concerns then why can't you do what any reasonable and sensible parent would do and simply contact the school and have a perfectly polite and reasonable discussion?

The attitude of 'my child is 10 times better so should I sent a snotty email' is a rude and unpleasant attitude to have.

OP, on MN you are a pushy parent if you teach your child to read before they’re seven. Ignore. The teacher definitely shouldn’t be letting your DD spend three weeks on a computer.

To some PP, whynis it such an issue to have and say that a child is really high abilities?

By all means say your child is high achieving, clever, bright, academic. Use whichever terms you like, but there's no need to put down the rest of the children when doing so.

@Dontbestupidagain

What more exactly do you want your DD to achieve?

Oh and my son also has SEN and went to the local Grammar.

If you want my advice OP, let it go - she has got into the grammar, there is really no point making complaints about lack of teacher time at this time of year.

And the teachers must have done something right if she has got into a competitive grammar...

Not one other child even passed their sats.

Like I said, thank your lucky stars that your child doesn’t need this extra help at the end of Year 6.

Secondary will be a whole new ball game in streamed classes where she’ll be stretched with other children if a similar ability.

Pick your battles. This isn’t one of them.

It’s surprising you can’t see that.

Get down off your high horse and stop been so bloody snobby. Year 6s work incredibly hard and deserve the last few weeks to be fun. Our year 6s have practiced for their end of year show, been on a couple of trips and have had great fun playing in the forest school area.
So if you feel the need to send an email make it a nice one thanking the school for helping your daughter reach her potential.

Are you for real?

I think you obviously need a holiday where you can maybe 'get yer heid oot o' yer erse!'

What prompted your choice of username? It’s like an REM lyric,