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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask you to share your unexpected menopause symptoms

271 replies

GraceMarks · 15/06/2019 10:46

I've been perimenopausal for about a year now, and I thought I was pretty well-read about what it would involve. But some of the things I've experienced have come as a particularly unpleasant surprise and I was wondering if others had found the same! Perhaps if we share some of the things we've been through it will help other women to be prepared when they reach that time in their lives too.

So, aside from the usual hot flushes and night sweats and irregular periods, I've had:

Ovulation flu! I don't have a better term for it really, but every time I ovulate now, I get weird flu-like symptoms such as aching muscles, swollen neck glands, and suddenly feeling cold and tired all the time. It took me a while to make the connection with the time of the month, and I thought I was just getting a bit of a cold, but it only ever lasts for a couple of days and then goes away completely.

The fatigue. Even after getting what seems to be enough sleep.

Weirdly, the lower back pain I've suffered with for more than a decade has more or less gone, but now I get joint pain in my knees and elbows instead. It's much worse a couple of days before a period.

Anyone else had any symptoms they didn't expect, and did they go away once you were completely through the menopause?

OP posts:
diaduittoyou · 15/06/2019 18:06

I'm 38 and experiencing so many of these symptoms. I have other Gynae issues though and am unsure what might be peri-menopause and what might be caused by other issues.....

Btw - peri menopause is not diagnosed by low estrogen as levels will fluctuate during the peri years, I believe.

Zoflorabore · 15/06/2019 18:06

Sorry left leg! And brain fog clearly....

MidsomerBurgers · 15/06/2019 18:10

Forgetting words.

Diemme · 15/06/2019 18:10

Achey joints! Felt I'd aged 30 years, could hardly walk at times. trevor wtf is javelin arse? Grin

PutyourtoponTrevor · 15/06/2019 18:11

Weird isn't it, losing body hair but gaining whiskers on our chin

PutyourtoponTrevor · 15/06/2019 18:14

Diemme it feels like someone has shoved a javelin up yer bum, like a sharp stabbing pain. Never had it when I was younger but since hitting my mid 40s it's agony. Only lasts a couple of minutes but boy, do you know about it. The first time it happened I sort of sharply curled into a ball in bed, and kneed DP in the pods 😁

Oh, and shits. Let's not forget the shits

joystir59 · 15/06/2019 18:25

bladder sensitivity heightened by hormonal fluctuations. Drove me mad for years and drove up profits for Tena

Teenageromance · 15/06/2019 18:26

Havent read the whole thread but has anyone else developed blushing? I have and I hate it. In a meeting if the attention is on me I feel like I turn beetroot!

NoYo · 15/06/2019 18:33

Has anyone else experienced really vivid, lucid dreams? Especially during my period. Also strange dreams about being pregnant - I'm definitely not btw Grin

sadeyedladyofthelowlands63 · 15/06/2019 18:39

The itching. The terrible awful itching.
This! I have been very lucky not to really have any of the other usual symptoms (apart from night sweats), but the itching is unbearable. I have actually woken up to discover I have drawn blood from scratching. I had never heard/read of this being a symptom and it is driving me INSANE!

tomboytown · 15/06/2019 18:59

Really gone off alcohol
I used to drink most days, now I couldn’t care less.
Eating too...absolutely no joy from food, but that just means I eat anything that’s in the fridge, I don’t cook or prepare anything
Actually my life has been sucked dry of any joy at sll

PinPon · 15/06/2019 19:11

Totally recognise the sharp stabbing pain that’s been described as ‘javelin arse’ upthread. Didn’t even consider that it could be menopause-related!

Does anyone know where to get reliable info on the menopause, symptoms and what to do about them?

user1479305498 · 15/06/2019 19:18

Absolutely chronic itching down below, no one else mentions this they just say itching, but for me it was really, really specific , 57 now and this started about 9 years ago. Stiff ankles and feet when I get up for 20 mins. General achiness , tire a lot easier, whiskers on chin, hair loss on eyebrows and eyelashes, find really hot weather hard to tolerate, hot hands all the time. No sex drive at all , and fin I am really irritated even by the thoughts of it, basically it's pretty shit. I would try HRT but think I am actually now through the worst of it as such (don't get the night sweats thing anymore or that internal heat thing)

RandomMess · 15/06/2019 19:23

Menopausematters is a decent UK website.

