What is the biggest BS story someone has told you?

[TripleHFa]

In school a friend claimed he was sat on the side of the road and a guy in a car drove past and took his DR pepper.

@81Byerley you can conceive after having a trachelectomy (removal of cervix) you just have a few really good stitches. However it is very precarious and the risk of miscarriage and premature birth are insanely high.

Not saying she's telling the truth but she might not be lying..

“I’d never cheat on you” ha, bullshit.

Had a few drinks in the pub with a friend. When we met him the next week, he said after he’d walked home he’d found a woman in the corridor outside his flat. Apparently the woman was a prostitute who had gone to see someone else in the building but they weren’t answering the door. Apparently my friend did the gentlemanly thing and took her into his flat. Apparently he was then soooo good in bed she didn’t charge him as she’d enjoyed his company so much

My DD had a charismatic and brilliant history teacher beloved of all the girls in school. They adored her. She told the school and pupils that she had cancer and was dying which caused immense distress. This went on for over a year before it was discovered she was lying.

Never got my head round why anyone would want to do that to children.

These are so odd!

At school a friend of mine told everyone Nigel Mansell was her uncle. We were all in awe, especially as she once brought some gravel to school with her that Uncle Nigel had picked up for her from the Le Mans track. We all had a piece of this gravel and treasured it. I bumped into her in my hometown a few years back and asked about Nigel Mansell. She burst out laughing and told me it was a lie and she had no idea why she’d said it.

My ex said he has never been married. Turns out he had been and was married the whole time we were together. They were separated but still communicated through out my pregnancy and when LO was born. Only found out once we had separated. He still carried on lying even though I had been sent a copy of the marriage license from her!!!

When my eldest Dd gave birth in hospital her (then) dp popped to the shop. On his return he said he had met a begger on London Bridge and he gave him 50p, then apparently the begger stripped off his begging clothes to reveal a pinstriped suit. He then said "thanks mate" before jumping into a ferrari and driving off. I sat there and thought OMG what a plonker.

MeltedCrayons That was a fascinating and heartbreaking story. I’m so sorry you went through that. And are still suffering. Thanks for sharing .

In my teens, my best friend’s mum faked an entire pregnancy. She also used to tell everyone she was a nurse when she wasn’t. She was an overbearing narcissist and I eventually extricated myself from the friendship with her daughter because I couldn’t bear to be around her. Absolute fantasist.

Lots of things all from the same person - I have never called her out on it in case she is the unluckiest person ever but everything goes wrong. Long journey - car puncture, break down. Unexpected massive bill. Removal men don't turn up, the supermarket delivery does arrive on time ever. Last winter (their summer) she went to Adelaide and it snowed which ruined her holiday and the flight there and back were both delayed.

'I have a tumour on my lung', followed by all the treatments he had been having.
My dad died in the Falklands war.
I was born on a roundabout.
Etc. Etc. All from my husband, who doesn't know the lies from truth.

My cousin once told me that she got drunk with a group of friends and broke into the zoo and stole a penguin. They apparently took it home and put it in the bath and her friends were trying to give it vodka but she intervened. They abandoned it in a park early the next morning and called RSPCA anonymously to go and collect it.

She's full of stories like this and seems completely oblivious to the fact that everyone knows she's lying.

A neighbour told me she had had breast cancer.

She didn't. She had a cyst.

She also told me she was an accountant.

She wasn't. She worked in an office that managed payroll.

She told me our housing association was performing an illegal eviction on her because she had missed 1 months rent. They hadn't paid their rent for months and months and months. I found that out when she asked me to help her sort out her appeal against the eviction.

I was bloody glad when they moved.

A friend of my DD used to say she owned the large mansion at the end of the road. She also said she had a 21!year old brother and that she was a twin and the twin died. All made up. She was 16 when she said it. I mentioned something to her mum and she said “oh she makes things up all the time. I was the same at her age”. Really strange

I went to uni about 100 miles from home, didn’t know anyone apart from a friend of a friend who was doing a different course who I’d met a couple of times. Other girl lived in halls with some of my friends off my course, so we’d occasionally come across each other. There was some issue with her borrowing money and not giving it back and some quite odd behaviour. She told everyone that her mum was dying of cancer, and people of course rallied round her and lent her money and supported her.

