For getting red rage when changing toddlers nappy?

[Mummoomoocow]

He used to be such a happy little baby when having his nappy changed but recently he’s been rolling and refusing to lay still.

I’ve noticed two finger bruises on his thighs and I’m certain it was me from trying to stop him rolling shit all over the place! I feel mixed emotions - rage for something that used to be so easy, horror for the bruising I’m obviously inflicting on my little boy and disappointment with confusion; how am I meant to do this differently? I don’t want to finding bruises regardless of why.

Does anyone have this problem? How do you stop them getting up too quickly/rolling it around?

I really feel for you. When DD was about ten weeks old I was carrying her with her head on my shoulder and my arm under her bum and she launched her head backwards and instead of using my hand to get her head/back, I grabbed her thigh so I didn't drop her and left perfect finger bruises all round her thigh. I felt dreadful! It is a wake up call that you need to be gentler and that they bruise super easily, but do what you can to make things easier. For me baby gros with zips etc really sped up the changing process or, given it's warmer now just do the nappy and he can move naked apart from nappy til he's ready to dress

I didn’t know this was a thing. My two seemed not to have a problem with nappy changes. They certainly never tried to run away halfway through! I always used warm water and cotton wool though, never those cold wet baby wipes, so maybe it didn’t upset them.
My toddler used to laugh when the baby did a mega shit - we used to shout together “Emergency botty bucket!” and rush to get the water. It was always a cheery game for them rather than a chore.

What are you wiping with? I found warm hand flannels a millions times easier and quicker than wet wipes. I got the job done a lot faster then.

Also I’d give them something to play with while I changed.

I find I have to be creative and use a different tactic every time. So sometimes blowing raspberries works, other times it's tickles, others it's singing, or pretending to sneeze, other times it's getting him to be grown up and help.

But yes sometimes I get the rage and shout "why do you have to make this so difficult" in exasperation whilst holding his ankles and wiping the shit away as quickly as I can.

I agree with PPs standing up changes or change on your knee if you can’t keep hold of him.

Two approaches to try
a) change the nappy on your lap. This was the only method when I was young. You can sort of pin them down gently with one arm and you can be really speedy
You need everything at hand in preparation

b) when you undress child keep tight/shorts/trousers around their ankles

Oh yes and sing a song very loudly while you change the nappy, do funny faces, be really daft! I make up a song about poo usually, laughing and being over the top to engage them.

And bribery, they can watch Puffin Rock/Paw Patrol/Bing, whatever works if they are very, very good.

Mines just coming up to 12 months and I get the same rage!! She's become a nightmare for wriggling and rolling if I ever want her to lie down on her back for a change or putting leggings on etc.
I'll be honest though, we've been trying potty training for poos for a couple of months and 9 times out of 10 she does her poos on the potty so there's very minimal mess to clean up while I'm putting a nappy on. Might be worth a go?
Then when she's wrestling me and flinging herself about for a change it's only a wee nappy so not catastrophic if she escapes 😂

Buy one of those big felt jesters hats and wear it while shaking the bells about during changes? (maybe just while at home)

Nice to know other people feel rage when changing toddler nappies. I was starting to think I had anger problems! I get so wound up. It will pass.

My first born was like that. It was horrifically difficult to change his nappy as he was a very angry, frustrated child all the time, what made it worse was people.assuming all I had to do was play some "fun" game with him and he'd be distracted enough to accept a nappy change. He just wasn't that kind of child.

Mine has been trying to roll away since about 6 months. It's only got worse, now he can walk etc. He always screams and tries to get away. I have to pin him down with my feet either side of him and give him a forbidden item. Tried standing up but he won't stay still.

The only time I ever smacked DD was when I was changing her nappy. I got so frustrated, I just snapped (I was diagnosed with PND a few weeks later). It just happened the once, but it left finger marks and I felt awful.

God knows why it was nappy changes that tipped me over the edge, but there was something about the tantrums during nappy changes that I couldn't deal with.

OP, you've been given some good advice, I hope some of it works. You will get through this very frustrating phase. (My wriggly/tantrummy/kicking DD is now a delightful 12yo!)

When my son was a toddler I used to change him standing up because of this. Until the day he darted away, I twisted to grab him and sprained a muscle in my back so badly I blacked out from the pain. Husband got home to find me unable to move and toddler still mid-nappy change. I had to be signed off work for a week and had a couple of months of physio. Am so glad to be out of the nappy years!

I change my 1 year old nappy by the sofa. She stands playing with the toys during the time I change her. She refused to be changed laying down since she was 9 months old.

There is so much good advice on here I’m definitely trying it all!

I do have a silly question - how do you clean babies bum hole properly if they’re standing? I can barely do it properly when he’s laying still, maybe the wipes I’m using? (Johnson’s gentle wipes)

It's easier when they're standing up.

That is a good question. When she is really dirty I take her to shower and stand her there or in the bath (I splash the water to help to clean). Sometimes I will clean as much as possible standing and quickly lay her down to clean the private parts (she is then gone in 10 seconds so I need to make sure that most is done standing).

One of our class teachers showed us how to do it on the floor. You sit next to them with o e o your legs over their chest (bent at the knee so not much pressure but they can't escape).

We used this with DS for a bit then switched to standing. I tell him to stick his bum out so I can wipe properly but he's 3 now and only has night nappies.

P.s. been there with the red rage too

I mastered the art of doing it as they stand. Mine would stand at the coffee table with something to eat or do...and I'd do it like that.

Bubble machine works wonders here

Re. how to clean them properly when they're standing...it's easy. Just do it. Get the wipe in there a couple of times. What's so hard about that?

Standing up

Wet wipes are great at getting all kinds of muck of walls, shoes etcz they are aggressive as hell. try loo paper, kitchen roll or a wet flannel, there is a good chance the wipes just sting

Bits of sellotape on his fingers. He picks them off and you change him.