AIBU to refuse to take a pregnancy test?

[Thecatsslippers]

I am 4 days late.

Been trying TTC for almost a year now. All the excitement has drained out of me and I've lost count of the amount of times I was a couple of days late, POAS, and then had AF turn up.

Right now I am schrodinger's cat, both pregnant and not pregnant and I don't want to remove that tiny piece of hope.

Fingers crossed for you. Do what feels easiest, or at least, less difficult.

you are being sensible, 4 days late is nothing.

A year TTC is nothing either though, it sounds like you are over-invested if you have been obsessing about your periods every month. It's a long process, and not always a smooth one, for your own sanity you need to give yourself some mental break about it.

I’ve been in your position, when TTC my periods were all over the place some months, on one occasion it showed up over a week late just to mess with my mind, another time it came early and lasted 9 days! I found it easier to go with the assumption that I wasn’t pregnant, it softened the blow a bit.

Wait a few more days and then see how you feel, the stress of TTC can play havoc with your hormones which may be affecting your cycle so it may still show up.

Thing is the longer you leave it the more build up and you are just going to give yourself more hope. What’s the point it sitting in hope? Do a test, of it’s negative you draw a line under this month and get cracking on the next.

A year isn’t a long time with TTC really, it’s honestly not. TTC is a long process for most and it’s important to remember that.

You definitely don't have to take one today, or even tomorrow. Wait until you're ready.

Wait as long as you want to. YANBU.

I waited until I was a week late

YANBU. I always waited until I was a week late to test. That way I knew the result would most likely be accurate.

Wait if you can, I’ve just had 2 chemical pregnancies after a MMC and it’s really messed with my head. I wouldn’t have known if I hadn’t tested early.

YANBU. At all. And having been in your position, I'd say you do what's right for you, and cling onto that hope for as long as you want. Either way, you are going to know soon enough.

All X for you that you will soon receive that BFP. x

I so treasured that private time, the limbo time where in my head I could almost be a mum again to a new baby. I didn't tell anyone my dates, this particular IVF clinic didn't do early blood tests either so I recall it was silent without phone calls or intrusion.

My daughter was born later that year.

I'd put it off as long as you can stand.

it’s so hard.

I completely understand how you feel.

I dread to think how much money I wasted on tests. And the amount of tears shed.

Do whatever is best for you! And good luck!

YANBU, do what feels right for you.

Oh, I've been there.
YANBU at all OP.
You don't have to test at all as long as you are taking your folic acid.
Leave it a month if you want. AF will come or she won't.
I hope she doesn't!

I was in your position, having 3 mmcs after DS. In the end I left it a week-10 days because I couldn't endure the negative tests. Do whatever helps you through x

I would leave it for a while too. Took me more than two years to get pregnant the first time. When it finally happened it took me by surprise when I started being sick, because I hadn't been tracking any more.
Second pregnancy took two weeks.

I understand. Taking a test means you think it could be positive, and you don’t want to give yourself that hope

Do whatever feels right for you and your mental health right now.

I always used to wait a week too (and I say "always" as I have 3 DCs but had more miscarriages than that so it was quite a few times....). Each to their own but I don't think that taking a test early actually does help as if it's negative, isn't there going to be that nagging feeling of "perhaps it was too early, perhaps I should do another one".

Good luck !

A year isn’t a long time with TTC really

Perhaps not relatively
But I imagine that on an individual level it feels interminable

A year is a loooooooon time when you want something badly.

I, personally, would have peed on about 100 sticks by now, but do what feels right for you, if you can hold off, do it.

A year is a long time, especially since we all have that friend who stopped using contraception and got pregnant first go.

I always waited a week, OP. Otherwise I ended up testing a week after "just to be sure" anyway.

Four days late is nothing. In your place, I wouldn't do a pregnancy test, wait until it's a fortnight. I hope you are!

Lots of people try to conceive for a long time, think there's something wrong, then become pregnant and end up having three children in quick succession :-). Sometimes there is no rhyme nor reason. Please try to think of other things, create diversions and enjoy your life.

I liked that Schroedinger phase as well, and never tested early. Do what feels right for you.

Ahhh yeah been there. Know exactly how you feel. When I fell pregnant, I had period pain for 2 days and was definitely not pregnant in my head. Lo and behold, no period appeared. Wait as long as you want BUT what always spurred me on was knowing that if I wasn’t, I could drink guilt free for 2 weeks before the next try!