In the summer holidays I met up with our mutual friend, the two of them were family friends and had grown up together. I said ‘oh gosh I’m so sorry to hear that x’s mother has cancer, how is she?’
She was had seen her that morning. It transpired that it had all been a lie and that the other girl had just stolen the money. Was awful. Was especially bad as another of the the girls in our friendship group had genuinely lost her mother to cancer earlier that year.

When I was at school, a friend (known for attention seeking) told us that at her previous school when they had had sex education classes the video player for the educational film hadn’t worked so the couple giving the lesson ‘showed them’ what sex was on a mattress found in a supply closet. She also once claimed to have answered a ringing phone in a phone box and inadvertently embroiled herself in a drug drop off that ultimately involved her sneaking out of the house at night disguised as a man in her dad’s clothes, picking up the drugs and then delivering them to the police.

The strange thing was, her stories were so obviously untrue that the rest of us couldn’t believe she thought we would be taken in by them. She told me the drugs one when I was in the car with my dad, and I remember cringing for her because the lie was so obvious, and it was so embarrassing that she expected us to believe it.

A girl at school once told me she used to have a Scottish accent but then she fell down the stairs and lost it. She also said her parents couldn't remember whether she was born in Scotland or Japan. When questioned she said it was because she was born on the aeroplane

I used to get the same train to work as this young woman who claimed she got up at 4 am and walked 2.5 hours to the station from another town every day for dubious sounding financial reasons. She also mentioned she owned a car and yet she was walking 5 hours a day to get a train?

She would also tell sob stories (mums been admitted with chest pains and the hospital won't talk to her/dad's in the army, was killed in Iraq and she has to go and pick up his ashes from some department) and then immediately after would say she had no money for her bus fair to college or to buy lunch and ask for a handout. A few weeks after the dad story I heard her telling someone else about how she was going to her dad's for Sunday lunch, pretty impressive culinary skills for a box of ashes!

She overall gave me a bad feeling and I was really relieved she didn't get the same train home as me. I was terrified of her trying to follow me and learning where I live.

That the £36,000 car parked in drive was a hire car and his was getting his wheels fixed. It wasn’t he had secretly bought it.

I’m still married to him

An ex colleague. He was separated from his wife, with whom he had a young daughter, who he was having real issues accessing. We all sympathized with him as he had had to move back into his mum's house following the split, to raise the money to pay legal fees for access.

Months later, we started seeing each other. All good.

Until his wife phoned me at work. She wasn't an ex at all. He lived at home with her and his DD and left his wedding ring in the car every day. So he hadn't only lied to me, but all his colleagues too.

Worse, his wife told me he had done this before. Told her he had a job working away during the week, and shacked up with someone else. The OW thought he worked weekends with days off in the week.

And his wife STILL took him back! He left our employer soon after, having taken a week off with a "back injury". I had (helpfully) managed to give the boss advance notice, about the planned back injury though, the week before, so work wasn't too in the shit.

Last I heard, he and his "ex" had moved house for a "fresh start"

just thought of one more. Yesterday middle DS mentioned playing squash with a colleague and asked his older brother if he wanted to play squash. My eldest DS replied. “Oh I already play squash”. We were a bit surprised as he lives at home and had never to my knowledge played squash. We asked him to elaborate and he said he played with Johnathan at the Gym. Elaborating further he said Johnathan offered this as part of his personal training. But we all knew it wasn’t true. Eventually he smiled and said he was joking. They are the weirdest ones when there is literally no reason to lie

At university a girl told me that her boyfriend owned a helicopter and used to fly over to see her for weekends.

We were at Oxford. He lived in New York, and apparently flew over the Atlantic ....in a helicopter...for the weekend.

I was born on a roundabout

Just. Why?