Aibu to send my son from year 4 to private school?

[Abbazed]

Ie reception to yr 3 then year 4 private school? Is to prep for 11 plus?

Depends if he wants to?
If you are expecting him to leave his friends, go to private school and make new ones and then return to state school and try to fit in with yet another group of friends then yes. Yabu.
If you plan to send him to private from y4 into high school yanbu.

From year 3 many decent private schools do an entrance test to decide on whether they offer a space. Privat schools also tend to do a lot more than is on the curriculum. Joining in year 4 could be hard, harder than for secondary when everybody is new

My son started at an indie in year 3 and kids join all the time and soon settle in. You need to do what is best for him and you.

In fact many join in yr 5 or 6 to get in before the bigger intakes in yr 7/9 if it is a school that goes from age 3-18.

Too many variables really.

Is he happy where he is? What would moving achieve?

What are your plans post 11?

If there’s an entrance test is his likely to pass? How would he feel about sitting?

Have you visited the school in question?

Y4 isn’t a standard intake year, you’d be relying on a child at your chosen private school leaving, and you being first on the waiting list. If you want to move him, better to go in Y3.

We live rurally and the schools not much cop. He currently is in Nursery. I do a lot extra with him. Post 11 the Grammar school.

He's bright. He'll pass.

He's bright. He'll pass

Please, please don’t tell him that!

He currently is in Nursery

Move him now. Far less disruptive IMO. If he’s only in nursery, there’s chance for the school to improve of course.

Whyever not? Why would I lie? Doubtful. He'd be better at home.

Why not go in at year 3? There is a major intake at that year in many private schools. Best to go in as part of new batch than to be the new kid on the block trying to break into established friendships.

Is there any particular reason why you chose year 4, instead of 3?

Whyever not? Why would I lie?

Because you’re setting him up for a fall. One of DD’s friends was told repeatedly “you’re so bright, you’ll pass the 11+”.

She didn’t and it’s devastated her.

He's bright. He'll pass

At least 50% of the parents in our area who say that are proved wrong. It's a huge shock to the ones who have put all their eggs in the grammar school basket.

I had a parent say it to me the other day. I just nodded, smiled and hoped for her DD's sake that she's right.

Bright at nursery doesn't guarantee they will pass a test in 6 years. Bizarre.

Bright kids don’t always pass the 11plus. All it takes is a slip, a bad day, nerves, illness.

I know of a kid where the test format involved filling in multi choice answers on a large sheet like a lottery ticket. Put 2 in first line accidentally. Realised at end of the section, but no time to go back and correct. Not allowed rulers or any other line “guide.” Very fast paced test.

Actually, I know of 2 this happened to. Different years. The first child on course for 8s and 9s in GCSE and got sixes in the (old style SATS). Missed grammar cut off by 1 point. Was devastated.

He’s at nursery and yet you think you can tell he is bright and will pass an entrance exam

You have no idea. And I say that kindly. It’s far too young to tell.

Start him at the usual intake at 7 but have a plan in case he doesn’t get through 11+ (which it sounds like is your plan). Why would you delay until year 4?

To tell him it’s not prepping him for 11+ and there is no good option if he doesn’t get it is horrendous pressure on a child and even if academically able he may not be suited to grammer as it’s quite a pressure pot.

Why not just get him a tutor. If he's bright enough that's all he'll need even if the school isn't great.

Private school do a lot more than content though. A lot is public speaking, confidence building, teamwork, Forrest school, music, sport, ...
Don’t do a lot of work extra with him i nursery. Let him have fun, explore, develop. Your chances for the 11 plus will improve dramatically

My DC is best friends with a child who will be going to private school after year 3. They've done it with their older kids too.

I am upset that my DC is going to lose a good friend soon (we've been preparing DC) but I do find it a bit weird from the parents perspective?

If you want to privately educate then do from the get go? Don't take someone else's place hugely oversubscribed school if you intend to piss off half way through the childs education?

Or

If state school is good enough for the first few years then let the child stay in state school?

• I appreciate that I don't understand private school and the significance of year 3/4???

The mother of my DC friend is forever telling me how unsettling / hard it was for her older kids who got hoiked out mid way through primary yet she is doing it again???

It pisses me off that money allows people the make choices that affect people who don't have money (see my point about oversubscription!)

@Yura I get Montessori however we live in literal testing times. @Littlefield the reverse is also true...only time will tell. @shuffleboard I'm happy to install his confidence. I will get him through the 11 plus come hell or high water! @crunchymum we live in the rural North. It's very expensive to live and work here. Schools aren't oversubscribed. You can pick any you like. Sadly, smaller schools are losing pupils and facing closure. No need to swear. You can make your point without it.

we live in the rural North

Is the grammar in question an all boys?

@Crunchy

Agree with you 100%!

And OP, let your kid be a kid! Very strange and unfair to be projecting your expectations on a toddler

Is there anything else you want for your child’s childhood or is it all just pushing for grammar school