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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To stay in a hotel without booking?

262 replies

ps1991 · 01/07/2019 20:19

My husband is away with work in Manchester from yesterday to Thursday, I had planned on travelling tomorrow to stay with him and then come home together on Thursday.

I’m really worried about staying in the hotel he’s at with our baby as the hotel is only booked for him. Will the hotel say anything? I have looked for other hotels locally and can’t find anything that we can afford, especially once we say we have a baby with us 🙄.

Am I right to be worried or will the hotel staff not care?

OP posts:
sackrifice · 01/07/2019 22:09

We've done this loads of times.

Also, of course they don't need a list of all people for insurance purposes! I've been in several fire alarms in hotels, they don't stand round ticking you off a list for fucks sake. It's pile out and then when the all clear is given, it's every person for themselves traipsing back up.

Littleheart5 · 01/07/2019 22:09

I’ve had P stay with me many many times when I travelled for work, and done the same with him. Circa 12 times! It’s never been noted or commented on. Whoever wasn’t the guest wouldn’t have breakfast though, the other would just sneak a croissant or yogurt up!!

Allhailthesun · 01/07/2019 22:10

I’m pretty sure the companies that don’t like employees sharing are either worried about money or “ inappropriate” guests.
Sure a married couple would be able to state their case as long as you pay any difference and your own food and drink.

Hotels couldn%’t give a shit so long as double occupancy is paid.

Notcopingwellhere · 01/07/2019 22:10

If I were his employer I'd be annoyed. He's been sent on a business trip, not a family getaway.

Unless the DH is supposed to be spending the evening with clients, why is seeing his wife and child in the evening and overnight in the hotel any different from him going home to his own house when he finishes work for the day?

northernruth · 01/07/2019 22:11

Not quite sure why so many posters think that if a company has paid for a hotel room they have also somehow paid for the employee to be on his own and away from his family for the entire night....

A business trip involves a hotel stay for convenience, not so the employee can be locked up.

And so on that basis I'd just tell them, or tell the hotel

Original poster
ps1991 · 01/07/2019 22:13

It is a big chain hotel, I’m just going to tell them when I arrive. There’s no breakfast, no evening meal. Husband will get meals reimbursed and obviously I will pay for all mine separately. I understand that it seems like I’m being unreasonable and wanting to get around paying for something, however I don’t want to pay for something that I can’t see why there would be an extra cost.

I have literally just looked at a hotel which was £188 for my husband and I or £309 if we added the baby!!! Some hotels have silly policies and I don’t want to fall victim to that.

OP posts:
HellInAHandCartThatsWhat · 01/07/2019 22:13

Just stay there. I do this all the time, dh staying with me or me staying with him. As long as you pay for breakfast it’s fine.

Gatoadigrado · 01/07/2019 22:17

Today 22:11 northernruth

‘Not quite sure why so many posters think that if a company has paid for a hotel room they have also somehow paid for the employee to be on his own and away from his family for the entire night....’

And once again... none of us are thinking that. We are pointing out that there may be a company policy and the obvious thing to do is check. Chances are they will be absolutely fine as long as no extra costs incurred. But if they arent fine with it (and the OP said she isn’t sure they will be) then better to find that out beforehand and make other arrangements

TheTrollFairy · 01/07/2019 22:17

Might be worth calling ahead. If you’re staying in a premier inn (either that or travel lodge - I forget which) have the family rooms on the ground floor to stop people being disturbed at night

WorraLiberty · 01/07/2019 22:19

I've never got this Mumsnet reply of "What if there's a fire"?

Hotel receptionists don't keep tabs on their gets going in and out.

So at no point would they know how many people are in the building anyway, surely?

Or am I missing something? Genuine question btw.

WorraLiberty · 01/07/2019 22:19

*guests going in and out

northernruth · 01/07/2019 22:22

@Gatoadigrado agree with this, as I've said, but there are a few posters being outraged that someone might dare have theire family stay on a business trip. I suspect they've not travelled on business much

Sciurus83 · 01/07/2019 22:38

So much hand wringing! Wouldn't think twice about this, not costing the company anything and the hotel won't give a shiny poo. Imagine if no one could ever sneak someone into their hotel room, what a dull place the world would be Grin

PCohle · 01/07/2019 22:44

It wouldn't really occur to me that this would be a problem. Big chain hotels don't keep track of who's going in and out of certain rooms.

Unless you're massively taking the piss and trying to sleep 6 people in one room it's hardly an issue.

Some posters would clearly be aghast at the shenanigans that went on during conferences and work trips in my youth Grin

Fedupofballs · 01/07/2019 22:45

I often get asked if I want 2 keys when I check in (on my own) with work. I think the chances of there being any issue are slim to none. It might be a bit different if you needed a cot to be provided or an extra bed, but you don’t.

TantricTwist · 01/07/2019 22:53

No one is going to notice or care in the slightest so just go, stay and say nothing more about it.

C8H10N4O2 · 01/07/2019 22:57

C8H10N4O2 Your post is a perfect example of why the OP’s dh needs to check with his company, because clearly different companies have different policies

Which part of my post led you to think I'm suggesting otherwise?

I actually say that in my post. However IME my peer companies and all our clients take the same approach. That would be most of the larger corporates.

Checkthemeaning · 01/07/2019 22:57

We've all brought one night stands back to a hotel room haven't we & not really analysed it this deeply? Just me then, ha.

Ontheboardwalk · 01/07/2019 22:58

How old is the baby that's staying in this room?

burnoutbabe · 01/07/2019 23:00

Agreed, I have stayed at quite a few hotels In my past where I am definitely not on the booking!
Actually I think bringing wife a d kid along may look worse to the company than randomer staying over. It may make them think "hmm did they NEED to stay over for this meeting or just using it to get a free trip away?"

Gatoadigrado · 01/07/2019 23:02

C8H10N4O2

‘C8H10N4O2 Your post is a perfect example of why the OP’s dh needs to check with his company, because clearly different companies have different policies

Which part of my post led you to think I'm suggesting otherwise?’

No part of it! That’s why I said it’s a perfect example of why the OP needs to check. Because we have no idea if he’s working for some big corporate set up who would actually encourage spouses to stay. Or whether he’s working for a company that want to be informed of anyone staying in a room they are paying for but are ok about it. Or whether he’s working for a company that would discipline him if he doesn’t inform them and they find out. Smile

HeronLanyon · 01/07/2019 23:02

I thought this was all quite straightforward/storm in tea cup and it has become oddly complex. Good luck op.

Proseccoinamug · 01/07/2019 23:04

Personally I’d just do it.

But then I often stay in hotels with more dc in the room than I’ve declared. They really won’t notice.

mossmurray · 01/07/2019 23:05

I'd be more worried about your DH's employer rather than the hotel.
I work for a huge well known company and know of at least one person who had been disciplined for this in our team alone.,

C8H10N4O2 · 01/07/2019 23:08

Gatoadigrado

Oh fair enough I misread you.

It is the case though that none of our clients would ban this - the only thing most companies worry about is HMRC exposure for inappropriate expenses. Morale is a real issue for travelling workers and most good employers know this. I'd question an employer who arbitrarily banned it when it incurred no cost or impact to the work.