A 'partner' is someone you are in a LTR with, probably cohabiting, not someone you met last month or are dating.

[RubberTreePlant]

It means life partner not shag partner.

AIBU?

Who cares?

Meh

And what do you call the grey area in the middle of life partner and shag partner (as they're not the only two options surely!)
And when is the milestone to go from shag partner to life partner? When is it allowed to call someone your partner?

I think it's such a grey area and if someone sees their SO as someone they're serious enough to call their partner then what's the problem?

I do. It sounds ridiculous and desperate.

@RubberTreePlant I think when you get older and are heading for a more mature relationship, 'boyfriend'/'girlfriend' starts sounding more pathetic than 'partner', surely?

@RubberTreePlant or more ridiculous, should I say!

I just say it because I'm 33 and I think saying "boyfriend" makes me sound like a teenager 🤷‍♀️

If I was only shagging them they'd just be referred to as "friend".

YANBU!!!

Why the rush to label things anyway? Diana can be called Diana. Matt can be called Matt. "Hello, this is Matt". Easy.

I kind of get you but ‘boyfriend’ feels like such a young person word. I’d feel silly saying as I got older.

YANBU as the word is over-used.

I have not referred to the deluded woman spending some of her life with Mr Johnson as his 'partner' and wish the media would stop doing so.

Cos Diana needs to mark her territory with Matt before Mary starts cracking on with Matt.

I just call him by his name to people, usually the standing very close to him indicates we are together. If I label him I call him my partner as hes pushing 40 and hasn't been a boy for quite some time.

He refers to me as his bird which I secretly quite like.

Agree, when someone has been with someone a few weeks or months calling them their partner stinks of desperation. A partner is someone you're in a committed relationship with, not someone you met weeks ago

I met now DH when I was 33, started going out at 34. He then became my boyfriend, though I did feel a bit self-conscious about saying that. When we decided to get married (same thing as 'getting engaged'), he became my fiance. Once we were married, he became my husband.

I guess I just gave you an idea of my age by using the phrase 'going out'

It'll take more than a word to stop that Mary

Op, I think you sound ridiculous and desperate and like you're somehow trying to validate yourself or your own relationship. You're obviously one of those posters that cant wait to stick the knife into somebody coming here for advice that "you're not they're DP, YOU'RE just a girlfriend". Tbh it's my number one annoyance on mumsnet and always seems to come from ulterior motives to want to tear apart another person on the basis of what you think their relationship is. I get the feeling you're an ex wife or something that has experience in putting down, or trying to put down, your ex's new DP.

‘Gentleman caller’
Dear friend

Oh wait, I didn't read the title properly.

You're right if I was just dating someone or it'd had only been going on a few weeks.. they probably wouldnt get a 'title' or if i was talking about them I'd refer to the as "the guy I'm seeing".

But if it were official and had been going on a few months then yeah, it'd be 'partner', or even better "my lad" (northerner here).

I've had a thread once talking about my relationship at the time and we were seeing eachother for 5 (maybe??) Months and I referred to him as my partner.. I didn't really think anything of it until someone on here pointed out that he wasn't my partner as we hadn't been with eachother long enough.. they had a point I guess but I just can't bring myself to say "boyfriend"

He refers to me as his bird which I secretly quite like.

You do?!

I use the term partner because I'm 33 and my OH is 45. I feel a little bit too old to call him my boyfriend even though I do very occasionally. We've known each other two years and nigh on see each other every day, fo on several holidays a year and I sleep at his twice a week. Boyfriend just feels a bit... young?

YABU. Partner might often mean longish-term, but it is also a word that adults use instead of girlfriend/boyfriend in order not to sound like a teenager.

Op, I think you sound ridiculous and desperate and like you're somehow trying to validate yourself or your own relationship

Oh Christ no. I'm actually getting divorced, and it'll be FWBs only for me from now on, TBH.

Maybe that's why I'm questioning the hasty mating thing

You're right if I was just dating someone or it'd had only been going on a few weeks.. they probably wouldnt get a 'title' or if i was talking about them I'd refer to the as "the guy I'm seeing".

But if it were official and had been going on a few months then yeah, it'd be 'partner', or even better "my lad" (northerner here).

Yes, okay, that sounds sane.

The only people I know who use the term partner have been together decades but have never married. Like life partner. Most others I know get married after a few years so its husband / wife.