To think that Hypnobirthing is a load of crap

[Poppy1774]

Just that really. I did all the affirmations, breathing exercises, meditation, etc. In the end needed lots of intervention for the safety of me and my baby (and we were both healthy afterwards, thank goodness).
However I felt disappointed with my 'birth experience'. I wish I had never heard of hypnobirthing. If I hadn't, I'd have accepted what happened much more quickly. I wasn't naive about childbirth - I knew that things could go wrong. Yet somehow hypnobirthing got into my head and made me feel that intervention = bad = failure. I wasn't positive enough/calm enough etc. Difficult to be positive and calm when in absolute agony and baby in distress.
Two of my friends have also had the same reaction after births that did not involve breathing a baby out in a birthing pool.
I feel hypnobirthing is not just nonsense, it is also actually damaging to women's self-esteem after birth.
And before you tell me it helped with your second birth after a difficult first birth...second labours are often easier!
Rant over. Thoughts?

Hypnobirthing doesn't mean an intervention free birth. It means accepting support when you are ready and need to rather than having a medicalised birth straight from the off even when you haven't consented to it. It's about coping and being confident in your body and your decisions, whatever they are.

I’m also another person who’s instructor pooh-poohed the idea of any of us needing interventions.

One woman mentioned she was fearful of needing extra help, and a few of us nodded in agreement. She essentially said “don’t worry, you won’t- you’re all low risk.”

Now I’m not a midwife, but looking at the demographic of that room of 10 women, 8 of whole were first timers and all of us in our 30s, there was a fairly high chance at least one of us was going to need some kind of intervention.

If that’s what women are being told, not wonder they feel like they’ve failed when they don’t end up breathing a baby out on a birthing ball in a cosy mlu.

The course I went on was one arranged by my local hospital and it was about knowing what to expect and how to keep yourself calm whatever birth you ended up having.

Whilst mine isn’t a horror story, I never had a show, my waters never went and my contractions went from nothing to very intense within an hour, so as you can imagine I was panicking that something was wrong but it was my DH reminding me to do the breathing techniques we’d learnt that helped me regain my composure.

Thankfully I had a straight forward delivery... But... I put that down to luck more than anything else! There was nothing I did that made my delivery the way it was, and there is nothing you did to make your delivery the way it was, we can’t control nature. The hypnobirthing just helped me remain calm to enjoy the experience a bit better, if you can ever enjoy birthing a baby!

My hypnobirthinh experience meant I didn’t need pain relief

But I still ended up in EMCS and obviously then had to be put under with paint relief

However, for the first 24 hours the nurses were impressed with what pain I was able to take

Thanks for all the replies everyone.
I am sure some instructors are good at explaining how it can keep you calm in all eventualities.
However there is too much out there on social media suggesting that if you just think positively enough etc you can avoid 'unnecessary medical intervention'. This phrase really irritates me now.
I know so many friends who are disappointed with their birth experience. Yet all of them were well and up on their feet within a week of giving birth, and had healthy babies. They grew and birthed a human - yet feel that they've failed. It makes my blood boil.

I did hypnobirthing. I planned a calm, drug free birth but ended up having to have an induction and epidural.

I don’t consider myself a “failure” at all. The hypnobirthing helped to keep me calm and focussed and relaxed, which is the whole point of it.

A good hypnobirthing teacher should never make you feel like a failure for not having a natural, drug free birth. It’s all about staying calm and in control, regardless of what happens and how far you deviate from your plan.

The attitude I have towards birth and the advice I would give to anybody is “hope for the best, prepare for the worst.” There’s nothing wrong with planning a calm birth, in a pool, with no pain relief or whatever you want. But be fully prepared and accepting that there is a very good chance that this might not happen. As long as you are accepting of this, you’ll take it all in your stride and stay calm.

I never felt that hypnobirthing was sold to me as a promise of an intervention free birth. The online course I followed, I felt, really emphasised how to use the techniques to support you in whichever way labour took you, including instrumental deliveries and c-sections.

