To think he didn't need to charge me

[memorial]

Yesterday I travelled from Cardiff to London for a birthday treat to see Hugh Jackman bought for me by my sister.
I bought my train tickets in advance at £50.
We had a wonderful time though the £20 train ticket back to my sister's house was galling. And again this morning back to London.
I left my sister's house in plenty of time (according to TFL planner). But of course the train was stuck at a red light for 10/15 mins and the tubes were awfully slow.
I raced into the station just to see the train doors closing. Never mind I think it's super off peak midweek I'll get the next train in half an hour.
So I do. Scan my ticket at the gates and settle down for the journey. A busy but not full train with no seat reservations.
About 10 mins in a rather brusque ticket collector comes round. I show him my ticket and he gets quite aggressive loudly telling me I need to buy a ticket. I am genuinely gobsmacked and explain what happened.
He points out (rudely and very loudly) that my ticket was an advance single and only valid on the train I missed.
I am very apologetic and say I usually buy a super off peak and didn't even realise this and again explain how I just missed the train.
He again very loudly and rudely says I can buy a ticket or get off with a fine. He really is talking to me like I am a criminal fare dodger.
So I pay another £50 close to tears. What a horrible end to a lovely birthday treat.
So while I accept that my ticket wasn't valid, did he really need to be so rude and aggressive and surely he could have used a bit of discretion. I clearly wasn't trying to take the piss.
Feeling really sad and disappointed. Have spent £140 on train tickets plus tube and feel like a naughty school child.

And everyone jumping on my description of myself. It was not to garner sympathy or insist on middle class entitlement. It was to try and draw a picture of how very non threatening I am so no need to start shouting at me. And yes he did shout in a rather aggressive manner before I even opened my mouth

Greyt. Please point out where I said I didn't need to pay again because I was a middle class middle aged professional. Utter nonsense. I was painting a picture of the situation.
As it is I can easily afford it and had a card to pay for it. I would worry about those less able and more vulnerable than me. My daughter and mother (sadly passed away recently just in case anyone goes digging previous posts) would not have been able to and no doubt would have been thrown off and treated rather badly by this bully. I don't think anyone should have been charged again. And certainly would be a problem for many in this country. It's not actually about the money as I think would seen clear from my OP.

But she did buy a ticket. The train company took her money to transport her from A to B

Yes, but it was invalid on the journey she actually got. Should have checked the ticket, then worked it out with the ticket office before boarding.

OP, this is the internet where people tend to lie and exaggerate. Your perception may have been that he was rude, i'll chose to take that with a pinch of salt because of your "middle class" comment.
Your post is also titled "To think he didn't need to charge me" You initially complained because you felt you shouldn't have been charged. Why are you now saying you agree you should have been charged?

Please point out where I said I didn't need to pay again because I was a middle class middle aged professional.

OK then, why is your thread titled *To think he didnt need to charge me"? and then what was your point in adding this:
I am a middle class frumpy professional.

I don't actually. But as this is AIBU, I will accept that perhaps IABU to expect this.
You can think you're lying all you like. Personally I think that's a very sad and cynical way to live your life. Not sure what you think I get from it. I don't usually complain about people's attitudes dealing with people every day who can often be very rude. This man's behaviour was not acceptable. Maybe a different thread. Though you seen sure I am lying. Perhaps my middl3 class comment has raised your heckles and large shoulder chip. Something to reflect on.
FWIW my profession is one with quite a strict moral/honest code so no I'm not a liar.

Perhaps my middl3 class comment has raised your heckles and large shoulder chip. Something to reflect on.
FWIW my profession is one with quite a strict moral/honest code so no I'm not a liar.

You know what does raise people's heckles? Banging on about how middle class you are, expecting special treatment because of it, and assuming that anyone who doesn't agree with you is just jealous of how middle class you are. Terribly well done on being a professional .

You know what does raise people's heckles? Banging on about how middle class you are, expecting special treatment because of it, and assuming that anyone who doesn't agree with you is just jealous of how middle class you are. Terribly well done on being a professional hmm.

This. You are constantly mentioning you middle class. No, I don't have any "jealousy" towards you, actually i'm also considered "middle class" but I also don't expect to get special treatment because of it.

Not sure what you think I get from it.
Well, sympathy for one

No I mentioned it once. It's those with giant chips on their shoulders who keep bringing it up.
As I have explained numerous times. I mentioned to describe myself and the situation. Not that I personally didn't expect to pay but everyone else should. Where on earth did I say that. I wouldn't think 8t fair if he charged anyone of any race/class/colour/creed in the same situation. But that's ok keep in judging.

