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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WIBU? - Child waking the street

411 replies

Iltavilli · 21/05/2019 17:24

We live on a cul de sac with a ginnel (alley for non-northerners) at the bottom, so it is often used as a cut through for people walking children to the local schools about half a mile away. Leaving the house this morning around 8am (huge lie in as I normally leave at 6am), a girl of around 7 or 8 was being walked to school by her mum.

The girl was banging what looked like two plastic sticks together, quite loudly, and was shouting “get up, get up, it’s time for school and work” all the way along the street. She was about 100 metres ahead of her mum, but mum was laughing along and not trying to stop her. I said to the girl that some people, like nurses, work at night and need to sleep in the morning so they can take care of people the next night. The girl burst into tears, and as mum got to where we were (outside my house) shouted at me for making her daughter cry.

Given the weather is so warm, and people have windows open to sleep, was I wrong to ask the girl to stop - but also to explain why she should stop?

OP posts:
somecakefather · 23/05/2019 17:12

Its bad parenting not to bring your child up aware of other people

Also, to allow children to have no respect for their neighbours is different from this scenario. I agree that allowing children to have no consideration for neighbours is selfish parenting. I don't think that's the same as the little girl walking down the street singing with two plastic sticks.

WaxOnFeckOff · 23/05/2019 17:27

I don't think that's the same as the little girl walking down the street singing with two plastic sticks.

You keep minimising the OP to suit your agenda better. I agree a little girl walking down the street with two plastic sticks (not banging them) and singing (rather than shouting) wouldn't be bad parenting.

From the OP: "The girl was banging what looked like two plastic sticks together, quite loudly, and was shouting “get up, get up, it’s time for school and work” all the way along the street." Different scenario completely.

somecakefather · 23/05/2019 17:36

You keep minimising the OP to suit your agenda better

Hmm Agenda? I don't think so. I have quite clearly said I think the OP has highly exaggerated her opening OP. No-one else came out to tell the child to shut it. OP happened to be out in the street at the time when she heard this. If she was indoors, she probably wouldn't have even heard it.

Also, she used the words "quite loudly". That doesn't say to me that it was very loud. Out of the whole street, only OP had a problem with it.

WaxOnFeckOff · 23/05/2019 17:46

Well if you say she has exaggerated it then that must be true Hmm.

Just because no-one else came out doesn't mean they weren't woken or annoyed, maybe the OP got there first? If someone has already taken action on something, I don't feel the need to pile on and join in. So, if it had been me in the house getting woken or just disturbed, whether I went out or not would depend on whether I was dressed, whether the parent was there and taking action, whether someone else was already making it stop. I'd be thinking about the scenario, great that someone has stopped that noise, it means I don't have to.

She said "quite loudly" about the sticks and "shouting" about the song. Combined, that's more than just singing and carrying sticks.

Original poster
Iltavilli · 23/05/2019 17:48

@somecakefather as others have stated, you have projected somewhat onto this scenario.

The girl was in no way singing. I don’t expect children to be tuneful in singing so it’s not that, it’s was that she was shouting for people to get up.

I spoke, gently, to her as I was leaving the house, and she was at the bottom of my front garden as I left. We have quite large front gardens and others may have not had the chance to get out of bed / dressed in time.

You were not there, I was. You have repeatedly accused me of lying / exaggerating. I was not. This girl was shouting.

If the scenario (in your head) was that a child was playful down the street, I would have no problem. I already said that secondary school teens walk through with their friends and are reasonably loud, and that I had no problem. This girl was not that scenario.

OP posts:
somecakefather · 23/05/2019 17:53

Iltavilli

Yes she was "quite loud"...so much so that no-one else was remotely bothered by it, only you.

somecakefather · 23/05/2019 17:57

Just because no-one else came out doesn't mean they weren't woken or annoyed

Or didn't care one job about it. Or heard it they didn't and went straight back to sleep

Original poster
Iltavilli · 23/05/2019 17:58

How do you know that no one else was bothered? On what basis are you claiming that? Again, it seems you are projecting with minimal knowledge of the situation.

As I explained. These are relatively large front gardens. For someone who was asleep to get up, dressed and out to the street is not a quick thing.

OP posts:
WaxOnFeckOff · 23/05/2019 17:59

Prove that no-one else was bothered?

Maybe you should post about your own made up scenario so that you get the answers you want?