I didn’t go all out with the visualisations and massage but the breathing and affirmations did help me hugely. The midwife was quite surprised when I was examined to see how dilated I was and I gave birth 3 hours after arriving at the hospital - it was my first time giving birth. There will of course have been many other factors at play which contributed toward me having a straight forward labour but I do genuinely believe that hypnobirthing helped me, particularly as it kept me calm - well, at least until I reached transition.

It worked for me but I didn’t see interventions as a failure. I had a very good independent midwife who helped “coach” me in the run up to childbirth.

It taught me to really listen to my body - and that included being in a safe place for birth (no bright lights and minimal “hassling”, plus the importance of staying in a comfortable position)

My birth wasn’t perfect, I had stitches and lost a lot of blood but I felt relatively happy about it. The experience in a post natal ward was however horrific for me.

I thought it was great. There's only so much it can do though, obviously. It's probably not for everyone.

Like anything it depends how you interpret it.
I spent most of my pregnancy reading up and practicing techniques, in all the research I did nowhere did it say “if you don’t have a natural birth, in a birthing pool at home, you’re a failure”....
What it taught me was how to advocate for myself and baby and to know the difference between essential medical interventions and things which are protocol but in no way essential.
I had an induction, all the drugs, all the monitoring and an assisted delivery in stirrups. I never felt like a failure, my techniques helped me manage the contractions and it kept me calm throughout, even when things went a bit wrong.
I think you’ve either had a bad teacher or you’ve approached it as a guarantee to an amazing experience. It is simply a tool, like regular meditation for example, meditating can help you deal with stressful times in life but it doesn’t stop them happening.

I’m sorry you didn’t get the benefit, lots of women do but nothing is “one size fits all” in life.

It helped me. I'm an anxious person by nature so it helped me feel in control- in particular pushing the pain away made it more manageable.

The only positive for me is that it gave me.confidence in pregnancy that labour would be fine and I was more prepared and less anxious. But as soon as the 'surges' come you realise it's a load of old crap and that the breathing technique does fuck all. If I have a second then I will have an elective c section.

Also, anyone who accepts a few pretty “positive thinking” memes on social media as a technique....
No. Proper reading, research and a teacher who is recommended or well reviewed.

And having had done it for number one I would 100% do it again for number 2 despite number 1 being EMCS

Yes, I will say that even though it did sweet FA for me in labour past the first hour or so, it did make me less anxious about giving birth during pregnancy so perhaps that was worth it after all.
But if anyone asks for my advice on childbirth now - take the drugs

I'm sorry to hear of your experience.

In no way would I associate intervention=bad.

The emphasis for the one i listened to was on listening to what felt right for you and your baby. If intervention was necessary, then so be it.

Nothing went to plan for my birth but it was relatively straightforward. The breathing techniques helped me with early labour. The meditation helped me bond with my son well before birth.

I had plenty of pain relief and had plenty of help.

I think the key is to take it with a bit of a pinch of salt but utilise the techniques you practice wherever you can.

Again, so sorry for your experience. No one should ever be made to feel a failure for needing help. Ever.

It worked for me - induction with a propess as my waters went without contractions. All the practice lying on my back deep breathing meant the midwives didn't believe I was in active labour so I had to lie and say I couldn't feel movement, at which point they examined me and shot me down to the labour ward, bed and all. It helped me push and to not panic when they told me I needed an episiotomy. I used Tens and a bit of G&A.

Sorry but anyone going on about hypnobirthing just makes me inwardly laugh- what a load of crap, it usually tends to be first time mothers telling us all how they are going to have the perfect birth.

FWIW I did have two easy births. This was fuck all to do with hypnobirthing or any other shite and nothing to do with me- it was simply just very good luck.

Shrug, I did it twice with great effect. I still use the techniques to relax now.

