To think that if you private rent your life should not be dictated to by the landlord whose mortgage you are paying

[Nursejackie1]

So many of us are stuck in private renting with no choice paying over the odds, while landlords are making a mint. Most landlords have all these rules that you can’t decorate without permission, can’t even put a wall hanging up without asking. Often can’t or need permission to have pets, have regular inspections. I pay loads for my home and due to that cannot save a deposit. My kids have never had their bedrooms decorated in the way I would like.. having to stick with plain magnolia. Why should somebody else decide whether my kids get to grow up with a family pet or not? AIBU to think that if you are paying somebodies mortgage for them then while you are in that house you should be able to treat it as your own within reason and not have your life dictated to and controlled by them?

I’m in a very fortunate position to be a homeowner and I am grateful for this but I do notice a tendency for some MNers to be snobbish about renters, as if they are better than them. Some people here seem to believe they worked so hard, much harder than everyone else and therefore, they ”deserve” to own a property. These people all imagine the “renters” having 2 flash cars, 3 foreign holidays per year, daily Starbucks coffees, meals out once a week and shopping at Waitrose etc. The reality is that very few average people afford these luxuries, even homeowners. People who rent can slowly save money but judgemental pillocks rarely change their ways.

As for the ridiculous suggestion about working harder and choosing different careers; if everyone was a doctor, who’d actually nurse the patients? Society needs everyone and the lower earners are not lower people.

Just finishing by, again, saying I am lucky enough to own a home but I had to challenge some of the ridiculous comments.

@53rdWay the issues for good landlords aren't really about tenants trashing properties, because insurance is available for this, or about tax changes, it is about enforcement. The laws exist to protect tenants but there is no one statutory body responsible, most falls to councils who due to austerity, have not been able to prioritise enforcement, or have chosen to spend council tax and government revenue in other ways. Once there is proper enforcement of the law, quite a lot of the issues suffered by tenants will go away. I'm not averse to having a registration scheme for landlords, including checks to ensure they are fit and proper persons to rent out properties, and to ensure they are aware of their statutory duties, providing it doesn't turn into a revenue raising exercise. The issue isn't most of the landlords posting on here, it's the ones renting out dangerous and substandard properties, deliberately flouting environmental health requirements and fitness for habitation requirements, who are getting away with it for years. The second worst property i ever saw was owned by a local councillor who let out student properties. It was dangerous, and that wasn't due to anything the students had done. The worst property was actually a well known social housing provider where the dog faeces all over the floor and furniture eventually led to the secure tenant being evicted. Both of these situations were due to poor landlord practices and lack of enforcement. Despite my flippant comments I am better versed than most in landlord and tenant law and practice, and it is successive governments failure to have a cohesive and robust housing policy that has led us to the crisis. The real issue is not and has not been addressed. But the sense of entitlement on here is pretty awful.

Life choices that led you to this point -

My job was off shored to a non European country, which pays cheaper wages. Made redundant
My partner's job was relocated 100s of miles away
We had to move quickly for job relocation, I got job in new town too

I can afford to let my property stay empty & pay the council tax & bills
However, I thought I'd help a family, by renting it out at below market rate

You know nothing about other peoples lives !

It must be flecking frustrating being unable to save for a deposit due to paying high rent costs as the housing system is totally fucked up.... And then reading on mn that actually, it's your own fault..... Especially when the poster saying this bought their first property with either a 100% mortgage or a deposit given from mummy.

Some of the attitudes/opinions on here....
Not being able to own is due to ‘lifestyle choice’.
I do wonder, how many of those with this opinion were helped by their parents with either deposits, or help with a good start in life and through university to enable them to get these jobs to afford deposits and a mortgage.
You play the hand you are dealt, and for many home ownership isn’t possible, through no fault or bad decision making of their own.
And yes I agree entirely with the op, in circumstances where tenants have paid a ‘bond’ and are up to date with rent payments/generally good tenants, they should be allowed to make minor alterations to decoration etc to make the place their home.

I pay my mortgage, or l get repossessed, my building society don't think l am 'entitled' to secure housing.....only as long as l pay my bills and abide by their rules...why should tenants be any different?

Considering this was posted in relation to the claim that secure housing should be a human right, it seems a valid point ...

I bought my first flat in the early 90s with a 100% mortgage. The fees etc were lumped into the mortgage. My boss at the time lied about what I earned so I could buy it.
I was 23. Now that flat is 4 times what I paid. A 23 Yr old today would need to be very well paid or have rich parents who helped out.
Blaming other, younger people for not being able to buy a place now, like we did back then, is downright fucking sick.

Times have changed people, get your heads out your arse and see the housing market for what it is.

Buying a house isn’t something easily done by many people. It’s not even possible for some.

You have to make the best of what life deals you. Luck has a huge huge part in home ownership. The right education, the right job, someone leaving to create a job opening that you get - it’s all chance, luck and hard work combined.

The property I rent out isn’t one I bought I inherited it from my grandparents - lucky.
I inherited it because when my grandad died i was 13 and my Nana and my siblings were worried she’d die while I was still at school because they cared for me after removal from our abusive and neglectful parents (siblings were given a cash equivalent from my grandads life insurance) - not so lucky really.