MyFavouritePlace · 15/06/2019 19:34

For me it's really bad BO and the brain fog is awful. I really struggle with names.
I've also lost my sense of taste, find I am eating very spicy food to get some flavour.

PinPon · 15/06/2019 19:40

Thanks @RandomMess.

Other unexpected symptoms include hair loss (from head) - hair is definitely less full.

The joy!

GraceMarks · 15/06/2019 19:42

Oldraver ah, I see. We're told expect "dryness" but nobody has ever said anything about an unstoppable, knicker-gluing tide. Typical male doctor reaction!

Zoflorabore I'm 40. I started with all this shortly after I turned 39. My mum went through hers very early, so I was expecting the same - probably just as well, or I would be thinking my body had just gone fucking mental.

Javelin arse!! I've had that and didn't realise it had anything to do with menopause. I thought I was having sympathy pains with Edward II for some reason.

OP posts:
RandomMess · 15/06/2019 19:43

I'm def early peri menopause and def the supplements I'm taking are massively helping but I know once I shift into menopause they are unlikely to help Sad

Pipandmum · 15/06/2019 19:44

That I have none. My periods have just stopped after getting increasingly irregular for a couple years. I’m 57 and think my last was 6-8 months ago.

Ursaminor · 15/06/2019 19:52

Ladies - may I give you some hope?
I remember a lot of these symptoms - brain fog, boob pain, fatigue amongst a few. But I am now 57 and have never felt better. I know everyone experiences menopause differently, but can I just say that it may be that all these annoyances will go away in time. I do have a slightly arthritic ache in my foot and have to rid my chin of hair from time to time, but it's nothing like the misery of the late 40s / early 50s.

Drum2018 · 15/06/2019 19:58

I'm experiencing loads of the symptoms listed already -
Lack of sleep, no sweating but feeling overheated, bastard boobs get so sore and feel like large melons but I'm flat as fried eggs (or as Dh used to say, 2 disprins on an ironing board), restless legs, ovulation pain/bloating/river of discharge, brain fog, palpitations, ... list goes on. Told Dh at this stage I could actually have a terminal illness but I'm putting every symptom down to peri menopause. And my attitude has really taken a turn for the worse - it's a 'fuck that/fuck you/fuck off' attitude. Maybe I shouldn't have read The Life Changing Magic of Not Giving a Fuck, which was recommended on MN Grin

Drum2018 · 15/06/2019 20:04

NoYo yes to the vivid dreams. I feel like I've lived the dreams and am wrecked in the mornings.

ContinuityError · 15/06/2019 20:07

I need to get a t shirt printed up with this:

To ask you to share your unexpected menopause symptoms
Treefloof · 15/06/2019 20:14

Has anyone else experienced really vivid, lucid dreams?
Yes and for years and years I didn't remember any dreams, now they are vivid and memorable and vvv strange.

Does anyone know where to get reliable info on the menopause symptoms and what to do about them?
I wish, there is menopause matters, but most stuff I Google and it maybe has a link to some menopause forum or question answered, the more unusual stuff I end up thinking I must have brain cancer or sonething9.
I suspect this is because it's a woman only thing and no money or prestige in looking at it.

GraceMarks · 15/06/2019 20:19

Oh yes, vivid dreams as well, but I've always had those. Recently they've developed subplots and multiple settings.

I have been getting a very strong, intrusive heartbeat but it's not irregular. Is that palpitations?

The attitude problem I can understand. Just lately at work, I've become infuriated by people who don't read my emails and then come and ask me stupid questions that they would have known the answers to if they'd read the sodding emails. Before, I would have patiently answered them and pasted on a smile, now I just say "Look in your inbox. There'll be something in there that you'll find surprisingly helpful."

OP posts: