What is the biggest BS story someone has told you?

[TripleHFa]

In school a friend claimed he was sat on the side of the road and a guy in a car drove past and took his DR pepper.

I used to know someone who always claimed to have had whatever illness someone else had. Eventually we started off a conversation about someone who had rigor mortis. Sure enough, this person claimed to have had that one as well.

acis slipknot is a band that used to wear freaky masks.

Very random!

I was 10 years old, in school one day, when someone told all of us that their Uncle was the famous musician Eric Clapton. I said ‘it was really said that Conner died’ as coincidentally there had been something on the tv and my Mum had told me what had happened and it made me cry, a lot. Friend said ‘who’s Conner?’ It was never mentioned again. (And no chance of a ‘maybe it’s true’ I know all the family, mum and dads side lol)

The father of my second child lied about literally everything. Turned out (when dd2 was 18 months) that he’d lied about his name, age, family background, health, occupation - you name it, he’d made it up. To the point where I’d been having online conversations with his friends/family for years, and it turned out that all those people I’d ‘spoken’ to were actually him .

I think it’s fair to say he is the king of BS.

Oh god I had someone like that. Whatever you had, he'd had it 100 x worse.

Including PCOS. Which when he twigged what it was, claimed it wasn't him, it was his fictional girlfriend who had it. But he felt like he was going through it too...🙄 🙄 🙄

When I was at school and about 8 I made up a younger sister. The lie went on for ages until I had a sleepover and my friends twigged. I blame being a lonely only child and all my friends had younger siblings so I felt left out 😂

That they screamed in the Sistine Chapel

My old boss used to lie ALL THE TIME.

I was a youngster back then, so didn't used to say anything, but I wish it was now so I could speak up. 2 of the biggest bs stories I remember:

1. Alan Sugar told her she had taught him everything he knows about women in business 😂 (she was on 18k - tbf a fair bit at the time, in a shitty industrial town in the NW)
2. She was in a restaurant in Paris and Madonna was there, she had her picture took with her, but her friend had it and she wasn't really that interested in Madonna anyway, she was chatting more to the producers of the album because she was into the music production more than Madonna 😂😂😂

Lots more, but they're the two that I always remember.

chihuahua
I might have to dip back into classics for that one

My old manager was fantasist,she had this imaginary millionaire businessman boyfriend.She was rumbled when she brought a photo of him into work and a colleague recognised him as a minor actor from a television programme 😂

@bebe I couldn't resist

We had been to a children’s party and a group of us decided to go for a coffee afterwards.

Last minute thing, no obligation to come or not. Just a shout round to everyone that we were off to the local coffee shop.

One of the mums told us in detail that the bags were packed and her dh and her other Dd were waiting at home suitcases in the car and as soon as they got back they were off to Tenerife.

We had one coffee then disbanded. I walked into the local Tesco and met woman who was supposed to be on her way to Tenerife.

Apparently when they got home they decided against the holiday as it was too much hassle.

My Ex, I now realise, is a complete narcissist He used to lie to make himself seem more interesting/important than the sad fuck he actually is. Once told me the scar on his bum was when he was shot with an air rifle by the angry boyfriend of a girl he slept with. Turns out he had a mole removed...

@purplecatshopaholic that made me laugh out loud!! What an idiot!

In the days before email or mobile phones, phoning someone on their landline was often the best way to reach them. My Cuban friend (who'd told us a number of tall tales) said he lived alone and that the woman who sometimes answered his phone was the cleaner. She didn't speak much English, so he may have thought he could get away with it. Perhaps he was ashamed that his mum couldn't speak English, or that he still lived with her at the age of 27, or maybe he was afraid of having his other lies exposed.

After somebody told me she was really his mother, I started having longer chats with her, since I know some Spanish. From then on, whenever he said anything remotely suspicious (even if I didn't know for a fact that it was untrue), I would roll my eyes at him and say, "That isn't what your cleaner tells me!"

In the 80's a girl at my school said her dad had booked Diana Ross for her birthday....

That she mounted the kerb and ran over an old lady on a driving lesson, and was banned from driving but only in Bournemouth.
If she sees this, yes, your stories are all bullshit and god knows why anyone believes a word you say.

I lived in a shared house with a guy who told us he was a session musician (guitarist) and used to play with led zeppelin. Strange thing is, he didn't have any instruments.

