Why would a woman put up with this?

[bebebutton]

A man who is capable of working but hasn't for 4 years meaning every penny spent is yours?

Lives in your house but due to a court order means that you have to leave it if his kids come over?

Has got off with women in front of you?

Sexts other women?

I am jsut so curious as to why a woman would bother with a man like this?

Is this some fictitious guy you have made up, OP, or is it a genuine situation?

The second part of it would suggest to me that there is a lot more to it than the side of things you have heard

Each one of those on its own would end it for me. I try to understand women who put up with this (and far less) but I really struggle. I do empathise with low self esteem and such issues but I honestly can't get my head around anyone allowing themselves to be treated so badly. Nothing, even the loss of your home is worth this.

Some women prefer to be miserable than single.

No self worth. Also a pattern of being with emotionally abusive partners is often set & rooted in an abusive (emotionally or physically) childhood. Those relationships set the template you follow for future ones. It's called Stockholm Syndrome when you stay with abusive partners. You're so mentally ground down you believe you're abuser cares for you & you'd never survive on your own. The abuser ruthlessly exploits that belief system.

The court order might have something to do with it.

He is not a fictitious guy - he is a real person.

The court order says the children can go to his home (which she paid in cash for he did not contribute towards it) and that when they do she cannot be there.

Why would she have to leave when the children come over unless she’s the one who has done dodgy things before?

Id presume shes some sort of sexual abuser if shes not allowed near kids

No idea, I certainly wouldn’t.

What a fucking doormat.

"The court order says the children can go to his home (which she paid in cash for he did not contribute towards it) and that when they do she cannot be there."

Agree with Sirzy - there's clearly an awful lot going on that you're not privy too.

On the surface if it and down to what you’ve said, my opinion is that no woman should ever put up with this.

However life sometimes isn’t so simple and I’m sure there is way more to it than just what’s been posted

I don't understand why she has to leave her own home when the step kids visit? What is the reasoning for this given by the courts?

Lives in your house but due to a court order means that you have to leave it if his kids come over?

But why?

A court order wouldnt say she cant be around the kids without very good reasons. Relating to her.

I am just really curious as to why she would agree - I would say no you take the kids somewhere else this is my house.

He contributes nothing I presume and I know she gave him a credit card to use.

I just couldn't fancy or respect a man like that.

This is you...
My ExH hasn't worked for 4 years because his partner is a millionaire. I think therefore the liability falls to her like it does for all his other bills.

That’s a bit of a drip feed.

Cross posted with you.

You haven’t addressed why she isn’t allowed to be there when the children visit.

Presumably you fancied and respected him at some point?

Why is she not allowed there when the kids are there?

It is and I am really curious as to why she puts up with him?

What do you think?

I think it’s nothing to do with you!

It's not really any of your business is it? Stop obsessing and move on with your life.

It's not setting a great example of a relationship to your children. Odd set up. If she's a millionaire what on earth does she see in him? Is he stunningly good looking?