WaxOnFeckOff · 23/05/2019 18:05

My neighbours were going on holiday in the middle of last year's heat wave, most people therefore sleeping with open windows, neighbours decided to let the kids play excitedly outside, shouting screaming and running around at 3am while they were waiting on their taxi. I shouted out the window to them to shut up. I'm sure I wasn't the only one disturbed, but I got there first. I could definitely have been more polite but given I was tired and naked, that was my resolution. It worked.

If they had simply came out and got in their taxi, i might still have been briefly woken with the engine and door noise but wouldn't have been angry as that is perfectly acceptable noise and I would have dropped off again no doubt. However I was left angry and annoyed that people would be so inconsiderate and anti social as to leave kids out shouting and screaming at 3am. There is a difference depending on the noise and why it's being made.

somecakefather · 23/05/2019 18:08

How do you know that no one else was bothered? On what basis are you claiming that?

Oh I'm sure you would've said if anyone else came out to investigate this one child and 2 plastic sticks racket.

Original poster
Iltavilli · 23/05/2019 18:14

@somecakefather I’ve explained this, more than twice in fact. You absolutely refuse to acknowledge that fact. I’m unsure why you’ve taken this so personally.

OP posts:
WaxOnFeckOff · 23/05/2019 18:18

OP, maybe we need to do a search of someone's property to see if they have any plastic sticks?

Femalebornandbreed · 23/05/2019 18:22

WaxOnFeckOff

We? Are you op ‘friend/sock puppet’?

#besties4life 💕

Original poster
Iltavilli · 23/05/2019 18:24

Ah, the emoji. Of course.

OP posts:
WaxOnFeckOff · 23/05/2019 18:28

Ah, so you can't agree with someone and stick up for them without there being some shenanigans?

In answer, no. I have no idea who the OP is, i haven't researched her profile, private messaged etc and we are not the same person. Feel free to contact MN and ask. I'm not even aware if we've ever posted on the same thread before but then I'm shite with names. What's your relationship with somecakefather?

Femalebornandbreed · 23/05/2019 18:29

OP you get irritated so easily. I just don’t believe it’s as bad as you are making out. I bet things boil your piss regularly and your like a coiled spring Grin

WaxOnFeckOff · 23/05/2019 18:29

Unless you think that I was actually suggesting to the OP that we meet up and look for the sticks?

Femalebornandbreed · 23/05/2019 18:32

Unless you think that I was actually suggesting to the OP that we meet up and look for the sticks?

Wtf? Brilliant! 😂😂😂

PhyllisPearce · 23/05/2019 18:35

If the mother had been parenting her child it wouldn't have ended in tears
Hopefully she will think on next time
And to the posters saying they would have told you to fuck off, seriously? You think your child's unsociable behaviour should be ignored if you can't be bothered to deal with it

Original poster
Iltavilli · 23/05/2019 19:23

@femalebornandbreed unsurprisingly you are reduced to personal attacks. I don’t know WaxOnFeckOff.

Again, like one other, you have taken this personally, without any clear reason. IF you are happy for your children to behave like this, then fabulous. I imagine I’m as glad as many others that you don’t live near me.

OP posts:
somecakefather · 23/05/2019 19:54

IF you are happy for your children to behave like this, then fabulous. I imagine I’m as glad as many others that you don’t live near me

More child bashing OP? Lovely. And you talk about personal attacks?

For your information I've never had any bother with my DC, not in school, at friends houses/sleepovers - always invited back, or out playing. That's probably because my neighbours don't go about making children cry, we understand children. Screaming in the house or out playing/in the garden is not allowed - playing with 2 plastic sticks and shouting singing "quite loudly", while walking down the street is allowed. You'd have a heart attack living in my street in the winter when it snows...all the kids go out before school and play in the snow "quite loudly" for 10 minutes

MrMeSeeks · 23/05/2019 20:16

And screaming with two plastic sticks is allowed of-course it is Hmm

If this had happened by me op i’d have certainly been the same Grin

PhyllisPearce · 23/05/2019 20:19

I don't think the OP is child bashing somecakefather sounds more like bad parent bashing to me

Original poster
Iltavilli · 23/05/2019 20:28

Hello all. There are a couple of posters who seem to have taken this a little too far to heart, and despite any form of reasoned content, are insisting their version of what happened is accurate.

I’ve tried to be clear and helpful, but this has not deterred those with their own interpretation of what happened (claiming that I’m lying and / or exaggerating). Whilst these people have fully demonstrated their opinions and ignorance, I suggest we no longer engage with them. They have suffered collusion, they have suggested lies. They have no interest in actually dealing with the point in question, only their inaccurate spin on this. I suggest the thread is closed.

OP posts: