Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think you don't let your kid shoot people in the supermarket?

388 replies

DonkeyHohtay · 25/05/2019 11:28

Busy Saturday morning in the supermarket. Boy of about 8 with his Dad. Dad busy filling his basket and behaving perfectly normally.

Boy has a large, black plastic gun. Rifle type rather than a pistol (I'm not a gun expert). Boy is holding gun up to his shoulder, looking down the length of it, pointing it at people and saying "bang bang you're dead". Confused When boy pointed it at me I said - perfectly politely - "Please don't point that at me, I don't like guns".

Father looked at me as if I had grown two heads.

AIBU to think that the supermarket on a busy morning isn't the place for toy guns??

Full disclosure - I'm not a gun fan. Although who is. My kids have in the past had those large "Nerf" type guns which are bright orange and could never be mistaken for a real one. The rules were always that shooting the little foam things at people was not allowed. The had hours of fun in the garden trying to hit a tree or something. This wasn't a gun like that. It was a toy gun, but a black one made to look like the real thing.

AIBU to be a wee bit shocked and think this was completely inappropriate?

OP posts:
PolinaPansy · 27/05/2019 11:51

Of course it is, just not in a supermarket.

My reply was about all those saying making games out of killing is crass, not necessarily about the supermarket. I've already said I would have taken the shot from the kid, it wouldn't have upset me being pretend shot at.

LolaSmiles · 27/05/2019 11:52

PolinaPansy
Oh right. Sorry, my mistake.

LiquidSwords · 27/05/2019 12:36

I don't see anything wrong with playing in a supermarket if it has zero effect on other people. Young kids will use their imagination to play pretty much anywhere you go, so if you want to stop that, you get into "kids shouldn't go to the supermarket" territory, which doesn't even warrant a discussion tbh.

LolaSmiles · 27/05/2019 13:01

Young kids will use their imagination to play pretty much anywhere you go, so if you want to stop that, you get into "kids shouldn't go to the supermarket" territory, which doesn't even warrant a discussion tbh.
Because the only options are:

  1. Allow children to use every public place as a play area
Or
  1. Children shouldnt go out in public.

If only there was a way for children to be in public and appropriately behaved for thr situation.

aliasname · 27/05/2019 13:15

Okay I’ve never told anyone this but it happened to me many years ago. DS was in a pushchair in the supermarket.

A 5 year old boy was playing with a toy gun, I could hear it making that clicking sound as he fired it. As my DS was younger, I didn’t know much about toy guns but assumed it was firing plastic pellets.

Then the boy ran up to us (the mother was in a different aisle) and pointed it at DS.

Okay I’m not proud of this but I reached out and slapped the kid. It was pure instinct - I thought he was going to shoot DS in the face, even a plastic pellet could damage his eye. I went into full tiger mother mode.

Anyway, the mum kicked off, as soon as I’d done it my adrenaline dropped and I burst into tears apologising, she called the police and I ended up being given a caution. (Turned out the gun wasn’t loaded, but it still made the noise)

Not sure what my point is, other than I really fucking hate those things. I don’t blame the mum for being angry, although calling the police was OTT... he pointed it at my baby’s FACE.

LiquidSwords · 27/05/2019 13:19

Because the only options are:
1. Allow children to use every public place as a play area
Or
2. Children shouldnt go out in public

That's what I'm saying though. You can't (shouldn't?) stop a child using their imagination. If it's not affecting anyone, it's not inappropriate. Well, at least the majority of people don't think so, thankfully.

stayathomer · 27/05/2019 13:31

There's times kids aim a gun at you and actually it's a real bratty gesture and there's times it's just a game. I hate guns more because they generally involve pellets and some one getting hurt. I've never bought a gun but people for some reason seem yo think it's okay to give them for presents and then tell me they wouldn't have them in their house ( in two cases the kids were told not to play with them until their children had left!!) Hmmm, now I back to thinking about getting rid of them again...

stayathomer · 27/05/2019 13:32

Sorry got side tracked there. The dad was by for not being embarrassed that his kid was bothering you!!!

NottonightJosepheen · 27/05/2019 15:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WhiteDust · 27/05/2019 15:37

Alias I understand too. Thanks

CrazyCatNerd · 27/05/2019 15:49

@LolaSmiles If you bothered to RTFT, you'd see that I'd already said that Wink

LolaSmiles · 27/05/2019 15:52

CrazyCatNerd
I know. I'm with you.
The reply was more for those who seem to think that it's essential for little dears to have free flowing imaginative play in the middle of the baked bean aisle. Grin

LiquidSwords · 27/05/2019 16:06

The reply was more for those who seem to think that it's essential for little dears to have free flowing imaginative play in the middle of the baked bean aisle

As opposed to people who think children should not be allowed to use their imagination in public even if it affects you in no way whatsoever. You sound like a Roald Dahl villain.

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 27/05/2019 16:12

Alias, you assaulted a child.im surprised at the platitudes the poor you and understanding
I understand you fiercely felt defensive of your own child but you had no filter and you wildly over reacted. Inexcusable
You now have a caution that’ll show on any enhanced DBS check

BasilTheGreat · 27/05/2019 16:14

Just return fire! Grin

stayathomer · 27/05/2019 16:21

LipstickHandbagCoffee
Assault? The child aimed a possible pellet gun at her child's face.

magicBrenda · 27/05/2019 16:22

aliasname Jesus that was extreme your lucky you walked away with a caution. Regardless of instinct you assaulted a five year old child yet still seem quite unrepentant.

You could have dealt with that many other ways. I hope you have your violent urges in check as that could see you behind bars one day.

LiquidSwords · 27/05/2019 16:23

Slapping the child for that is a severe overreaction though. If it was me my instinct would be to smack the gun away, not slap the kid!

magicBrenda · 27/05/2019 16:24

Assault yes which the police thought so too that’s why she was cautioned.

magicBrenda · 27/05/2019 16:25

LiquidSwords quite. This site astounds me daily ..

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 27/05/2019 16:31

Stayathome knock yourself out trying to spin why it’s ok to assault a child
Go on

stayathomer · 27/05/2019 16:35

Yes, sorry I do know it's assault, I typed without thinking, it's just a tough one, she was afraid for her child, reacted ( wrongly but I'm sure her hand just went out), then the child's mother decided the only way to deal with it was with the police. I'm not totally sure if I had a woman crying and saying she thought her child was in danger I'd have done the same but I do get it as s assault and I feel bad for all involved ( including aliasname)

LiquidSwords · 27/05/2019 16:37

If a woman slapped my five-year-old in the face instead of batting his toy gun away, I would definitely call the police.

magicBrenda · 27/05/2019 16:38

I'm not totally sure if I had a woman crying and saying she thought her child was in danger I'd have done the same but I do get it as s assault and I feel bad for all involved ( including aliasname)

Oh I’d have called the police. You cant go around assaulting children because you think they may have a loaded toy- regardless if the mother puts the tears on.

Quite ironic really..

Sux2buthen · 27/05/2019 16:39

@MrsBadcrumble123 we all go because....we want to. We like it. It's not an adult zone so sorry you don't understand that but the way you think isn't the only way.
Hth