ABU to be annoyed at DH ... weekends away

[gingerginger2]

I had to go away for work this weekend fri - monday. I left DH with the two kids. Saturday morning he gets a last minute deal on taking them away for the weekend, and they all go away too. Fair enough thinks I, good on him for taking them away on his own. (But i'm also slightly sad that they've gone away without me while I have to work, but keep that to myself)

We both got back yesterday. Him and kids about 6pm, me at 1030. When I got back the place is a mess (i.e. exactly as I left it plus friday and saturday's mess, plus unpacking and he's playing computer games. Anyway I hold my tongue, because I am chuffed did nice stuff with the kids.

Any way's he's off to work at 7 this morning and I've got kids and school run. To find there's no milk or bread, no clean uniform ,schoolbags have been unpacked and used for trip away, school stuff god knows where, coats in car still etc etc....but I hold my breath and only ringhimtocalmly ask where coats are.

Then tonight when I get back from school run I can't find another few things, including lighter matches in kitchen to make dinner, so i finally crack and ring ring to ask him where it is, get a bit annoyed and say I'ma bit annoyed he's left to pickup all the pieces.

He hangs up on me, won't answer his phone and has texted me to let me know i'm out of order as he's been away all weekend and not had time to do housework

who's being unrerasonable?

it wasn't spotless when I left. I left 6am friday morning and on thursday it had been my 7 year old's birthday. So there was still some presents in the living room , still half a cake in the kitchen, still wrapping paper in bag next to the bin for recycling. and a few dishes in the sink. all of which were untouched when I got back sunday night

He is BU for sitting playing computer games hours after he got back. Why wasn’t he sorting out school bags etc for morning then?

I wouldn’t have expected to walk in and find the place spotless (and I don’t think you did either) but it’s wtong of him to think that entertaining himself and the dc was his only job for the weekend.

He’s also BU for hanging up on you.

Did you bottle up and then explode at him? That’s the only place you may have been unfair, if you did that.

All of which would have taken you 30 mins max to sort on Thu eve OP, but you chose to leave it and then have a go at your OH for not doing it. YABU.

The OP had to go away for work. Her DH chose to go away knowing that all that mess existed and that someone would have to clean it up. He is being an arse.

YukFoo No the OP is annoyed because of the additional mess which built up while she was away. The lack of bread and milk, the children's uniforms not being cleaned or school bags made available, plus I'm guessing there were additional dishes and mess from Friday and Saturday.

Why? Because I have a different opinion? Hah.

YukFoo must be wondering why he is still single.

No need to go all anal about it.

@Yabbers, if he is wondering, he's the only person in the Universe who is.

Why couldn’t he have spent 30 mins Thursday night doing it? Why is it the ops job?

YukFoo why is it OP's job to clear up the additional mess?

OP, your OH has failed miserably. Let him sulk, the pathetic manchild. Gaming instead of getting school stuff ready and getting basics in when you got in at 10.30 pm? Pathetic.

@mummyoflittledragon. I'll leave that to you lot, it will give you something else to shriek at.

Op you are definitely not being unreasonable, your DH is being really selfish. He's assuming that you will do all the work. YukFoo really is one goady fucker

YANBU OP

(Don't feed the troll people.)

NBU but if it was my husband I would leave a detailed list - everything just works better if I do - it's like he doesn't have the organised-female gene but in his defence has absolutely no problem with following a list

You would have to leave a list to remind your husband to make sure there is food for the kids, uniform etc? That's baffling.

Yanbu OP.

Only a completely selfish dick would have his wife come back to that after being working.
What an ass.
My bet is that this is not an isolated incident.
What a looser OP.
You have my full sympathy.

Next time come back on a Monday night, let him sort out school stuff in the morning.

He wasnt working op was-so yes he should clear up

@gingerginger2 I have a sneaking suspicion he went away so he could avoid doing the housework actually. I’m thinking he looked around and thought, “Sod this” then looked for a deal or something.