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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask for this money?

113 replies

Bluebluebluebell · 05/07/2019 22:05

Ex and I bought a car together a few years ago. Due to his needing it for work, we agreed that he would use it to commute but I would have priority over it at the weekend.

Now we’ve recently split, he wants to keep it. He is arguing that because he paid the insurance he has essentially invested more money into it. However my argument is that whilst this is true, adding me as an additional driver actually lowered the premium than if he was sole driver. This is because he is in a profession which is considered high risk whereas mine is viewed as low risk.

However we split costs for maintenance and service etc.

The car was bought for £20k and is now worth about £9-10k.

I think the fair thing would be for him to buy his share from me. Or we sell it and split the proceeds. He thinks I’m being petty and that what he spent on me over the years is way more than £5K but he’s not asking for that back. I think that is ridiculous as we have BOTH spent money on each other and gifts are different to assets like a car that we BOUGHT TOGETHER.

Sorry for the caps. I’m really pissed off with his attitude and making me feel like I’m being petty and unreasonable.

Am I really BU?

OP posts:
Sunshine93 · 05/07/2019 22:18

It's a shared asset and he wants to keep it so he pays you for your share. Cost of insurance, who used it most etc are all irrelevant.

Blubluboo · 05/07/2019 22:21

He should pay your share! Stand your ground here.

Bluebluebluebell · 05/07/2019 22:28

The trouble is that everyone in his family think that I’m being petty and uncouth, that it’s undignified and I’m embarrassing myself asking for my share of the car.

Well, £5k may not be very much to them but it’s damn well a lot of money to me!

OP posts:
HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 05/07/2019 22:31

Whose name is the finance in?

Everything else is irrelevant!

TwistyTop · 05/07/2019 22:33

Who is the official owner of the vehicle?

You aren't being petty.

Bluebluebluebell · 05/07/2019 22:34

It is under joint names. Ex is suggesting we take my name off and he take over payment as sole owner.

OP posts:
Keepingthingsinteresting · 05/07/2019 22:35

Ignore his family, they would say that but why would you care what they think!

Soontobe60 · 05/07/2019 22:38

Op, if the car were to be sold and the finance paid off, how much would be left? Just remember, the selling price is well below the market price to buy the same car, go on webuyanycar to get a good idea.

Bluebluebluebell · 05/07/2019 22:41

@Soontobe60

The car has a conservative market estimate of £10k. There are similar cars sold through dealerships for 15k.

That’s why I consider my asking for 5k to be fair.

OP posts:
Bluebluebluebell · 05/07/2019 22:42

Sorry, I meant net estimate not market

OP posts:
Soontobe60 · 05/07/2019 22:43

Do you have finance on it? If so, how much is left to pay?

DingDongDenny · 05/07/2019 22:44

Well then suggest you keep the car and he is being petty if he doesn't agree to this

Same thing

LostInNorfolk · 05/07/2019 22:44

Can car finance or ownership be in joint names?

PawPawNoodle · 05/07/2019 22:45

Who is the registered keeper of the car?

Bluebluebluebell · 05/07/2019 22:47

We’ve paid just over 10k (net) already with just under 10k (not including interest) left.

I am thinking as it is a joint asset, either he pays me half of what it is worth now OR we sell it and split the proceeds.

OP posts:
Bluebluebluebell · 05/07/2019 22:48

He is the registered keeper. We decided this as he used it 5 days a week as opposed to my 2.
However we are joint owners of it.

OP posts:
StepAwayFromGoogle · 05/07/2019 22:48

They expect you to gift him £5k as a breaking up present? Fuck that, OP. Stand your ground - you'll take your name off the car when he pays you for half of it. Paying the insurance doesn't mean he owns more of it. He paid the insurance because he was driving it 5 days a week.

Countrylifeornot · 05/07/2019 22:50

But there's nothing to split. Car is worth 10k, you owe 10k + interest.
The car is actually in the red

StepAwayFromGoogle · 05/07/2019 22:50

Sell it and split the proceeds - less messy that way.

lyralalala · 05/07/2019 22:51

How is your share worth 5k cash when you owe 10k on finance for a car that’s worth 9/10k?

If he pays you plus pays the finance then he’ll be paying 15k for a car worth 9/10

Greysparkles · 05/07/2019 22:52

Eh? There's still 10 grand to pay? Are you going to be paying your 5k of that???

You can't buy a car and expect the entire amount of money youve put in back?

lyralalala · 05/07/2019 22:52

I am thinking as it is a joint asset, either he pays me half of what it is worth now OR we sell it and split the proceeds.

If you do that and it sells for 9k you’ll be left with half of the outstanding finance, not any profit

user1486131602 · 05/07/2019 22:54

Sell it, it forces him to pay what he should. And it cuts your ties from him emotionally and financially and those of his family.

BumbleBeee69 · 05/07/2019 22:54

The trouble is that everyone in his family think that I’m being petty and uncouth, that it’s undignified and I’m embarrassing myself asking for my share of the car

Screw them, let's see them walk away from 5K.. yeah right Hmm

PawPawNoodle · 05/07/2019 22:54

Ah just seen that it's on finance. Neither of you own it then.