He got caught claiming benefits as a single person although he was living with his girlfriend, then went on to tell us he was working in the fraud department of the benefits agency. My new boss had just left there, and had only heard of him in conduction with his fraudulent claim, he certainly would not have got a job there. I later saw him working on a building site.

There were loads of other things he said, for no reason, all of which were obviously untrue. Thankfully his quite lovely girlfriend eventually saw through him and dumped him.

A few years ago a friend of a friend always seemed to have some bullshit and anything you told him he already knew.

Friend and I decided to try him at his own game.

So we, over a couple of days came up with some absolute bullshit, two I can remember.

Friend: "Did you know the capital of outer mongolia is my arse?"
Bullshitter:"I think you'll find it's pronounced My-Ass"

Me: "Mathematically speaking an egg is actually a square"
"Random person overhearing this:"Er how?"
Bullshitter: "Oh yes, well known fact that"

An old colleague (who was extremely senior) was just full to the absolute brim of ridiculous stories! It was a while ago but the ones that spring to mind are that she once swam a marathon; she used to be a paratrooper with the Swedish army ; once a senior member of the royal family came to meet her husband at work and he was dressed in rags to avoid being recognised....and many many more. These stories were very embellished and you'd have to sit nodding along and feigning amazement for about 30 minutes until you could escape. Very bizarre.

Friend of husband told him that he did in fact own a house but that he and his wife rent it out even though they live with parents as a family of four. Could be the truth but unlikely. Same friend claimed to have a Range Rover, never saw any pictures and never drove it to meet us. Strange when he actually had a very nice Mercedes which obviously was plastered all over their social media.

Met a boy when I was younger who told me he was a carpenter. He actually worked at McDonalds and had only completed a few months at college to study carpentry and quit. Never worked as a carpenter or had the qualifications of one.

A friend of mine caught herpes from his boyfriend and was raging at him (bf used to go cottaging a lot). Bf said he'd been feeding squirrels in the park and one bit him and that must be how he got herpes 🐿

A guy I used to work with was off because his dad had died. Very sad, but he was of the age where this was likely. He was off for about a month or so all told. A short time later, his dad appeared in the shop, asking for his son, the manager(!). He was a sales assistant, just like the rest of us. This blatant lie didn't cause him any embarrassment.

About a year later, he was off because his son had died. Very sad. Then it came out that he had had time off from his last job because his son had died and then was sacked when said son turned up to hand in a sick note. This time, said son arrived in our shop to hand in a sick note. I cannot imagine how anyone could think telling lies like that is okay.

He then went AWOL, didn't answer the phone or emails and finally was confronted in yet another job and was finally sacked from the job where I knew him from.

A colleague who has serious issues strung our whole team along with takes of his son, who lived with him in his house, which was luckily next door to his parents. The mother had left and returned to Latvia years previously, but was now suddenly starting a custody battle and he was afraid DS would be taken to Latvia and he wouldn't see him.

Of course we were all sympathetic, and gave advice where we could. He left work early several times to pich his DS up from school etc etc.

Then another colleague invited him and his DS to a bbq, to meet her similarly aged kids. He accepted, then the day before arrived at work saying his DF had collected the son from school the day before, and on the way home had hit a tractor and the DS had died.

He was at work 'to give him something to think about'. Turns out another colleague knew his family vaguely, did some digging with mutual friends, no son, no house, still lived with his parents. Complete fantasist.

When he was confronted he was frighteningly angry at being caught out - to the point I was never comfortable working with him again. But others often heard him starting to tell new colleagues all about his son (miraculously alive again) before being called out by someone he'd tricked.

Also a friend in college where we were on a small course - about 15 of us - told everyone she never wore clothes that showed her shoulders because she had scars all over her back from an industrial accident she was in when her mum took her to work in a factory as a toddler. We were very sympathetic. (but appalled by her mum) Then she started having 'gene therapy' to heal the scars. It was successful and she started to wear strappy tops. Then our course covered gene therapy and how it works. In great detail. Her face was a picture as everyone just turned and looked at her. She also told us she was adopted and treated really badly in comparison to her older non adopted sister. Again, thought her family were pretty crap, then saw a pic of her, her sister and her mum, you couldn't tell them apart. Many others, but I can't remember them.

Like Spike Milligan's dad said, would you rather have a boring truth or an entertaining lie?