This is my most embarrassing moment ever.

[Lobsterquadrille2]

Tell me you've had worse. Walking home, the spoke of a man's umbrella knocked my wig off. Right by the traffic lights. Someone wound his window down to shout "I think you've dropped something, love".

Ok it seems funny now 😀

tilly, I think the poster was at her own house and the new friends had come round.

For me it was putting my pants on inside out which meant my panty liner was on the outside and not the inside. I only realised when I went down stairs and my husband and his friend were staring at my feet and the panty liner attached to the sole of my shoe.

Attending my late DGF's milestone birthday, swankiest restaurant in town, whole family there, but still only a quarter of the room filled by us. The rest was for other guests, including two of my classmates (I was 16). My 3 year old DB, an aspie, who was just potty trained, ran out of the restroom (no-one knew he went there), pants down, london&france on display, demanding of my mom to help him wipe his bum. According to my sister, I could have cheerfully posed as a traffic light then and there and nobody would have known the difference. Of course the story still gets aired at every family do, 17 years on...

Oh gosh that is funny op. Glad you saw funny side. A good sense of humour always helps!!
Mine was through vanity, I'm as blind as a bat (i know they're not actually blind) thought i would go out without my glasses one night. I'm so short sighted though and what I thought was someone in front of me who I kept side stepping to allow past and was saying to them 'excuse me' turned out it was actually a mirror!! My friend was the DJ at the time who thought I was practicing some new dance moves😂. That was the one and only time I went out without them or contacts in again.

OMG tillytoodles1 I'm laughing myself silly here at the idea of someone taking lube,a blindfold,3 vibrators and wrist restraints round to anyone's house,let alone someone they barely knew!

I have two identical pairs of leggings (goth, very specially gorgeous with lace and straps etc), but this is because I love them, and one pair went really threadbare at the back seam - and the threadbareness is spreading. So I bought a new pair and still wear the threadbare pair with short dresses.

Only two days ago I realised I was out on the town in the threadbare pair (with a t-shirt) by mistake. Sat on the loo in a nightclub. And wearing a thong.

Had to brazen it out. Like as if I knew everyone could see my arse crack and I didn't care. I'm 54. I care

This thread has taught me to never wear white linen trousers. Hilarious! 🤣🤣🤣

Trying on a dress in M&S and the zip stuck. I tried to undo it but no luck so, as I was on my own I went out to discreetly ask for help. I explained what had happened and the assistant called someone else over and they proceeded to have a discussion on how to get me out of the dress. They eventually decided on scissors but then realised they didn't have any so phoned up to menswear for a pair to be brought down. I was eventually cut free in front of everyone in the queue and I shuffled back to the cubicle to change.

It was then I realised that not only had I got myself stuck, but the dress was on back to front!

I've had worse, I realised mid-shower on first day at new gym that I was in the wrong changing room and ran out in my towel. Thought I was going to die of embarrassment and spent weeks waiting to be arrested.

My most embarassing one was when I went to a party and one of my uni lecturers was there, some friend of a friend of the host. Anyway. I got obscenely drunk, fell on top of him in my drunken state, had the most cringy conversation with him about sexual conquests (all one sided, mine that is) and then he saw me throw up in a flowerpot at the front of the venue. I still want to die whenever I think of it and still, 15 years later, have avsolutely no idea why I started that conversation with him, I didn't fancy him and he was old. Ugh I literally feel ill just recounting it.

My DF's most embarassing moment ever was when we were on a train and he stood up before it stopped. I'm sure you can see where this is heading. He ended up in the lap of a very muscly man, with his arm practically round his neck. I couldn't stop laughing and I have never, before nor since, seen my DF such a fetching shade of red.

Bluntness100 snorting with laughter at your glass smash story 😂

Today: leaving work at lunchtime, I was heading down the stairs to the basement car park, when a sneaky stealth fart slipped out. It was doubly sneaky - it absolutely stunk, as though a very stinky thing had crept up my arse and died some weeks earlier.

I yanked open the door at the bottom of the stairs, just in time to save the chief exec the trouble of pressing the numbers on the keypad to get in.

He will have walked up those stairs. He will have smelt that awful fart.

And he will know it was MINE ...

I'm blushing, just thinking about it. I hope I don't see him for several months, by which time my mortification about The Fart will have been replaced by embarrassment at the several embarrassing things I will have done in the meantime.

posh work do. huge venue. got drunk. left it very late for wee so had to dash across the enormous venue, cross-legged in very high heels, weaving all over, in a fast, inelegant and desperate trot. fell into the Ladies loo only to be told that my breast had fallen right out of my halter neck top and had been merrily bouncing along half topless as I ran past my (mostly male) colleagues . all 2000 of them . I am a profeshional woman you know. and classy.

@lakie . that's brilliant and I'm in stitches. Once did one of those in a lift, which is wrong on many levels

I had a very embarrassing moment once when I lived in my previous house. It had a lovely big garden, which was completely screened with tall trees and hedges and no one couid see in.
Soo, I was sunbathing on the lawn and decided it’d be really silly to have tan lines, given the fact the garden was un overlooked. I didn’t give it a second thought as I whipped my bikini off.
I put in my headphones and started to soak up some rays, when I had the sense of someone watching me. I sat up and looked around and didn’t see my one so iayed down again. But a few minutes later when I still had the feeling I was being watched i sat up again, this time a mans voice piped up.
‘Nice day for it love!’
It was coming from too of the roof of the property next door, where I saw a middle aged builder was grinning down at me. He was replacing a loose tile apparently.
I’ve never been so embarrassed in my life !

oh just seen the panty liner one and it reminded me.....on a work trip to India with lovely very polite male colleague.

