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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To actually consider I could be pregnant 8 weeks after having baby?

574 replies

b0bb1n · 30/05/2019 08:03

Baby born April 2nd. 22nd May got what seemed to be first period, but it didn't last as long as normal (I read it's normal for them to change pp though).

About a week (give or take) beforehand, dtd twice and he pulled out, and once dtd no pulling out. The day after the suspected period had finished (26th May) also dtd no pulling out (sorry for details).

Tuesday night I felt sick when I woke up, like I was going to be sick (I sleep evenings so night is my morning). This morning (now) I feel nausea again.

I am probably just overly paranoid because with my first pregnancy nausea was the first symptom and it started pretty much immediately after conception. Also I noticed a 'difference' in the smell of dh's tobacco (which was just increased sense of smell) and lately I can smell his tobacco when it's in the pouch a couple of feet away.

If it wasn't for the suspected period I would feel a lot more sure I was pregnant. I feel too sick to proof read this I hope it makes sense!

OP posts:
Napssavelives · 01/06/2019 08:42

They are my boundaries and that’s ok, just like it’s ok for you to want to have sex. Not really sure why you are getting so uptight about it.

BasilBooBoo · 01/06/2019 08:43

Congratulations Op, sounds like you have a happy accident on your hands. Hope you enjoy your family. 👶👶

FWIW - I had sex 2 weeks after my elective section. Had bleeding for about 5 days post birth and felt well healed by 2 weeks.

I think my hormones made me feel like I wanted another baby straight away after birth but I could still remember the full pregnancy of hyperemesis so we didn't do that.

Everyone has a different experience of pregnancy, birth and the newborn phase.

Myfoolishboatisleaning · 01/06/2019 08:46

Why not start your own thread Naps discussing how disgusting you find postpartum sex, because that is not what the OP asked. So it sounds very judgemental and pretty crappy.

Napssavelives · 01/06/2019 08:50

Pretty sure you were the one that started getting confrontational about it.

Myfoolishboatisleaning · 01/06/2019 08:52

Nope. You stated postpartum sex was gross. I pulled you up on the use of that unnecessary language. It is not gross.

boobirdblue · 01/06/2019 08:52

@Napssavelives you said it's gross, not you thought it was gross because of your boundaries.

Napssavelives · 01/06/2019 08:53

For me having sex whilst still bleeding postpartum would make me feel gross- my opinion is allowed as much as yours is. Chill out!

Myfoolishboatisleaning · 01/06/2019 08:55

Yes, on your own thread. Your opinion is not related to anything the OP asked, so why state your irrelevant opinion in such a derogatory and negative way?

Napssavelives · 01/06/2019 08:56

Yawn
I have better things to do that get in an argument with you about this. I’m allowed an opinion as you are. Chill out.

OP- didn’t meant to derail your thread. Wishing you the result you want.

boobirdblue · 01/06/2019 08:59

@Napssavelives your view on the OPs sexual preferences was not requested! Not sure why you ever needed to comment on it?

SisterMaryLoquacious · 01/06/2019 09:00

The OP clearly stated in her first post that she had what she thought was a period after about 7 weeks and therefore must have been well past the lochia stage (otherwise she wouldn’t have noticed), so I’m not sure why people are bringing bleeding into it at all. It’s like saying “well I’m a lesbian who had a baby with donor sperm so I can’t imagine why you’d be having sex with a man after giving birth”.

Or indeed why so many people are acting as if having sex 6 and 7 weeks pp is freakish or medically risky.

Good wishes OP. Two babies so close together wouldn’t be my choice but it’s clearly fine with you.

BenWillbondsPants · 01/06/2019 09:05

Well, this escalated.

Talk about some folks making a thread all about them ...

Putyourdamnshoeson · 01/06/2019 09:14

naps YOU didn't derail.
Point is, you expressed surprise that no one had mentioned the bleeding thing. I agreed. We were called uptight, you had your choice of sexual partner questioned, etc.
I understand that some women feel horny on their period or post natal and that they have sex then. It surprises me. I know at least two women who were pressured into having sex whilst expelling lochia.
I don't think that wanting to have sex during either of these times is disgusting, but it is gross to me and a good many others. This does not make us uptight or sex haters or whatever else we've been accused of.
My sex ready comment came not from any weird notion that women dislike sex, but that women who find period/lochia sex gross are uptight. It's not uptight to have a preference.
But then, I still think that's obvious.

fecketyfeck21 · 01/06/2019 09:28

just take a test, it's hardly a big deal peeps, or though tough on the body if op is expecting.