Dh and I live in a mortgage free house - lucky.
His first wife’s insurance paid it off when she died in her early 20s leaving DS1 without a mother as a toddler - not so lucky

No one gets anywhere in life on hard work alone. It’s a combination of hard work and pure luck.

Not just hard work or luck.
The times we live in contribute so much, life in the 80s and 90s was so different to what it us now.

I'm new here (browsed for years). I rent, I'm 40 years old, divorced, two teenage sons, ok relationship with their dad. Totally screwed over on divorce, finances. I can't afford to save to buy (although I used to be a homeowner).

I work full time, rent is £1400 per month, £200 council tax, plus all usual bills, food, car etc. I struggle a lot.

So to everyone that says you should save, make different life choices etc etc - with outgoings of well over £2k a month (no benefits apart from child benefit half of which soon to be lost as eldest taking an apprenticeship) and I work my arse off, could you afford to actually rent? If anyone was to look down on me for renting (not that my circle of family or friends do), my answer would be, fab, you own your own place but should it all go tits up could you actually afford to rent as that is my reality right now and you know what, it's a struggle but I'm doing it ok!

Parents giving a deposit was unheard of in my peer group.

A couple did go to university but most didn’t.

Life style choices we all made was not having children before buying.

Having a ft job and 1 or 2 or even 3 other jobs.

Renting the tiniest flat in an unpopular location or sharing a 2 bed place between 5 people.
2 people per bedroom and 1 in the living room.

When we finally bought it was always the cheapest place that could be afforded and renting out the main bedroom to help pay the mortgage.

Oh gosh, there really are such arseholes on this forum.
I'm a homeowner, I've also been a landlady in my late twenties. I only acheived this through inheritance and fortunate circumstance. I am a lowly according to MN non medical HCP, so not a vastly high earner either.

I would take absolutely no notice of those who are sniffy towards renters. Its vanishingly rare that anybody becomes a homeowner before the age of thirty five or so unless they are reliant on parental help or their partner's income.
Neither of which are a petsonal accomplishment or a reason to look down upon others.

However, some people are arseholes and need to bolster their egos by picking on renters on internet forums sad twats. Let them get on with it, OP YANBU

Oh and I look after my rented place like it's my own, why wouldn't I? It's my home. Regardless of whether a landlord is good or not, it's still my home, my sanctuary, why would I not respect it and treat it well? Some tenants really give some a bad name, it's a shame.

olivers that’s a very short sighted solution though because as many have said, a combination of the cost of their rent, their wage and their location means that if they didn’t have kids before buying, they wouldn’t have them at all because they’re in their 40s and 50s before they can buy. I’m in London, and most of my friends are in shared accommodation, renting a room in a house with several others. Some are in their mid 30s and can’t afford anything else. It’s all very well saying they should move somewhere cheaper but what about people who were born in London? What about the shop workers/waiting staff/cleaners/nurses/care workers etc of London? They literally enable the world to keep turning. If everyone on a min wage job made a “choice” to get something better paid and vacated all the expensive cities, the service industry would literally grind to a halt in those places. For some people, no amount of choices will enable them to buy a house. And that’s wrong, it’s a policy and government problem and needs reform

I'm afraid that the freedoms which you desire are beyond your economic reach.

Yanbu op, we have moved 5 times in 7 years private renting, it's so unstable and we've just had very bad luck. I feel incredible guilt my children don't have a permanent home, I wish I could afford a deposit to buy my own house, but saving wasn't an option whilst private renting, could have bought my own by now with all the rent I've paid and agency fees ect. Just had to move back in with my parents who live above a pub and 2 dcs to try and save for my own house now, may be here till I'm 80 tbh lol

100% agree snowflake

YANBU OP

I've skimmed through the first couple of pages of replies and some of it made me

It's like people who rent are some sort of sub-species. Not nice

I would ask the landlord about allowing you to redecorate, however, if you are saving up for a deposit it may not be worth the cost, put it towards your savings.

Although I can appreciate wanting to decorate it the way you/your children want

We rent and we treat the house like our home- because it is our home

Rented, worked more than one job to save up for deposit
There are places in UK where house prices are still reasonable

Owner occupation in the under 40s has fallen quite radically (sorry not sure how old op is) so op is not unusual to be in this position

Yep So good luck using peoples homes to prop up social care in the next twenty years.

Renting the tiniest flat in an unpopular location or sharing a 2 bed place between 5 people. 2 people per bedroom and 1 in the living room.

This is also the reality for many young people today and they still can't save for a deposit.

www.theguardian.com/society/2017/sep/20/millennials-spend-three-times-more-of-income-on-housing-than-grandparents

never in the history of Mumsnet has a tenant offered to do their own repairs (I’m not saying they should either

Tenancy agreements PROHIBIT tenants from touching the boiler.

If they did as you suggest and something went wrong and you were the house next door.....................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yep, bought a flat, shared with friends, slept in the living room for 3 years never ate out or had takeaways.... And it was only possible due to a 100% mortgage back in the day.

Ultimately the shitty state of housing in this country is because people voted for it. I truly believe that the British people want this. It is the British way to want to feel superior by being mortgaged to the hilt and having window treatments

Absolutely 1000% agree. You see the superiority played out on these boards time and time again.

And as for the jealousy argument. oh pleassse You see that when a right winger comes on a SH tenants thread to say its "free" housing.