To be worried about leaving a poo in a bin?

[SpectacularlyEmbarrassed]

NC for this one, for reasons that will become clear.

I stayed with DP last night (we don't live together, as we both have DC and also like to retreat to our own space). He has a small house and just one loo (as do I, FWIW, which is not much - just for context).

During the night he came down with food poisoning (? Assume so). He was up all night with D&V.

I thought I had escaped, but early morning was gripped by a sudden and violent need to poo. Then and there. However, DP was locked in the bathroom, throwing up.

I had a few minutes to ponder this one, but the short version is that I went downstairs, did the poo in an old towel and wrapped it in several Sainsbury's bags. I then crept out and stuck the well-wrapped poo in a council litter bin at the side of the house.

I can just about live with this. But I'm now in a state of horrendous anxiety in case I was caught on the council's CCTV leaving a bagged-up poo in one of their bins. I have visions of being arrested. I did wrap it up very well so no poor bin person would have been confronted with the evidence, but the bins have notices on them about not depositing household waste. AIBU to worry about being arrested for poo-depositing?

I didn't confess to DP, as he would have been so very shocked. I'm shocked myself, but I don't see that I had any alternative.

@XingMing, if he had a garden or even a yard, it would have been al fresco, believe me.

Thank you all for making me feel better. I am sure I am overthinking it, but it has been preying on my mind since 6AM.

Why didn't you ask bf to come out and use a bucket so you could go in? You had time to find an old towel after all. Where did you put the loo roll? Actually where did you get loo roll from if he was in bathroom?

Been there done that if it makes you feel any better

There is no way they go through that CCTV without cause so unless you also left 5kg of cocaine in the bin I'm pretty sure you're fine.

*MerryMarigold It gets worse, honestly. He was so not well, and he's such a private person that I couldn't bring myself to hoik him out of the bathroom (he is absolutely the reverse of the 'man flu' type man: he wouldn't say anything if he was dying). I had only a few minutes to work out my strategy, but I knew I couldn't just poo in the bed. I knew where all the towels were, as they were drying in the utility room. To compound the horror, I also used a pillow case as loo roll. I am even more ashamed to say this.

@Halfdonga I do. I've been on MN for about 16 years. I thought it perhaps best to NC for this one, though.

Oh hi poo troll

@babysharkah It does make me feel better. Thank you.

@CripsSandwiches PMSL. Or Poo MSL.

@Babblepook If you think I'm the poo troll, report me to MNHQ. I think you'll find they will tell you I'm a long standing regular who happens to have had a rather embarrassing experience. Unfortunately.

I mean, this isn't radically different to someone with a baby having to dispose of a shitty nappy because of a poorly timed explosion, right?!

Is this a new relationship? I’d have kicked him out or confessed and laughed about it. But been with DH 10 years and he’s already seen me give birth so...

What was the alternative? A plate? Sock? The garden?

3 years. But he would definitely be shocked and horrified. As he's such a private person, it has been clear all along that he can't cope with his boundaries being breached. I'm happy to accede to that. But it means I have to keep my poo problems to myself. He never even told me he'd been throwing up all night...

@Bouledeneige a plate 🤣🤣🤣

Ahhhh, don’t give it a second thought! Poo is gone!

My husband got done for putting a bag of litter from our car in a bin after eating his lunch in a lay-by.

I hope you and your friend are both feeling better tonight, what a horrid night you both had.

You're okay OP, you can tell them it isn't household waste, it's human waste.

Our bins don't have that sign on them which is good because on a weekly basis very occasionally I put food which has past it's 'use by' date in them (in a Sainsbury's bag of course) rather than in my relatives bin.

An ex BF had to supply a poo sample when he had food poisoning. He pooed on the plate then shovelled it in the jar provided by the doctors.

Wasn't too keen on dining at his place for a while.

But he did eat frogs legs at a dodgy pretend posh local restaurant my parents took us both too! So I felt a bit guilty.

My ex had an aged and very disreputable great aunt, who used to run a Blackpool B&B. She had a small building job done and, being too mean to pay for proper waste disposal, gave out carrier bags containing one brick each to everyone she knew - even some of the guests

Given that each bag-holder was asked to put them in a public bin of their choice, I don't imagine you'll need to worry too much about your towel, OP

TSS what? Whatever justification was there for that?

My husband got done for putting a bag of litter from our car in a bin after eating his lunch in a lay-by.

Why did he have a bag of cat litter with him?

Why did he wait until after he had eaten to bin it?

Who reported him for that?

Who did he get done by?

I love the anonymity of MN. OP I'm feeling for you and laughing at the same time. So glad to hear I'm not the only one this kind of thing happens to.

@TSSDNCOP
So who is the litter bin in a lay-by meant to be used by? I would have thought it was precisely for people who ate their lunch there and put the litter in the bin. If he was supposed to take it home with him then what the heck is the bin for?

I wouldn't have paid a fine for that. I'd go to court and see what a judge decided.