Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask what to reply to this (naturist) painter

104 replies

doesthiseemright · 22/05/2019 16:26

So, I had a painter come around to give me a quote for a refresh of pretty much the whole inside of the house. He had been recommended to me by friends of my Husband and I had been warned that he likes to strip off a bit when it's hot. Little did I know.

We were going into each room and he was making small talk whilst I told him what we needed doing and he asked me if I had any hobbies. I thought this a bit odd but just mentioned a few of my mundane interests and politely asked him if he had any. Turns out yes, indeed, he certainly has a hobby - he is a naturist-- and by the way, he does all of his painting in the nude. Hmm, I thought about this and said "well each to his own" and asked how that works with safety, being in rooms with no curtains etc and was told that he does actually wear socks. He said he sometimes puts up drop cloths and his wife doesn't like him being a naturist so he does it at work.

He asked if it would be a problem and I was unsure of what to say so I said if he was upstairs painting away and I was downstairs out of his way or out for the day, if it made him comfortable and he did a good job then it wouldn't bother me. (apparently, he is very good). I then said I wasnt sure what my Husband would think - and he replied "well, you dont have to tell him. If you don't, I won't"

So I packed him off to write me a quote and let me know. I was thinking I'd just wait for the quote and decide what to do from there. And told my Husband, who laughed. A lot.

Then, an hour later I get a text saying "nice to meet you this morning and thanks for being so understanding about my naturism". I just replied "no worries".

Now, a few hours later I have a new text "would it be possible for me to call around and have a naturist tea break with you?"

er????????????????????????

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 22/05/2019 17:10

Will he be using Farrow and Balls?

Cocolapew · 22/05/2019 17:10

It wouldn't bother you having a naked stranger in your house Hmm? Really?

doesthiseemright · 22/05/2019 17:11

@worraliberty, funnily enough, he made a point of saying he doesn't like painting with Farrow and Ball Shock

OP posts:
VictoriaBun · 22/05/2019 17:11

It will be our little secret. like fuck it will

Summerorjustmaybe · 22/05/2019 17:12

I could send my ex. We uses to joke he was hung like a paint roller!
I kid you not.
Blush

KC225 · 22/05/2019 17:13

I would love him to do a 'naturist' quote for brother and SIL they laugh like drains. Your DH's friend is alradu dining out on this story, I bet.

Bwekfusth · 22/05/2019 17:13

What the fuck 😂 what did you reply in the end?

doesthiseemright · 22/05/2019 17:16

I haven't replied yet.
To be honest, he has probably done me a favour texting me as I don't think the reality of it hit me until he said he would come around for a cuppa.

OP posts:
CupoTeap · 22/05/2019 17:23

The comment about not telling your dh tipped me over

TheRedBarrows · 22/05/2019 17:24

It sounds like one of those 70s comedy porn films.

I see MN is well ahead with double entendres.

Add ‘dip my stiff bristles in the pot’ ‘oooh that’s a lovely undercoat ‘ ‘it’s very wet ‘ “where’s my sugar soap? I like to take it up the ladder’

You’d have studio audience ringing in your ears all day.

madcatladyforever · 22/05/2019 17:27

For fuck sake sake I've been a naturist for 30 years and there is no way this is normal behaviour. You don't inflict your naked V body on other people in their homes. He sounds like a pervert to me.

DishingOutDone · 22/05/2019 17:28

Trades. Always after tea. Wink

Sagradafamiliar · 22/05/2019 17:30

He wants you to play a role in his fetish.

tolerable · 22/05/2019 17:33

give your husband the phone n leave him to deal with it.make sure his swinger mates are on speed dial-unless thats your scene thats a manky recommend

DishingOutDone · 22/05/2019 17:33

Say yes but can my parents come and strip off with you, they're in their 70s but its something they've always wanted to do.

StormTreader · 22/05/2019 17:33

Agree to it and have your husband greet him at the door starkers "Oh Does had to pop out so it'll just be us".

RaininSummer · 22/05/2019 17:36

How very strange. If you know a few burly rugby type blokes could you ask them to be there in the buff too for the tea party and see what he thinks. Or, better yet, tell him to jog on.

SquishySquirmy · 22/05/2019 17:38

If this isn't a prank, then he's a creepy pervert who will keep pushing the boundaries.
From your description in the op, he's been steadily pushing your boundaries - starting "small" with admitting to being a naturist as a hobby, and getting more and more inappropriate. Its not his alternative lifestyle that's the problem, it's him wanting to inflict it on others combined with dodgy comments.
Don't let him in your house again, and ask your friend who recommended him wtf. Tell them the whole story as you did here with the text and comments etc so it can't be brushed off as you being a "bit prudish" when "he doesn't like lots of layers when it's hot".

theemmadilemma · 22/05/2019 17:48

Have your friends confirmed he actually painted naked?

HearMeSnore · 22/05/2019 17:59

Get DH to reply with a hairy chest pic:

"I don't think she's keen but I'm right up for it, Bud. You bring the Hobnobs."

Sarahjconnor · 22/05/2019 18:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lllot5 · 22/05/2019 18:48

Must be a joke surely. Your mates are having you on.
Not very funny admittedly but he can’t be doing this every where he goes.

Nyctophilia · 22/05/2019 19:07

Just wait till he shows you his edging skills....

FineWordsForAPorcupine · 22/05/2019 19:35

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

LuckyLou7 · 22/05/2019 20:43

It's a joke, you've been set up by your DH and his friends.The man probably isn't even a painter, let alone a naturist. They will all be guffawing with laughter at the idea of a naked tea party and are eagerly waiting for your response. Piss on their chips right now and don't engage in this nonsense. Ignore it all and find yourself a professional painter and decorator through word of mouth/local newspapers/facebook groups.