Talk me out of buying this house!

[RainbowMe]

The husband and I have spent the last five years making our house a home, and we've just got it exactly how we want it. We decided the time was also right to start trying for a baby, and are currently in our second two week wait so far. All being well, the plan is for me to give up work and be a stay at home Mum for a good few years before going back to work and possibly thinking about buying a bigger house.

Everything was ticking along nicely, but then... a house came up for sale that I have dreamed of living in since I was a little girl! I told my husband expecting (hoping) that he would tell me not to be silly etc, but he is now more excited about it than I am

There are many reasons we should not buy this house...

The biggest one is that it would add 80k into the mortgage. It would stretch us to the absolute limit of what we'd be allowed to borrow and would take the stay at home Mum idea completely off the table.

It has no central heating or mains sewage (storage heaters and a log burner; septic tank). I know these things wouldn't be a big deal to many people, but we'd have no money left to get the heating done and the septic tank would worry me (I am a huge worrier).

The house itself is no bigger or nicer than our current one (both smallish three bed houses of around 1000 square feet). Our house has useful things like a garage and a downstairs loo which this one doesn't.

But this one is in a really special location and is very unique for our area. The garden is like a park and there are no neighbours for about 2 miles in either direction (my absolute dream). It kind of feels like a once in a lifetime opportunity. I know there are other rural properties like it, but very few in my "patch". We already live in a very nice village down the road and I know we are very lucky to have what we've got, but it's not the peaceful rural life I dream of. I know this makes me sound like a spoilt brat and is a nice "first world problem" to have. But I just couldn't sleep last night thinking about this house, and now I can't concentrate on my work either

Someone tell me to stop being silly!

Link and name change. Easy peasy.

Well obviously she won't want to put a link up on a busy forum if it's a one in a million dream house she's about to make an offer on, there's a chance she'll be gazumped!

If you don't want to put the link up can you put a few pictures up of the bits you like or dislike

The fact that you don't want to post a link, OP, means you can't hear the thought of anyone else snapping it up. Which to me suggests you should buy it, because you love it.

You don't appreciate its architecture, resale value, location, etc - you love it.

I think that's so important for a house.

BEAR, not hear

I'd definitely say go for a viewing. The house might just not feel right for you when you get there and then you've answered your own question.

Buy the dream house!

Never mind @RainbowMe and it doesn't have to be a 'no' just a not right now. Your house is how you want and you can stick to your plan. In the future circumstances might change and you can get the party on, 1699 style

Two heaped I can't believe how much you spend on fuel! We put about £300 -400 of oil in the tank twice a year (have done it three times this year as my husband has been very ill and skinny, therefore cold!). We get a pick up truck of wood off cuts delivered for £50 and about £60 of coal. That does us all winter for a 3 1/2 bed 300yr old farmhouse that is damn and cold in a very exposed part of the Pennines.

Sorry, meant to say, I don't blame you for not posting a link until you've definitely decided that you're not going to buy the house. You might drum up competition'😄

I'm glad you're going to see it. Sometimes things feel impossible, but you find a way. Or you might realise it's not nearly as nice as you imagined. Life has a way of not going the way you expect it.

@twoheaped - another one who is horrified by the amount of oil you use. We fill our 1000 litre tank about every 6 to 8 months, which is around £500, often less. We also use about £150 worth of coal and wood. Unless you are running an oil fired aga and have your house heated 24 hours a day, I would seriously worry that either your system is very inefficient, or you have got a hole in your tank, or someone's nicking it.

Just to add the tank is never empty when we top up, just about three quarters gone.

To add some things:

• maternity leave in a cold house with a newborn and moneywories is hell.
• 2 miles away from nearest neighbours means you have to drive everywhere, so costs of living go up
• if you work full time you won’t enjoy the house and the big garden as all your spare time will go into

maintaining the garden

• full time nursery is expensive, depending where you are easily £1000. do you have that money?

i think you will curse that house

Buying it seems a bad plan to me - no waste supply or heating and you can’t afford it, especially if you have DC.

But being a SAHM is just as big a financial decision as buying a house, for you personally. If you do that, consider the medium and long term (eg pension) and plan B should your relationship end (half do), or one of you becomes unable to work.

It sounds like a fantasy house, fine with plenty of funds in your own right and no need to earn anything.

I heard something the other day about septic tanks no longer being emptied. I wasn't really listening properly because we haven't got one, but please check it out. If true, a house with a septic tank would be unsaleable.

@longearedbat @honeyroar we live in a 1700's stone farm house that is very exposed, high up in the Pennines.
The heating is on a thermostat all year, if it drops cold, it comes on. It can be on in summer if it is chilly at night. I am out in all weather and like it to be warm when I get in. That said, I always have a light fleece on indoors, all year round. I don't expect the house to be baking just for me.
The tank is 2500 litre, the whole system is only 3 years old and the tank is behind a locked door, so no way is it being stolen.

I think you're doing the right thing seeing it OP! You might go and not love it and then at least you won't always be wondering what if.

I think having more financial security and being a SAHP, if that's what you want, is much more valuable than a slightly nicer house. And to be honest I don't think the house sounds that nice....

Living in a house without central heating would be grim and expensive. Going for a viewing in late May won't really give you a sense of that.

I also think living somewhere very isolated will have less and less appeal as the kids get older and you have to play taxi driver every waking minute.

It's clearly a dream house so if you can afford it, go for it.

You can do things up as you live in it. My DH and I did the same in our late 20's and, 30 years on, our house is truly amazing and I pinch myself every day that I am lucky enough to live here. I've lived in a house with a septic tank and they are NO problem. I also had storage heaters when I moved in and the DH removed them when we could afford gas central heating. If your house is remote Calor would be fine too.

My only caveat would be a Corbyn governemt. Asd he's a Marxist he believes in state ownership of private property. Obviously there would be uproar if he tried to do this overtly but the current plan is to triple the council tax and, when people can't afford to pay it, siphon the money due from the equity so when you die or sell up the state owns your house. If your dream house is a big, detached one, the council tax would be large.

How secure are your jobs? Have two friends who've recently moved and mortgaged to the hilt and now out of work since Xmas (very experienced people) with nothing imminent on the horizon (and this is the South East).

Brexit is a chill wind.....so now is a bad time to take risks for you with baby on the way.

I bought a rural cottage with no central heating, damp, single framed aluminium windows etc etc

We now have oil heating, two log burners, external installation etc. It’s pretty amazing BUT did cost a lot of money to renovate so bear that in mind, but I’d go for it

Oh,and a sceptic tank, and the rules are changing around those, I’d ask them to replace

I would definately not buy the house and look for something more in budget and economical in terms of heating etc and more useful for your needs. Add a baby into the mix and your causing yourself unnecessary stress.

We put our house up for sale earlier this yr, after 4 offers & piss takers through the door we decided to stay where we are, we’ve added so much to the house log burner, central heating, new kitchen, shower room, most of the rooms plastered, plus close to shops, schools & family we sat down one day & realised we didn’t want another mortgage well into our 60’s, we are staying & having a conservatory put on the back instead with a short term loan & hopefully a drive too!