Do you judge single mums who claim benefits to be able to stay home with DC?

[username00000]

Specifically DC before school age.

The government doesn't do enough to get women with children back into the workplace. Scandinavian type goverment provided childcare with properly paid professionally trained childcare workers is what is needed. Not going to happen when the UK can't even get schools sorted.

It could happen though, if any government was ever minded to give childcare the funding it deserves.

Although I daresay the people who currently resent their tax being used to support parents who opt to stay at home when they have children would probably also complain about paying tax to subsidise child care so those parents can go back to work.

In general no, however I did know someone whose children were spaced with each one being born less than 6 months before the income support entitlement ended (different fathers without relationships and no 'accidents in between') - it seemed to be too much of a coincidence

I don’t know about tax credits - I’ve never heard of them!
I don’t actually know what we would be entitled to, and it seems impossible to work out, given that I need to know my husbands financial incomings/outgoings and I don’t know what they are. Or even where to start looking. I don’t think he knows how much he is paid.

No.

In your original post you are the one who said you had 15 hours a week when your child was in childcare, I am not making up anything. If you don't want to work, clearly you don't. Just don't come and pretend you have no choice.

Oh piss off. The poster you are replying to has said she is the full time carer of her child who has complex special needs. She is caring for him all hours except for those 15 hours a week when she gets a little break. And probably not much of one since it's probably time to do errands that it's tricky to do with a child with SN in tow. Do you work every single hour of the week with only 15 off? I doubt it. This government is one of the worst for cutting benefits and they've awarded DLA and carers allowance to this poster which should tell you it's needed. Maybe stop posting goady nonsense about a subject on which you clearly have no experience and learn a bit of empathy.

Why should other hard working tax payers pay for your life choices.

Because that's what they choose by working confused It's obvious join them on benefits if you don't want to pay, what a stupid comment.

and there you have it... One of them.

@myDHhasahobbyanditsnotcycling I refer you to @Bluestitch's response which is more eloquent than I could possibly manage atm. Your lack of ability to even want to empathise is shocking. You have offended and saddened me today more than you could possibly know.

Not at all.

Bluestitch
piss off yourself, how charming are you!

Working full time and taking care of my kids evenings and weekends? No, of course I haven't got 15 hours off! You are having a laugh! Unless you include the hours I am sleeping as my "me time"? hilarious.

TWO threads bashing young mothers today.

Nice.

thetonsillolith
It wasn't my intention to upset you, I won't bother with the other poster reply who seem to think that working mums are all on a jolly with unlimited budgets and access to spa breaks

thetonsillith I'm in similar circumstances to you. I have to home educate my child as he's not even getting the education to which he is legally entitled due to his needs not being met. Everything is a battle for the basic things that others take for granted, like a nursery or school place. Please ignore posters like that who haven't got a clue.

crazyasafox
you are the one who assume that "young mum" must mean "single mum on benefit"! That's a bit of a leap!

Maybe you would be kinder @myDHhasahobbyanditsnotcycling if you had to spend an entire day filling in a form in which you describe at length how disabled your child is and how it impacts upon your day to day life.

Some mums with disabled children work - good for them. Many simply would not be able to manage it.

No holiday clubs for SN kids. No after school clubs either. No specialist childminders or nannies.

You are angry at being judged @myDHhasahobbyanditsnotcycling but you are making judgemental comments yourself.'

Caring for her child is tonsils job myDhblahblah. She is paid (badly) to do it and is working and earning her money. You are telling her she should get another job too during the small bit of respite she gets. You are ignorant.

if someone can work but chooses not to I find it hard not to judge. Benefits aren't there to support a choice they are there to support those who don't have one imo.

thetonsillolith
I am not angry at all, I just think you are talking absolute nonsense and seem to have a very weird vision of the life of a working mum!

Not at all. And for those who say you shouldn't have children if you can't support them you are basically saying children are a luxury! Good luck finding people to pay tax and fund your pensions or wipe your bum when you are old and decrepit if we start limiting births based on financial stability.

I've said nothing about your life as a working mum @myDHhasahobbyanditsnotcycling

Even some of the harshest posters on these types of threads usually have the decency to say 'disability or SN aside'. Imagine also bashing the parents of severally disabled children and telling them not working is a lifestyle choice, and then having the audacity to get annoyed at being called out on it.

I don't really know how I've offended @myDHhasahobbyanditsnotcycling tbh. By not working? I didn't ask for a disabled child. I rolled the dice like every expectant mother does.

Nope - I think being a SAHM shouldn't be a privilege for the wealthy. I'm very happy to see benefits enable it, even though I'm a wealthier mum who couldn't have afforded it.

thetonsillolith

to be fair, circumstances vary.
No holiday clubs for SN kids. No after school clubs either. No specialist childminders or nannies.

I know of at least 2 specialist schools in my area who do offer holiday clubs and after school clubs (and breakfast clubs) for SN kids. I am not pretending these schools are everywhere, but around here there are options.

The fact that there is huge postcode lottery in this country, regarding education or health, could be a new thread in itself.

So I lost the lottery @myDHhasahobbyanditsnotcycling - so stop judging me