Sympathy from AIBU?? You are kidding right? Trust me I've been around mumsnet long enough to know this was one place guaranteed not to get sympathy

Taking trains is so stressful nowadays and it shouldn’t be. I am trying to use the train rather than drive as it’s better for the environment. Had to go to a conference in London and was taking the toddler as there was a crèche (no space at her usual nursery at home as not my usual workday). Employer very kindly stumped up for first class but it was an advance ticket. Very excited for my fancy breakfast train!

Was taking first bus of the morning from my home to the station. Should have had 20mins to get on the train. Bus was late, train early . Sprinted carrying toddler along with about 10 other people up and over the footbridge for the train. Train left the second it’s due time came on.One chap made it. They waved it off despite seeing a load of people running.

Asked if I could get next train with my ticket which cost over a hundred pounds . Told no and then told I didn’t have a valid ticket so needed to get off platform as it was a penally fare area and I would be fined! Spent another hundred pounds buying a standard ticket for the next service and then had to stand in vestibule on packed train with toddler for 2hours. At least I had packed snacks for toddler as we didn’t get our breakfast.

All in all not a nice experience. This is why people drive in the UK.

Not that I personally didn't expect to pay but everyone else should.

What do you think discretion means? You accept that usually someone in your situation would have to pay but wanted him not to charge you on this particular occasion because your reasons were special.

If you're a professional surely you understand that charging people, yes even people "like you", is literally his job.

No I mentioned it once. It's those with giant chips on their shoulders who keep bringing it up.

No, you keep assuming people who bring it up have these chips on their shoulders. You keep assuming we must be jealous. That's all you. Why on earth did you feel the need to use that way to describe yourself? Is it only working class people who try to use invalid tickets, in you opinion? By referring to yourself as middle class as a description, you come across as a judgmental, class focused person. That's why we keep mentioning it.

Not that I personally didn't expect to pay but everyone else should.

Then why did you title your post "To think he didn't need to charge me"?

Also this is bollocks "It's those with giant chips on their shoulders who keep bringing it up."

People keep bringing it up because it's massively indicative of your sense of entitlement. Not because they're jealous of you .

I too am a middle class professional. I just don't think it has any baring on the treatment I deserve from train conductors.

@PCohle completely agree with what you are saying. Eh, just another one of these:

OP: AIBU
MN: Yes
OP: No, i'm not because I'm middle class!

Completely agree.

He was within his rights but didn't have to be so loud about it, embarrassing you in public. He also didn't have to stick to the letter of the law.

Christ, the poison on this thread. It’s disturbing.

I disagree with most of the other posters, there was no need for him to be so rude and aggressive.

Asking you to pay for a new ticket was a discretionary option because he could have instead reported you for prosecution, taken your details and sent off a witness statement so that his company could take you to court. Would you have preferred that? The railway bylaws are strict liability offences, meaning that you nothing in your OP would be a defence to not holding a valid ticket.

Also you obviously feel ‘hard done by’ which will mean that your account of his conduct will be biased. I personally doubt that he was as rude and aggressive as you say, it sounds more like an exaggeration as you are just pissed he didn’t let you stay on the train without paying for a valid ticket.

Also you obviously feel ‘hard done by’ which will mean that your account of his conduct will be biased. I personally doubt that he was as rude and aggressive as you say, it sounds more like an exaggeration as you are just pissed he didn’t let you stay on the train without paying for a valid ticket.

Exactly what i think too, lhastingsmua

If you miss your train, even an advance single, due to a connecting service being delayed then you can get on the next available train and your ticket will still be valid. So if the first train was delayed by 15 mins then I would 100% try to recoup this.

Obviously doesn't count if you simply miss a train, it has to be due to a connecting train or tube delay.

I was once charged for a genuine mistake (I had a ticket that turned out not to be valid) while the man in a couple of seats down was only warned for the same thing.

So they can use discretion.

The difference was that the man was 6ft, drunk & aggressive

This ^^

OP wasn't "scamming it" without a ticket. She had clearly missed the previous train. I have witnessed inspectors turning a blind eye to a loud and aggressive twat. I think they will choose to back off from those types but will always sanction a meek type.

I thought that if you missed an advance purchased booked train because the connecting train was late (I assume you checked the timetable to think that you should have been able to connect not just assumed.) Then your ap ticket should still be valid. You maybe needed to speak to the ticket person on the first train or at the station however to get it validated.