He came into my hotel room for us to work on a presentation. he sat on the bed (it was a small room) and absentmindedly picked up a tissue that was on the bed next to him. But it wasn't a tissue. it was a rogue (used ) panty liner that had got stuck on the bed (god knows how but in my defence I was very jet lagged).

he handed it to me 'i think this is yours'. 'thanks, it is' i replied. we never spoke of it again. he probably thinks I'm the biggest slattern ever.

Love this thread

I am very clumsy so a lot of falling over stuff happens to me, or at least it used to when I was in my teens and 20s.

In one week at uni I managed to:

1. Run round the corner to our uni corner shop and fall flat on my face having taken the corner too sharply. Shop was on main road into town and heaving with tourists at the time. Only saving grace was none could speak English to ask if I was ok.

2 . Again running round a bend this time back to our student house, just slid over to one side. End up on the floor to the bemusement of 3 of my housemates who were stood on the doorstep wondering how I'd fallen over on a flat surface.

1. In our uni dining hall we sat on very long wooden benches which you couldn't really move, you just sort of stepped over to get in and out. Despite having done this many times a week for nearly 2 years, in the same week I went to get up and basically forgot to move my legs, so I ended up sliding back off the bench ending up on my back with my legs in the air.

Another one...I had very pale legs and before the advent of St Tropez was shit at fake tan so ALWAYS wore tights or stockings. The tights were the thick top ones so I never wore knickers with them.

So one night I'm at a local club. The sort of club where they let you take drinks on the (shiny, slippery) dance floor. I was jumping around to Jump Around, as you do, when my massive platforms (this was mid 1990s) connected with an empty bottle, I slipped and fell. Bad enough except as well as the whole bottle the floor was also covered in broken glass. I jumped up off the floor shouting I was fine, only for my friends to be looking at me shocked minutes later, as my leg was red from knee to ankle. I'd cut my leg on the broken glass and was bleeding profusely.

Went to the loo and took off tights which were bloody and shredded. So now I'm commando, in a short lacy mini dress. This is ok I think so long as I don't sit down or bend over else it will all be on show....

Emerge from loo, club bouncer (who I kind of know and have a bit of a thing for) says he needs to dress it as the first aider...end up going back into loo, fishing tights out of bin (boak), ripping off both tight legs and wearing top part as pants. Get leg dressed and end up with massive bandage round as cut is too big for plasters, and still bleeding. On reflection I should have gone to A&E...

My mum yelled at my little brother to come back when he ran ahead in the street, her false teeth flew out and landed further up the pavement.

When DH was still a fairly new boyfriend we were walking back to my flat after dinner and drinks. We bumped into my uncle who was absolutely shitfaced outside a bar and as he went to introduce himself to DH, he spat his false teeth out. After struggling for a few moments to get them comfortably back in place he gave up, tucked them in his breast pocket and continued the conversation.

That was the first dealings DH ever had with my family and I can't believe he stuck around after that

I also talk to myself a lot and sing little made up songs when I'm in the loo. Think I started doing this when my DC were little to encourage/ entertain thrm. So I now find myself doing it randomly at home and work too. Which is fine except when I forget to check t work if I'm alone before I start singing a little ditty like 'badada, doing a big wee ' and someone in the next cubicle coughs....

A friend of mine got very drunk at a nightclub and was sick in the loos.
When she went to the sink to wash her hands she looked in the mirror and noticed that her two front false teeth had also been flushed down the loo with the vomit.
She was distraught at the time but thinks its a very funny story now.

I work on a very large outdoor site and have to make sure meetings are scheduled with enough time to get across site. One of the meetings ran over and I had a few minutes to make it to the next one so I grabbed a bike and set off, forgetting that it's uphill most of the way I was heading.
I pulled up outside our main office which has lots of large windows and everyone spots who is arriving and as I stepped off the bike my legs completely collapsed and I had to do a weird wobbly walk to the front of the building.
Lots of coworkers asked me later if I was ok

Left a used tampon on the side of the bath yesterday when I got in the shower. Forgot it was there and DP found it 😳 He said 'thanks for the flower you left me.. But I don't really like tulips'

Fucking mortified.

17 year old me. Cheap B & B in Blackpool. Shower has slim, floor length window with blind. The blind decides to fall off the window and refuses to go back on, I'm in this tight space facing onto busy streets holding up the blind to hide my nakedness. I face the dilemma of either standing there for the rest of my life, or letting it fall and clumsily trying to exit knowing I will be seen... If you're ever in Blackpool could you please pop round with a towel?

One of my embarrassing stories was desperate for a pee whilst driving on M25. Pulled into the services, got out of the car to rush to the facilities and my hold up stockings started rolling down lower than the hem of my skirt. I found a wall to sit on to try and sort them out but as soon as I stood up again, they rolled down again. I ran with my keys in my mouth holding on to the tops of the bloody stockings at the sides of my skirt. There was a bloody coach load of pensioners queued in the loos so I had to just step out of them rather than them pooling round my ankles.