Neighbours using road as their back garden...

[lovesamumbun]

So 6 months ago we moved into a a new build (shared ownership through a housing association). Our house is slightly set back off the road, 6 houses but not quite a cul de sac. And now the weather is getting nicer the neighbouring kids are coming out to play. Now I’m all for kids being kids but they are starting to treat it like an extension to their gardens. Around 13 kids, every night, screaming/shouting/kicking footballs at windows and cars until nearly 9 oclock. My 2 year olds bedroom is at the front of the house and it keeps him awake every night (when it’s not raining anyway!) Is there anything I can realistically do? I’ve had words with the parents and it just gets brushed off and they carry on. There is a park literally 30 steps from our houses. I’m losing the will to live. Not here for judgement, just need to know what on earth I can do!

but that's the kind of number that should be at the park, not creating a racket outside people's houses. really unfair.

I’d hazard a guess that at that time of the evening, they’ve been told to stay where their parents can see and hear them.

Mumsnet is such a weird place. It's like competitive nastiness.

OP, you're right. There is absolutely nothing lovely about swearing children who are kicking balls at windows and cars. Anyone who thinks that's delightful is a liar obviously just trying to prove how "hip and down with the kids" that they are.

Your child will be out there playing in a few years.

And maybe the OP will make sure her child is respectful of the neighbours' property and other children.

It is possible. (I live in a cul-de-sac)

There's not much you can do.

"I’d hazard a guess that at that time of the evening, they’ve been told to stay where their parents can see and hear them."

of course! I'm not blaming the children. I just don't understand why parents allow their DC to congregate in a large group and make a racket and disturb the neighbours.

It's very thought provoking. I often say on here I dream of leaving London and living in a house instead of a flat, but I think actually flats with no gardens might turn out to be quieter. Certainly after reading this I'll look at "cul de sac" or close very differently! Must have been lucky when I was growing up. Like OP said, we had a park very nearby, and if a whole group of us wanted to go, we had to find an adult to take us or we couldn't go.

Mumsnet is such a weird place. It's like competitive nastiness...OP, you're right. There is absolutely nothing lovely about swearing children who are kicking balls at windows and cars. Anyone who thinks that's delightful is a liar obviously just trying to prove how "hip and down with the kids" that they are.

Can you really not appreciate the difference between nastiness and differing opinions? Nobody has suggested that the OP should have to enjoy kids swearing and kicking balls at windows or cars or that that sort of behaviour is delightful, or even acceptable. Lots of people have given advice on how to stop it. I am most definitely not hip or down with the kids and have no problems with dealing with the kids in my neighbourhood if necessary. I just believe that letting them play outside is better for them than keeping them in gardens.

kids play and make noise, but kicking footballs into people's gardens, cars and windows is antisocial behaviour and lazy inconsiderate parenting.
If there is a park/play area so close, they should play there. Everybody should have an equal chance to live in peace, free from damage caused by other people's children.

@RosaWaiting (first time I’ve used that, it’s quite good!) I think that if there’s such a large group of kids, then most of the OP’s neighbours are going to have their own children out there and so it’s less bothersome for them.

I admit, I’m biased. I grew up on an estate with dozens of kids and we all used to knock around together, older siblings looking out for the younger ones. My childhood memories are wonderful. I live on an estate now and it’s not exactly a cul de sac but more of a dead end. As I look out of my window, I can see kids everywhere and it’s lovely. They’re safe, someone’s mum or dad is always keeping an eye on them and they’re all having a whale of a time together.

It's stopped raining for about 10 minutes this summer. Is this really happening often enough to be a huge issue?

If cars are actually getting damaged /at real risk of it then by all means have a word but I suspect you're being a bit precious. Honestly, in a few years when your child is older you'll have a different view of this.

Actually, quite a few people have implied that it's fine. It isn't. Only on Mumsnet.

Sn0t Lots of people have said how unreasonable OP is and how lovely having children playing out is. The majority of these posters have ignored the fact that her complaint is about shouting, swearing and kicking balls against cars and windows.

I grew up in a cul de sac like that. Loved playing outside with all the other kids. But looking back I can see that we terrorised the residents. Nobody told us not to and we were just kids. I remember the neighbours telling us off and we responded with rudeness, because our parents had told us our behaviour was ok and the neighbours were just misery guts. Obviously from an adult perspective I can see that our behaviour was unacceptable, but as a kid you have no idea. So I think in OP’s situation the parents are to blame and the kids are unlikely to listen unless the parents are on OP’s side.

Ugh it's like this where I live too OP. Even worse is, because they think it's their garden, they leave l their toys out. Bicycles, trikes, balls, mini football posts, all just left outside our houses. It looks a state. They leave balls and rubbish in people's front gardens, once a dirty child's tractor was left in our front garden for days, just picked it up and put it in the bin. The parents are at fault here they just let their kids do what they like, no respect for other people. Grumble over

Noise wise I think fine but the footballs against the windows not okay. I can’t believe people are describing it as lovely!
I used to play out on the road by our house and I have fond memories but we were told to keep the noise down if we were making too much noise later on and as for balls against windows - none of the residents would have put up with that.

There’s lovely playing out then there’s taking the piss if you ask me

Well a lot of you would hate me but I don’t think children playing in the street is acceptable. It is anti social to other residents, damages property and is dangerous as even in a cul de sac cars will be coming in and out of driveways.

If a child is old enough to play out then they should be in a park. If they are not old enough to be unsupervised they should be in their own gardens.

@Dontsweatthelittlestuff do you think adults should be allowed in the street or do they have to stick to garden or park too? What a weird world you live in

@Itwouldtakemuchmorethanthis

To be fair there's a difference between walking down the street and using it as a personal playground. I don't see how thinking the park is the place for football not the road is a weird idea at all.

I don’t know of any adults who actually want to play football in the street. My adult son actually has a full sized goal post which I keep on the side of my garden. He and a bunch of his mates carry it over to the park at least once a week and play football. Maybe I should suggest he pops it in the road and has a game there?
Or maybe outside your house?

I can’t comprehend people who think screaming and football noises are ‘lovely’, I can’t imagine what’s lovely about being made to listen to people screaming.

children have no more right to upset their neighbours than adults do. Get a grip - supervise your children and allow other adults the peace and tranquility they deserve. Allowing your kids to upset other people is antisocial.

Until 8pm or so yabu just like people doing diy, gardening etc is perfectly acceptable early evening. I would say after 9pm writing to the housing association is proportionate

do you think adults should be allowed in the street or do they have to stick to garden or park too? What a weird world you live in

Plenty of adults turn the street into a pub beer garden on summer evenings. Everyone dragging their chair out to have a right old 'laugh' with the neighbours late into the evening whilst their DC kick balls about. Friends of ours do this regularly throughout the summer.

Plenty of adults turn the street into a pub beer garden on summer evenings.

I've never seen anyone do this. The very obvious point here is that both adults and children are free to use the street in a way that doesn't disturb their neighbours. Shouting and screaming, kicking footballs into cars and windows, swearing, drunkenly brawling etc all disturb neighbours and is bloody antisocial whoever is doing it. (The only difference is that if it's kids doing it I'd blame the parents rather then the kids themselves).

Holes: I've never seen anyone do this.

Neither had I until I dropped something over to my friend's house and saw them all outside with their wine and snacks.
Depends on where you live obviously.

This used to happen in my street until a child got hit by a car. Luckily the driver had a dash cam.

It's still a road. I can never understand why some parents are so irresponsible by letting their children play in a road.