To be worried about leaving a poo in a bin?

[SpectacularlyEmbarrassed]

NC for this one, for reasons that will become clear.

I stayed with DP last night (we don't live together, as we both have DC and also like to retreat to our own space). He has a small house and just one loo (as do I, FWIW, which is not much - just for context).

During the night he came down with food poisoning (? Assume so). He was up all night with D&V.

I thought I had escaped, but early morning was gripped by a sudden and violent need to poo. Then and there. However, DP was locked in the bathroom, throwing up.

I had a few minutes to ponder this one, but the short version is that I went downstairs, did the poo in an old towel and wrapped it in several Sainsbury's bags. I then crept out and stuck the well-wrapped poo in a council litter bin at the side of the house.

I can just about live with this. But I'm now in a state of horrendous anxiety in case I was caught on the council's CCTV leaving a bagged-up poo in one of their bins. I have visions of being arrested. I did wrap it up very well so no poor bin person would have been confronted with the evidence, but the bins have notices on them about not depositing household waste. AIBU to worry about being arrested for poo-depositing?

I didn't confess to DP, as he would have been so very shocked. I'm shocked myself, but I don't see that I had any alternative.

I'd like to thank this thread for my new username.

I'm not sure it's real though, as why wasnt OP puking aswell? They are fit enough to go toddling off to council bins during food poisoning? This is not my experience of food poisoning.

freshstartnewme I wondered why he had car litter, then I read the post again :)

Thank you all, not least for making me laugh so much after my very worrying day.

Puzzled, I love the brick story. 😂

And thank you, Justasking111 My poonami was a one-off. I spoke to DP 10 mins ago, and he didn't say a word about last night, but sounded quite well. When I asked him how he was feeling this morning, he said "fine, thanks". That was minutes before he threw up again (and I did my dreaded poo). That's him in a nutshell.

Cat litter even

@fresh start, why are you asking why he had cat litter?

@NatureWillDeleteTheEvidence Very good username. 😂 I dunno why he had it worse than I did. Perhaps he ate more of the offending item? Or was more susceptible? I do have a pretty iron constitution. He also eats more than I do. The bin is just outside his house, and I felt a bit ropey all night but not spectacularly so. Not sorry, though, as I have a terrible fear of being sick. So I suppose I got off lightly.

Oh FGS

Yep. We tried to contest. He paid a £100 fine.

You understand, this was a plastic bag with car and lunch detritus, not a mattress and tumble drier he was fly tipping.

Dog poo is worse and people leave that in council bins all the time. A bit of human poo should be fine.

A couple of months ago I was on my way to a meeting merrily walking through the high street. I suddenly started having stomach cramps but thought I’d be fine until I got to the building.

It was NOT fine and I ended up in Costa coffee, wrapping my underwear in about a million layers of toilet paper, double bagging, then hiding them in the sanitary towel bin and then running to work absolutely mortified.

I honestly thought I’d be arrested on some kind on indecency/obscene charge! On my way home I was so wracked with guilt I ducked back into the scene of crime to check up on it. Oh the shame, still mortified

Don’t sweat the small stuff OP.

We’ve all done it

...are you the poo troll? I have never not been able to wait even when it hurts...

Also it's not illegal to dispose of shit in bins

At least you didn’t shit directly in the bin.

I believe you, @SpectacularlyEmbarrassed.

I’ve had two very embarrassing poo experiences that stand out in my memory many years down the track. I still shudder when I think about them. Especially because I’m pretty sure my actions did not escape the attention of those in the vicinity.

For what it’s worth, while you’re embarrassed now it sounds like you did the best you could and disposed of it. Wash your hands of the experience (no pun intended) and move on knowing he’ll be none the wiser.

@Saltedcaramel78 Oh, god. Costa. That reminds me of another mortifying experience. Stupid bowels.

Careful, I read they can now DNA test dog poo to prove where it came from to charge the owners so will be able to do the same with human poo.

Imagine the shame when that hits the local papers!

I thought you could leave dog poo in normal bins these days anyway? Not r3ally any different.

How would anyone know you put shit in a bin? Even CCTV would just see you putting a towel in the bin. And I doubt if someone did know you had they'd dispute you putting a shitty towel in the bin

Shit Happens

@BMW6 🤣

Careful, I read they can now DNA test dog poo to prove where it came from to charge the owners so will be able to do the same with human poo. Imagine the shame when that hits the local papers! This is precisely what I've been worrying about, @Gingerkittykat. That, and DP finding out.

Saltedcaramel I'm afraid your awful experience makes me feel slightly better.

AnotherPhantom, thank you. I'm still worrying about it today, but now worrying about whether DP will find out some way other than a council official knocking on his door to ask if the pooing woman lives there.

@BlackPrism It's not often that I have to go then and there. Generally only when there's something a bit wrong internally.

Shame, I couid have used it on my roses...

A bit off the point, but DP sounds a bit wearusime, OP.... just saying "fine thanks" rather than "Actually I've got a D&V bug - I hope you'll be OK, as they are so infectious". And suggest you go home, or otherwise show interest in both your health!

you've got kids and he is presumably in his late 40s or older like you - doesn't that level of privacy seem a bit much? I wouldn't want a man who was too buttoned-up to talk about poo in a reasonable way, at his age!

Wearisome!

I once had to poo in a hedge alongside a footpath whilst heavily pregnant. It was a shrubbery type hedge, and pretty large, so I was able to get actually in the hedge and out of view.

Which was fine until I wanted to get out of said hedge, and a retired couple had decided to make lengthy small talk with DP who was valiantly trying to position himself to stop them seeing into the hedge, resulting in them circling each other while I crouched in the hedge and prayed. For what seemed like hours.

If I managed that OP, your carrier bag will be fine