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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Made to feel like a bit of a twat

131 replies

HouseworkAvoider10 · 27/06/2019 10:02

My colleague is leaving his job, finishing tomorrow.
He does charity work, which involves sending stationery out to developing countries.
He has taken most of his stuff home and has also taken my whole tray of stationery to give to this charity abroad. It was on my desk yesterday.
I have been left with 4 small lead pencils and a black pen. Everything else is gone, including the actual stationery tray, my USB stick with stuff on it, all taken by him.
Its quite a lot of stuff, which I have collected over time.
Feel like a bit of a twat for asking for my stationery back when its going to charity, but these are the things I work with every day I will need them again.
He has admitted that he has it and says he will give it back tomorrow. He said its for the charity.
I do need my stuff back.
I think he's a CF.
AIBU?

OP posts:

Tawdrylocalbrouhaha · 27/06/2019 10:52

Do you even really need to ask?! He's stolen your property! You get it back, and you give the kleptomaniac weirdo a sharp rebuke!

Itwouldtakemuchmorethanthis · 27/06/2019 10:54

You are not the twat. Get your stuff back.

ChicCroissant · 27/06/2019 10:56

Can he go home at lunchtime and get it?

DingDongDenny · 27/06/2019 11:01

I work for a charity and definitely don't condone stealing for charitable purposes

I wouldn't be surprised if he kept some of it for himself, he sounds dodgy

justilou1 · 27/06/2019 11:05

Wow! Interesting that it was only your stuff that was nicked! He’s not just a CF, he’s an arsehole who’s making a statement about how he feels about you.

Drum2018 · 27/06/2019 11:13

He's the twat! If he doesn't bring it back tomorrow tell him you will report him to his precious charity for theft. Taking your personal belongings is not acceptable. Using the charity as an excuse is pathetic and I'm sure the charity would not be impressed. Tell him you support your own chosen charities and don't steal from people to donate to them. Make a descriptive list (colours of pens, pencils, etc) of all the items he stole and give him and your boss a copy today, and check off every item he brings back tomorrow. Check the USB stick to make sure all files are still there. What a CF!

HoppingPavlova · 27/06/2019 11:16

Have his car towed, sell it and donate the money to charity. That’s beyond a CF.

happybunny007 · 27/06/2019 11:18

I can’t believe you haven’t hit the roof over this!

Reith · 27/06/2019 11:24

This is really weird. Who donates a few half full pens and a novelty Butlins pencil?

missbattenburg · 27/06/2019 11:25

It's not 'doing a nice thing for charity' if you nick someone else's stuff to give them.

Doing a nice thing is giving up something of your own (time, money, stuff, skills), not forcing someone else to give up something of theirs.

I bet he gives himself a nice moral pat on the back for the "good" he does

Lalliella · 27/06/2019 11:25

He is a thief, a CF and a virtue signaller. Sounds like you’re well rid of him as a colleague. Of course he has to give your stuff back. Tell him you donate to charities of your own choice and you don’t appreciate him choosing for you. (Don’t get me started on people who donate to charity instead of sending Christmas cards 😡)

poopypants · 27/06/2019 11:26

He sounds weird. Certifiably weird. Good thing he's leaving

TheInvestigator · 27/06/2019 11:26

That's not OK. The charity would also much prefer him to donate new stuff which has been specifically gifted to him for the charity. You don't just take a tray of stuff which belongs to someone else!

You're not the twat. He is. Don't let him guilt you. You give to charities of your choice; you don't need to accept having your thugs stolen in the name of "charity".

Have you checked with him that he will bring the whole lot back?

Powerbunting · 27/06/2019 11:30

Well yeah you could get some more. Like I can get a new car or stereo if mine are stolen. Still theft if someone takes what is mine without asking

Piffle11 · 27/06/2019 11:31

He's a thief, pure and simple. The 'its' for charity' is irrelevant. Can you imagine swiping stuff from a supermarket and telling security 'it's for charity', and expecting to get away with it?? He clearly thought he could get away with taking your stuff - are you easy going, or reasonably quiet? I'm looking for a reason why he didn't do the rounds, taking stuff from other people … maybe he thought 'oh Housework won't speak up for herself. I'm glad you told your supervisor, he really can't get away with this. You are definitely not in the wrong or being a twat! He is trying to make you feel bad by using the charity bit, but he's being massively out of order!

PeoniesarePink · 27/06/2019 11:33

I'd be furious and making him aware that theft is a criminal offence.

tenlittlecygnets · 27/06/2019 11:38

He didn't really explain why he took it but he tried to argue that it was for charity and that it was just some stationery and that I could go get some more.

Yeah, it's easy enough to give to charity when you're giving other people's stuff! What a bizarre thing to do. Glad your supervisor is on board.

honeygirlz · 27/06/2019 11:39

Does he think he's Robin Hood?

Bet he keeps the good stuff for himself. Twat. Why did he target you?

DarlingNikita · 27/06/2019 11:40

I could go get some more

Apart from that not being the point, you can't easily replace the stuff you bought on holiday.

God, he's a tit.

fedup21 · 27/06/2019 11:41

Presumably he wouldn’t just go into WH Smith’s and take a load of stuff there to give to his charity?

He’d know that wasn’t ok!?

EarlGreyOfTwinings · 27/06/2019 11:46

My supervisor knows.
She told him to bring it all back and told him off for pinching it.

and rightly so!
Of all the CF he's one of the winners. He's free to use his own money to contribute to any charity he likes, not stealing other people's property.

I would also have given him a bollocking if he had help himself in the stationary cupboard.

Isatis · 27/06/2019 11:47

He didn't really explain why he took it but he tried to argue that it was for charity and that it was just some stationery and that I could go get some more.

By that logic, why didn't he clear out the company's computers because they could just get some more? Does he think it stops being theft if it's just stationery:

I'd point out that you have your own arrangements for charity giving and it's really not his place to take your belongings to support whichever charity he fancies. Anyway, I suspect it would be much more cost-effective for the charity in question to have money so it can bulk buy stationery according to its specific requirements.

ChicCroissant · 27/06/2019 11:48

Theft is gross misconduct, surely?

Bezalelle · 27/06/2019 11:51

Thieving git!

NorthEndGal · 27/06/2019 11:52

He wants to be charitable? He can put his hand in his own pocket and buy the supplies.

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