Original poster
b0bb1n · 01/06/2019 09:34

So I took another test last night, only about 12hrs after the first one.

I couldn't see a line, but then the first test I took I could only see the very faint line in natural daylight at the window.

It feel like I'm in limbo. I've had so many 'symptoms' and I just 'feel' pg if that makes sense. I know it's far too early for a dark pink line but until / unless I have one I don't want to get my hopes up.

Thanks so much to everyone who has written nice and lovely and helpful comments xx

OP posts:
boobirdblue · 01/06/2019 09:44

@b0bb1n oh no, it may be your hormones are playing tricks on you?

TreeSunset · 01/06/2019 09:44

I’d take another this morning OP with first morning urine where the hormones are strongest. Or take another one tomorrow morning.

Sorry about the detailing. Wanting to have sex with your partner is normal and lots of us are in loving relationships where we have never felt pressurised for sex, but understand it does happen. If I want to have sex a week after my baby I bloody well will. My friend had sex every day from day 3 post EMCS, as her baby was in NICU and she wanted to feel close to her husband. She wasn’t abused, it was what she wanted.

WeBuiltCisCityOnSexistRoles · 01/06/2019 09:45

Oh bobbin i really hope you are happy with whatever result you get Smile

This thread has been interesting to note all the totally fuckwitted rude posters, hope they haven't ruined it for you. I believe if adults do anything sexually which they both consent to, and it's legal, why the fuck do other people think they have a right to judge them by? Hmm Nothing wrong with setting your own bar wherever you want, don't try and set everyone else's' bar for them though! Or be rude about other peoples' choices. It's rude, and it's arrogant too.

I had mine all close together, deliberately. It was great when they were little as whilst (for eg) there were all in nappies at the same time, the "nappy years" were done and dusted in a fairly short space of time. They also amused each other playing together. The teenage years cost a bloody bomb though - all those shoes etc! They are still close, in fact they all went out to the cinema and a meal together this week Smile

Just be prepared for every second person asking you if your television is broken Grin

boobirdblue · 01/06/2019 09:45

@b0bb1n and maybe do a morning test?

SoupDragon · 01/06/2019 09:54

you expressed surprise that no one had mentioned the bleeding thing

The OP did in her very first paragraph.

roundligament · 01/06/2019 10:05

@Napssavelives
I was hardly bleeding actually I had a c section
And I wanted to have sex.. not sure what's gross about sex / blood.

Anyway it's not really the point my point was different people and different couples have sex at different points after the birth of a child and they are all ok. So to some people who were wondering how she had sex soon after a baby that was my point anyway

Devilinatwinset · 01/06/2019 10:06

Get some of the early pregnancy tests from eBay. You can get about 5 strips for a quid or so. Very sensitive tests & v.reliable. You can test every couple of days until you get a definite +ve/-ve. If you order today they'll be with you tomorrow (or maybe not on a Sunday) or Monday

mindutopia · 01/06/2019 10:52

I would test again with a first response either this morning or tomorrow morning. With my 2nd baby, I felt very ill from 5 dpo. I took a test at 10 dpo because I was certain I was pregnant. It was completely negative, not even the faintest line. I continued to feel ill and took another 6 days later and it was a very strong positive.

Densol999 · 01/06/2019 11:21

I read many psycho mums net replies out to my husband to be ! We LOL and he is so glad to have such a normal partner Grin

OP - hope its the result you want .... if not there is always next month ! Flowers xx

Lizzie48 · 01/06/2019 11:28

A lot of people clearly are squeamish at the idea of having sex when on their period, or with any form of bleeding underneath. I always have been. But I can admit that it’s my issue, because of childhood SA; I would hardly judge anyone else for not having a problem with it. (I actually envy you if anything.)

Anyway, I hope you get an answer soon either way, OP. And if you’re not pregnant yet, I hope you soon are if that’s what you want (which it appears to be.