Zebra crossings

[TheZebraCrosser]

I was under the impression that when driving, stopping to let a pedestrian cross on a zebra crossing (white stripes on road, big flashing Belisha beacons) was in fact mandatory, not discretionary.

So why did some twat in a van holler 'could have put your hand up to say thank you you ignorant sod' as I (a pedestrian) sauntered across the other day.

I have noticed (as a motorist) that more and more pedestrians are now scuttling across zebra crossings almost apologetically while mouthing thank you s and waving.

This is all very well and sweet of them but it leaves me a bit bemused as they have a right to cross anyway.

I'm wondering now, if, when I get to the end of temporary traffic lights, would I be advised to 'thank' the person waiting at the other end for not jumping the red light? To thank someone for giving way at a roundabout if you gave right if way anyway?

And then there are people who step out into the road with no crossing at all without so much as batting an eyelid and scream abuse if you don't dodge them by a wide enough margin.

Help needed.

The Highway Code is quite clear that vehicles only have to stop if someone has started to cross. I know that, it's basic roadcraft.

I always stop if they are waiting though because I am also a pedestrian.

I usually say thankyou, if only to encourage more drivers to do so. So few do. It's common courtesy to say thank you.

I'm not the only one

Only one person has told posters to fuck off.

Isn't it ironic that pp are so concerned with politeness given the responses on this thread?

Ah but Soup- I'm autistic, I have little control over what I say, so it doesn't count.

See Sirzy's post above if you don't believe me.

I don't wave at people when i cross zebra crossings. I have better things to be doing like carrying my shopping, controlling my dog, watching where i am going. When drive I don't expect to be waved at right, left and centre. I am standing with the OP on this one. There was a thread like this some time ago and my stance was the same.

🙄

OP got verbally abused by a man in a vehicle. That is scary tbh, it disconcerts me when it used to happen (not so much now I'm older though).

Pretty much all responses have said op was in wrong, very little sympathy about encounter with aggressive man.

Even a suggestion she should cut him slack as he may have had a disability that made him wind his window down and shout at her.

MN is shit sometimes.

OP, I think it's worth highlighting that you mentioned Asperger's syndrome upthread as being the reason you find eye contact difficult. No dramas about that, and not what people are reacting to I think.

Of course it is not appropriate for people to shout at you on a crossing for not acknowledging them stopping!
My view is that the point chemenger and others have made is absolutely right - that verbally acknowledging or giving a little wave thank you even for things people are mandated / obligated to do for us is a positive thing to do that makes society better.

I possibly wouldn't have put it as strongly as some have here, but you will definitely find that if you take a legalistic approach to an issue like this, many people will be baffled. Many people will view it as an unnecessarily unpleasant attitude to take.

Personally, as a pedestrian, I give a little smile and wave at every point where a driver stops for me unless it's traffic lights with an automated 'green man' that is incidental / baked into the sequence of the lights. That includes T junctions, zebra crossings, on-demand pelican crossings etc etc.

Yesterday I waved at a taxi driver who stopped to let me cross in the Lidl car park, and who then let me cross again when I rounded the corner to the road - we both chuckled - it was a nice moment!

So I guess yes OP, of course you are entirely within your rights to only say thank you when someone does something for you they are not obliged to do. And people around you are entirely within their rights to think that this is suboptimal.

You posted in AIBU - long story short, my vote is YAB-legally correct, but YABU.

Soup, was looking forward to watching you work your way out of that.

As a PP pointed out, you can't have it both ways.

I always give a wave when someone gives way for me at a Zebra Crossing.

I get more frustrated with drivers who are rude on the road especially when they are driving past parked cars and you give way despite it being your ROW and they don't acknowledge or thank you

Yep. This. And also people who have ROW but by using that ROW mean they block the road for those who don't. So, they are not overtaking parked cars but are stuck in a traffic queue. They could wait, and not block the road, but they have ROW so stop parallel to the line of parked cars meaning no one can move. Wankers.

Soup, was looking forward to watching you work your way out of that.

What are you on about?

Wow @ calling op a cunt, because she didn't wave thank you at a car and the man inside shouted at her.

These threads never cease to boggle me.

OP, you're not a cunt. The aggression on this thread is similar to that from drivers probably, comes from a feeling of untouchability. One is because anon, one is because in big metal tin.

It’s interesting actually. At a Pelican crossing, you wouldn’t thank a driver for stopping once the light changed to red, because we know it’s a legal requirement for the driver to stop. But actually the driver has the same obligation to stop as at a zebra crossing, so why do we see it differently?

And actually, at a zebra crossing, I personally don’t expect a pedestrian to thank me, as I’m just obeying the rules of the road. (I’d probably thank a driver for stopping for me, though.)

Garth agree

And yet you see hardly any threads on that

It's pedestrians and cyclists people really hate

The aggression on this thread is similar to that from drivers probably, comes from a feeling of untouchability. One is because anon, one is because in big metal tin.

The OP has been aggressive and insulting.

But actually the driver has the same obligation to stop as at a zebra crossing, so why do we see it differently?

A driver legally has to stop at the red light. A driver has to stop at a zebra crossing only when a pedestrian has started to cross.

She wasn't aggressive and insulting to the man and he yelled at her.

The MN response on balance is that she was in the wrong.

I'm not surprised she's getting angry and upset, and now she's been called a cunt.

Early on at least one poster said they would shout at her too.

It's been suggested the man behaved as he did due to disability and she is not being fair on him.

I mean what a load of shit.

Also, Her behaviour on this thread is being used to justify the man shouting at her

Which is very weird logic indeed

I think the general "MN response" is that both were wrong. He shouldn't have shouted abuse, she could have raised a hand. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Loads of threads go this way these days, when the "thread theme named" poster suddenly blows up and it all goes weird. It's odd.

That’s a very pedantic way of looking at it. A pedestrian is about to cross at a zebra crossing, the driver is obliged to stop. Otherwise, how do you interpret ‘started to cross’? One toe slightly into the road or the pedestrian already well into crossing the road? If the latter, then what’s the point of there being a zebra crossing at all?

It’s still the case that the driver is supposed to slow down at a zebra crossing and look out for pedestrians who are looking to cross the road.

I'm not saying that her rudeness to the man justifies being called a cunt. Her behaviour towards other posters - many of whom have patiently tried to explain why her lack of acknowledgement might be seen as rude (nothwithstanding van mans rudeness) - has been cuntish

Well one of these days you’ll end up run over if you don’t start looking before you cross. But it’s always polite to thank someone when they are waiting for you specifically. If they are waiting for a light to change no you don’t need to thank them but if they are giving way (even when the road rules require them to) you thank them.