To be fair, I've always been a perfectionist and have a lot to show due to this trait, such as very high exam grades, etc. but I do very much know the negatives to being too much of a perfectionist and I'm very much a planner which means I'm always living in the future rather than the present or past (which is definitely not good for mental health..!) but anyway, went away on holiday with a male friend for a few days last month and he's a very laid back, optimistic, take charge, child at heart kind of guy (in his early 30s) whereas I'm mid-20s..
He found the following behaviours odd/annoying:
- At the airport for our flight, we were HOURS early and obviously beyond a certain point/security line, the airport staff ask passengers to throw away water bottles etc. so I suggested waiting on that side to gradually finish my entire 1.5L water bottle (had about 500ml left) because:
- It was a very hot day
- Buying water beyond the security line at the airport is 4x the cost of in the supermarket
- We were hours early so waiting before the security line for a bit or after it makes zero differences considering we still had around 2 hours left till the plane..
... He gave me a weird look and implied I was being stupid/immature (not in those words though) to try and "save water" in such a weird way.
-
We got separate hotel rooms - I did a bit of meal prep and offered he could come and share some of it - he agreed and when he came in, he had the food I made and then opened the last large unopened bottle of water I had left (for the day after for the airport) under my desk so it's ready which I bought.. not asking permission.. literally saying "I'm going to have this water, opening it and then chugging down at least a litre of it" when he knows the tap water is drinkable, etc. (though he is a nice person in that I'm sure he would not be offended at all if I went to his room and did the same behaviour but still, surely it's obvious that not everyone will have the same approach he does).
-
We agree to meet at the hotel lobby at 9.50 the next day in our holiday - we got back the last evening about midnight so I struggled to get up but still did as we agreed that time and got ready by the time we agreed. I texted him, phoned him, etc. and no answer - he replied 1.5 hours later saying he'd turned off the alarm and went back to sleep.. would have been nice to tell/text me that so I could have done the same...! He defended himself saying that after we agreed on the time, he said no rush in the text before saying goodnight (but I took that to mean no rush as in we were starting days at like 8.30am on days previously so this is a no-rush 9.50 start.. not 11.30..!
-
He always takes the mick if I try to save costs on things or if I look at an item in the store for a while (not because I wanna buy it but just because I find the item interesting) and then not buy it but as far as I'm concerned, having different financial backgrounds, etc. I'm entitled to spend as I choose.
-
If we buy different food items at a cafe, he'll offer a bite of whatever he's got and if I say no thanks, he'll insist at least 4-5 times EVERY time for me to try some of it which is a massive headache.. even if I say I have intolerance to the product or just not a fan of the product (If I offer him any of my food, he'll usually say yes straight away 99% of the time)
I definitely know I'm FAR from perfect and have various character flaws but am I ridiculously in the wrong here or is it because he's a guy he thinks like this? or just different personalities? I know none of his behaviours/reactions are terrible but it becomes really grating when it's all the time..!