AIBU to email Head about Class Ambassador decision?

[wingingit001]

Sorry for the long rant! My son attends a school that has in the last year introduced a Class Ambassador (CA) system whereby every half term one boy and one girl from each class is given a badge and called a CA. They must be a 'role model' in order to get it (well-behaved, smart, polite, try hard in class etc etc). They get to sit at the back of the class on a chair (rather than on the carpet) and take the register to the office, for example.

Now, here's the issue - the CA for the last half of term has been awarded to a boy who has already received it during this Academic Year.

As a parent I find this decision extremely exclusionary and unfair; I fear that it is being taken too seriously (especially given it is Year 1) and it could be seen as favouritism which I am sure is not the spirit in which the scheme was originally intended. Let’s assume that there are 30 children in the class and half are boys. With one being awarded it twice, that is TEN boys in one class of five and six year olds who are so poorly-behaved(?) that they are not worthy of the role. It’s one thing a child missing out because there are more children than chances, but to give it to the same child twice is a blatant declaration that the other boys are so far from being role models that they can’t possibly even be given a chance. TEN boys?! I find this really quite hard to believe. How poor must their conduct and behaviour have been all year that the Teacher has had to give it to the same boy twice??

As a comparison, Sports Day is now non-competitive so that the less physically-abled children are not excluded, yet a system has been introduced that is being poorly managed to the point that it has become discriminatory and knocking the self-esteem of children without exemplary behaviour and/or who may manage their emotions less well than others their age/have additional needs and therefore probably won’t ever be considered a role model.

The system as I understood it, should give a boy or girl six chances in an Academic Year to become CA. If that boy or girl is at the school from Year 1 to Year 6 (Reception don’t do it), that’s 36 chances to become a CA. I am already concerned for what the impact could be on a child if they have to sit in class and hear 36 TIMES that they haven’t been picked?

Please note that I did NOT expect my son to get it. Whilst his behaviour is not terrible (get told whenever I ask at Parent's Eve that he is well-behaved "on the whole") he has had a couple of incidents in the year where he has been silly (albeit only from what he has told me).

AIBU to think the system is unfair or should I just get over it? It could be that the NQT has just made a silly mistake but another parent has told me that it has happened in another class. I am not the only parent who is miffed about it.

I've asked my sister who is Head of Year 1 at another school and she said her parents would 'kick off' if the same happened at her school and 'rightly so'. I'd therefore be interested to hear from other Teachers/Heads.

Thanks in advance.

I actually think the complete opposite. In my DCs class they tried to even out things such as "star of the week" and would give it to DC for the most spurious of reasons. As long as there are a range of opportunities for DC to be awarded for different things (e.g. behaviour, trying hard, sports, handwriting etc.) so that all DC have the opportunity to get something then it's fine. My view at the time was that if X pupil got it every week (a boy in DS2's class that was always an impeccable role model and a lovely boy too) then maybe the rest would sit up and notice. I think the ambassador should go to the person who most deserves it even if that is the same person.

Someone commented on here earlier, and rightly so, that it was a good thing not to teach your child to be a sore loser. Perhaps that ethos also apply to the 48%!

Actually op, I agree with you.

The bright and well behaved ones get opportunities and the less able or less well behaved ones get opportunities often as motivational rewards. It's the middle ones who don't stand out, who are forgotten and overlooked - in all aspects of school.
I've seen this as a staff member and as a parent.

Mate.

It’s not important

Of course it's important, how can people brag about their amazing child being named "CA" on social media #blessed #proudmummy #geniuschild #soproud #humble if their little darling doesn't get chosen!

It's beyond unfair!

Urghhhh and people wonder why teachers are leaving the profession in droves! Seriously parents chill the fuck out! Complain if there's a legitimate issue like safeguarding etc but this is actually just a joke!

Currently thanking god for not being a classroom teacher anymore.
‘He’s well behaved-on the whole’ is a fabulous example of a teacher euphemism.
Seriously though who has time for this? Ridiculous.

YABU - these things tend not be awarded for real merit (ds's school had a system of star of the week which even the kids worked out the order) but if they are then that's ok -"knocking the self-esteem of those will less than exemplary behaviour" - ridiculous - it is encouraging them to have exemplary behaviour. They need to learn that good behaviour pays off - I tend to think that at this age effort should be rewarded so a child that improves a lot should get the award but they don't need protecting. They learn quickly about rewards that go to everyone and those that are rewards for something- DS gets really annoyed if someone gets an undeserved award.

Even if you think your concerns are valid why not just ask the teacher? she might have good reasons or just not have realised the same child got it

Year 1? As in primary 1? 5 year olds? Dude. No.

I really couldn't ever have given a shit about this sort of thing.

Certainly in primary school my kids didn't get these types of "accolades", although thankfully there wasn't too much of this stupidity.

Have a conversation with the teacher if you really must, but the fact that they are telling you that your child is "well behaved, on the whole" does suggest that there is room for improvement.

I'm a teacher and I find this worrying because children need to learn (and yes from a young age) that really good behaviour and trying really hard sees positive results. I work abroad now where this is very much the way of thinking, and it's not that the brightest kids are favoured but it will be the kids who make an effort or who really try hard and work towards getting what they want, who will be rewarded. The ones who don't really give a shit until it's time to get something good (when they suddenly really want it) won't be considered as they haven't earned it. In the UK I think this belief that literally everyone should be allowed to do everything even if they don't deserve it and haven't worked towards it sends an awful message to children. It might seem kind in the short term but it's not teaching them anything about life. I'm guessing this boy has consistently gold behaviour and consistently works hard and consistently tries. In my opinion if this is the case he deserves to be rewarded with more responsibility that he's earned. 🤷

There is a massive difference though, between

• rotating the award between say 10 of the 15 boys in the class because those 10 meet the criteria (though some better than others)

and

• giving the award twice within the first few rotations.

The latter really implies to the kids that none of the others are worthy. Now if this is really the case then it needs to be explained to the others how high the bar is to be chosen.

Is the CA role about rewarding 'the best child', or should it not also be about motivating the others too? If it has a motivation role then it needs to be spread more. If it is for 'the best' then crack on and give it to the same child each time, but don't be surprised when the others stop even trying to reach the bar.

The reason for the OP to write a mild email now is to point out how other children will feel if this keeps happening. We as adults can see how little this matters in the scheme of things, but it is a reward precisely because the school knows it does matter to the children.

‘He’s well behaved-on the whole’ is a fabulous example of a teacher euphemism.
Yep, thought the same - had I heard something like this, would have immediately made a mental note to interrogate DS about what he's up to.

The only thing you could complain as complaining seems to be your schtick about is the "one boy and one girl" thing. Also I think its weird that they get to sit on a chair not the floor as a mark of "status" It's all a bit odd.

Who get's picked and how? Mind your own OP

We shouldn't remove all competition we should just reward different strengths.
I agree but there has to be recognition of all different strengths and not just sporting ability, musical ability, academic ability and being loud enough in class to be noticed by the teacher and made prefect. Some kids (yes, I was one of them) aren't sporty or musical, are average academically, and don't get noticed so aren't rewarded in any way. How is that encouraging? (Answer - it's not)

DippyAvocado

I'm a teacher and actually I would bring it up - a quick word with the teacher rather than emailing the head though. It's probably an oversight but I would want to know as these sorts of things do matter to the pupils. If it was my class I would probably allow there to be two boy class ambassadors just for this half-term.

I'm a teacher as well and I agree.

What are you going to do if he doesn't get the part of Joseph in the nativity play at Christmas? email the Vatican....seriously get a grip .....