I went in to both births planning to use hypnosis but happy to roll with drugs/medical intervention if needed.

I think it's amazing. My first birth didn't go to plan and I needed an epidural but hypnobirthing meant I never panicked at all. My second labour was more straightforward and it helped immensely.

H really bought into it too and whereas he is usually a panicker he was brilliant for both labours.

I found it helpful. I was far more positive and excited in the run up to labour than any of my new NCT friends. I had a straight forward first labour with no pain relief or intervention.

I really wanted a water birth (fuck all to do with hypnobirthing - I love swimming and water sports, grew up by the sea, went to sit on the beach immediately after my IVF blastocyst transfer, swam almost every day during pregnancy...) midwife said she wouldn’t say no, but I had some bleeding and they’d be happier being able to keep an eye on that without the water. I agreed and felt nothing negative about that. It’s not in my personality to feel I’ve failed over something like that.

I had another group other than NCT - people I met doing aqua natal. 2 of 10 of us did hypnobirthing. We both arrived at the hospital 9cm dilated with the midwives saying we’d come in too early as our contractions weren’t painful enough. I’d been told by NCT that if you can talk through a contraction, they won’t let you come in. I did a ridiculous pantomime on the phone pretending I couldn’t speak.

I think that I would always have had a straightforward birth - but I do think that hypnobirthing helped me look forward to it.

My sister also did hypnobirthing and then had an EMCS. She said that she used techniques whilst she was waiting to go in for the CS, and they helped a lot. She had no negative feelings about it. She’s a doctor and though not an obstetrician attended many labours early in her career and had a very realistic view of labour.

We both just don’t have the kind of personalities to beat ourselves up about how things went.

I think the trick is not to get caught up in thinking hypnobirthing can control the type of birth you have.
I think it's just supposed to be useful in terms of your frame of mind and dealing with pain, it's not supposed to magically give you a pain free waterbirth.
I did some hypnobirthing but only with books and CDs, wasn't willing to spend megabucks on a course. But I also refused to write a birth plan because I knew I WANTED a straightforward water birth but you can't decide these things, and was willing to accept any intervention/surgery whatever was needed and not feel like I'd 'failed' (so daft, none of us should ever feel that way!)
I was lucky and the birth was straightforward and some hypnobirthing stuff helped me and some of it I forgot about completely 😂

Looking back now, I think the midwife I had for Hypnobirthing had a Crazy agenda that basically said all interventions are wrong and you shouldn’t need any. She was quite forceful.
However, I took her with a pinch of salt & the techniques helped me along during labour but I was also prepared to see how I got on & take drugs if I needed it. Id say she was twitching at home when I asked for the epidural !

Hypnobirthing really helped me but mainly in terms of teaching me techniques to try to stay as calm and relaxed as possible. That's easier said than done if things don't go to plan and I ended up with a relentless back to back labour and assisted delivery but anything that makes you feel calmer and more confident going into and during labour is great. I suppose it depends on how it is delivered but everything I learned in hypnobirthing was about how to cope with your birth no matter how things go, interventions or not. I didn't do a course but watched loads of YouTube videos, including the positive birth company free content and listened to Spotify tracks. If nothing else, doing some daily meditation during pregnancy meant I got a bit of a rest!

I disagree. Yes, I used it in my second birth, and yes it was an amazing empowering experience. In fact, I had a completely drug free, water, home birth. I did have a second degree tear however so not perfect. I have absolutely no doubt in my mind though that hypnobirthing made a huge impact on my experience. I used quite a few of the techniques I learned, and without them I wouldn't have managed to stay so calm and in control. That doesn't mean I think I would have had interventions without it, and the result of healthy mum and baby would probably have been the exact sanet, just that the experience wouldn't have been as positive, and that was my main goal.

From reading the thread I think there's clearly a difference with what exactly each course is saying, and what women are expecting from hypnobirthing, as some of the accounts here really don't align with my experience of learning and using hypnobirthing.