To go to church even if I am an athiest?

[Imicola]

So we moved a couple of years ago, spent lots of time looking for a house then renovating said house, and now have a baby. We don't have any real friends where we live as we didn't really have any time to get out and meet people before baby arrived. DH is keen for us to go to church as it is the only thing locally on a weekend where we can go with a baby and meet other local people. I don't believe in god and generally don't like religion of any type, but I am contemplating going to support DH in this. I'm not sure though if this is a terrible idea...i feel like I wouldn't enjoy the services, but perhaps it would be worth it to meet people. But is it rude of me to go when I don't believe?
Any thoughts? I feel conflicted!

Catholic here - My church would happily welcome you to attend services and the community events. Even better if you want to do some volunteering work No pressure at all to be baptised and confirmed. Definitely introduce yourself to the Priest or Clergy and they will be delighted to meet you and let you know how you can meet other parishioners. There won't be any judgement. Why would there?

Just a very quick guide to Catholic services

• It is frowned upon for adults to talk during Mass (children chattering/playing/crying is no problem!)
• There will be one (or most often two charity collections) so you might want to have some change but it is definitely not obligatory.

-It is Catholic belief that only Catholics who have no mortal sins since their last reconciliation and believe fully in transubstantiation can take part in Communion. Non-Catholics can go up for a blessing ( put your arm across you resting on your shoulder) or stay in the pews. The Body and Blood of Christ are taken very seriously!

• Don't go to a TLM by mistake! This is a Catholic mass conducted in Latin. It would be listed as TLM or Mass of Extraordinary Form on the Newsletter.

I would recommend taking a look at Bishop Barron's explanation of the Mass just so you can follow what's going on and why people are doing certain things!

Good Luck!!!

Why would there?

Um, isn't the entire Catholic church predicated on the Last Judgement?

Does your church run a playgroup? It might be a food place to start and scope it out in a way. They are often run by curates wife/ members of the church so will give you a bit of a flavour of the ethos of the church.

People don’t tend to quiz you about your beliefs at church, as they are sort of assumed. In my experience of CoE churches for parts of the service such as holy communion, Apostles Creed etc it is made clear that those who “aren’t there yet” with their belief aren’t expected to join in. At worst they will assume that your starting to attend to get your child into a local church school if oversubscribed.

Depending on the church and amount of young families in attendance it is a brilliant place to meet people but be warned you’ll also run into a lot of Nigels and Martins that will bore you with details of their Parish Church Council nomination etc etc...

I didn't know anyone in our local community when dc1 was born so I went to lots of baby groups, made friends and then we started doing things as families at weekends so that might be an option too.

I think this is a better plan ^ but there's nothing wrong with going to church if you don't believe, as long as your respectful. I just agree with people saying that your friendships might wilt if people think they're socialising with another religious couple and then find out that you're not. Some people won't mind, but others might think it's a bit odd.

I'm an atheist and got involved with my local church through the tots group. One regular church goer nearly fell off her chair one day when we were discussing religion and I told her I was atheist, especially as I'd been attending and helping out at functions for many years. After a minute or so, she said faith in life and good people is faith.

The vicar is one of my good friends now, she moved a couple of hundred miles away but we keep in touch. Go to the tots group anyway and you can go to church with your husband if you choose to do it.

Um. I didn't say that God doesn't rightly judge for particular and final judgement. We wouldn't judge the reasons for why someone would want to go to church and all are welcome.

All of which you can find in other groups with people who aren't hoping to convert you to their beliefs.

If we're being pedantic, lots of other groups hope to convert people to other beliefs including non-religious ones. Perhaps, you are simply stereotyping all religious people?

It’s an interesting question OP and I’m with Mitzi on this one. I’m a humanist and Im an admirer and have a great appreciation for the architecture, music, art, social and community aspects of church-going. Unlike Mitzi though, I actually have done bellringing (they practice in the evening)

When DD1 was little we went to a church playgroup and made friends through that and the socialising continued at weekends and holidays. There was never any pressure to ‘join’ the church and I’m still friends with many members now. I often sit in our village church and listen to the organist or the choir. Nobody I know through the church has ever questioned my faith.

Yeah, practices were Thursdays and I already have choir Tuesday and Wednesday - but they had an inconvenient habit of being booked for Saturday weddings as well as Sunday morning services and I hate joining something and then either letting them down or (more likely) going along and losing the entire day to it.

If churches didn't want non believers going, they wouldn't offer toddler groups, lunch clubs or 90% of the things they do.

Let's just say I find the beliefs of the Ramblers' Association less socially destructive than those of organised religion.

I actually didn’t think of the weddings and the services, which says it all really

OP I started a similar thread, it's here in case you are curious

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/philosophy_religion_spirituality/3583226-Church-for-non-believers

no one mentioned Unitarianism, that's interesting.

I figure at some point I might have to do this, because I do want to leave London, but not sure I'm ready for church just yet.

it is good to know that there are people there for community though.

I would argue that Anti-theist beliefs can be very damaging with their stereotyping and prejudice too.

RosaWaiting thanks! I was thinking perhaps it would be really odd to attend, but it seems it is not uncommon which is what my DH was trying to tell me!