To tell random parents I think their children are well behaved

[Tootytata]

I'm sitting in an airport waiting to board my flight (by myself since it's work related). A family with 6 children are sitting opposite me. They've been sitting there for about 30 minutes but the children are so well behaved. Ages probably ranging from 3-4 to 13-14years old.

The oldest is doing a crossword puzzle. One of the children is trying to make the another laugh by giving him a teddy bear.

I'm sure not every day is sunshine and roses but I'd love to tell them how well behaved I think their children are. Don't think I will though because it's too random a comment to make! I'll look weird won't I?!

I've been up since 3am so tiredness is kicking in...

Do it! I have been feeling really guilty that I've not been engaging with my baby enough (I also have a toddler!) but in the supermarket last week - as I was chatting to the baby about what to buy - a random lady stopped and said 'It's so nice to see a mum talking to her baby.' Made me feel so much better!

I've done this also, and would appreciate it very much in the unlikely event anyone said it to me about my kids. I once emailed a school to say how well their class had behaved on the tube. I got a lovely reply from the head , who said how it made her day.

Definitely do it.
People complain so much these days, zero tolerance.
My Dd was v travel sick once and we stopped off at a service station, instead of going for the whole " kiddies box" my dd just wanted a bread roll.
How many times is one told a bureaucratic rule...this time, however, she got a bread roll free.
I actually wrote to the service st, naming the kindness of that woman.

Its important, as another PP said to celebrate the good things in life, and that includes parents doing their best to make life tolerable for themselves, their children and the wider population.
Congratulate the parents, don't hold back, it'll mean so much, they'll probably never forget it, just like I haven't forgotten that kindness.

Agree with everyone else, do it! I say similar when warranted and I still warmly remember being complimented on my interaction with my then toddler on a long coach journey

DW, DS (about 7-8) and I were having lunch in a supermarket cafe one day. Out of nowhere an older lady stopped as she was leaving, leant over to DW and just commented on how well behaved DS was. I hope the fact it was over 15 years ago tells you how it stuck .

I know this isn't exactly the same, but I've just recently been on holiday with my then 5 month old DD. I was so anxious about the flights and on the flight home we were stuck on the plane for 4 hours and then taken off, stopped in a hotel overnight, transferred to another airport 2 hours away and eventually flown home 24 hours after we were meant to be. The amount of people who commented saying that she had been fantastic and how well we kept her entertained really made us feel so much better after such a stressful journey! We also had many waiters/waitresses comment that she had been so well behaved and they hadn't even heard her (even when she was clearly kicking off). I really think it's such a lovely thing to do!

Aw yes I bet you will totally make their day! Someone stopped and told me I was a good mum when my toddler had just thrown all her food on the floor and I was literally pulling my hair out. It really made me feel so much better when I was having a terrible day. More people should pay random compliments, the world would be a happier place!

Well I would certainly do it!.My son and his friend were out with us in a restaurant, and we were complimented on how well behaved and polite they were!.When I was on the bus I also told a lady with 3 children how good their behaviour was . And she was doing a good job !.She was pleased and amazed!

I often want to do this, but I worry that I might sound patronising as I know I have a bad way with words and manner, so I don't do it, at the risk of being told where to go! Am racking my brains to remember if anyone ever said it to me when my child was little, but I can only remember my own mother ever saying that, in some surprise!

Why not? We all love a compliment.

I was such a well-behaved child but then I was scared of my parents like hell.

Absolutely!
I have been told this once or twice and it really does feel good, and makes up for the times when I feel they are not being so well behaved :)

Absolutely!
I wish that had been said to me when mine were small because they were well behaved children.

Yes I always compliment strangers if I see something good and the moment is right, it makes my day when it happens to me. No-one has ever taken it badly yet!

Yes tell the parents! I love it when strangers point out my kids being well behaved and comment on their good manners/politeness. It's just nice to know the hard work you're putting in parenting is paying off.

Absolutely tell them!

I still remember fondly when the lady that sat behind my DS and I on a long haul flight told me how well behaved she thought he was during the flight.

And another occasion when he was being naughty when we were out somewhere (I can't remember the situation) and a lady commented on how well I had dealt with him.

Both gave me a massive boost in trying circumstances.

My DD;'s 18 now, but until she was 7, she had the most terrible tantrums in public. We were in Tesco, and she wanted to go to the cafe. I refused, as we didn't have time, and she ran into the clothes section, and ended up coiled up under a rack of clothing, screaming. Eventually I calmed her down - took some time!

Quite a young woman came round from the other side of the racks, said she was studying child psychology, and what a great textbook example of good parenting I was giving. Obviously made my day! Guess she just felt really sorry for me, and wanted to build up my self esteem... She didn't praise my DD's behaviour though!

I was in the supermarket last week and I followed round (not in a stalkerish way - we both just happened to be shopping in the same aisles at the same time) a lady with 3 little ones all preschool. The youngest who couldn't have been more than 10 months was sat in the trolly smiling away and the other two were either side of the trolly each holding onto it. They didn't let go once. I didn't say anything but it brought a lump to my throat at how lovely and well behaved these three little children were. and I was reminded of my eldest 2 when they were little who held onto the trolly like this - sadly number 3 had other ideas

There are some good kids out there

I went on a flight once and was separated on the plane from DH and somehow ended up with both kids on my own (age 1 and 4). Someone was taken ill on the flight and it had to make an emergency landing and then refuel and was delayed for several hours. I had a limited supply of toys and games (no screens) and the 1 year old was pretty noisy. A lady in front of me stood up and asked me really loudly to stop 1 yo banging and being noisy because he was being v annoying. It was mortifying and i was almost in tears. A couple behind me were lovely and started playing peekaboo with my kids and when the flight was finally over they said really loudly how well behaved my kids were. I could have kissed them!!

I was with my friend when someone complimented her on her children's behaviour. I was so pleased for her, I can't imagine how she felt! I've also been with her when her children are little shits and have been on the receiving end of disapproving looks too, but it's the nice comments that stick with you and proves that you are doing something right, despite the stressy moments. I hope you said something OP!

Americans are definitely better at complimenting outfits, though most of my experience has been in Disney . Every day someone would compliment a t-shirt either my DP or I was wearing!

i have well behaved children and it gets commented on all the time. I love it. Makes me feel like the years of hard work is worth it. Also I find it boosts the children. I always repeat to them "did you hear that?" when the people leave and praise/reward them accordingly. Its important to conduct yourself well (no matter your age) so people commenting is a good thing and I always try to praise random childrens behaviour and manners if I see it :)

When we first took our granddaughter out on our own, she would be about 1, we were astonished in a restaurant when a random stranger said how well behaved she was, sitting in a high chair quietly getting on with her food. It was only when we went out more that we saw how badly behaved many children are!

I wouldn’t and would feel odd to hear it. DH is far more likely to have comments like this. I’d likely laugh it off as one of mine will no doubt be well behaved due to medication. I’m dreading the flight we have booked. First since they were very small.

It’s a lovely thing when people say. Makes you feel like you are not completely useless after all.

Can lead to unintended consequences though - ds was born 9 months after a wedding where we got lots of praise for dd’s behaviour!

Going against the grain here but I'd think why does she think I care what she thinks? Harsh but to me it just reinforces that people are judgemental and next time they might not be behaving so well, also a bit condescending. But i appear to be in the minority!