AIBU about ham, or is DH

[Blackswing12]

Our marriage is very troubled at the moment, new baby, sleep deprived, yada yada.

We've been having a lot of arguments lately, some the same old stuff, some new old stuff I can deal with, new stuff is hard, as it involves my family. In particular my dad, who is extremely annoying and needy, finding himself dumped by his partner and post surgery, so been spending more time with him lately, a few issues has cropped up with DH about this but have kind of dealt with it.

Now, back to the ham

Today, DH text me while he was at work and I was looking after DD1 and DD2 asking if I was going to Aldi over weekend,can I get him some ham trim,mayo, apples and "Best of both" bread.

I go to Aldi as I need to pick up a few bits for my dad who is unable to go shopping g at the moment,picked up a few bits for our upcoming holiday, then picked-up the bits DH wanted.

Just sat down after getting DDs to bed and this is the conversation:

DH "did u look at that ham when you bought it?" (I'm sensing a tone here too)

Me "yeh why, is it out of date?"

DH "it's not ham trimmings (it is) it's six thick pieces of ham, it's inedible,unusable why didn't you look at it when you bought it"

Me "are you for real? I had both squirming DDs in the trolley and your having a go for not looking at the ham?"

DH "I've now got to go out tomorrow and get ham and I didn't want to just because you couldn't be arsed to look at it"

We are now not talking!?
A bit stunned to be honest.

AIBu to not check a pack of ham trim before putting it in the trolley? Ham trim does come in all different shapes and sizes to be fair but come on?!

YABU but I'm struggling to get how different ham is "unuseable" surely ham is ham?!

What did he want it for?

Why does he have to get more ham?! What it is about thick ham that it cannot become thin ham?! He's a complete arsehole for being so utterly horrible when you had done him a favour. I'd be asking him why he feels entitled to speak to you like shit.

I would laugh if my partner got the arse over this. Big picture mate!

Aldi ham trimmings

Why does he think the slices are inedible?

Is it just me that'd bemused by this thread.

Surely the thick ham is nicer?! He’s being ridiculous. Ham is ham.

Even if the hams wasn't the shape he was expecting, surely there is a nicer way of explaining to the op that next time could she look for the ham, rather than moaning on and making a big deal about having to go tomorrow. If i were you, op, I'd make sure he was taking the kids with him tomorrow for his ham shopping. That way, you get a bit of a break for them all.

It was a shitty way for him to react. All partnerships have their ups and downs and it seems like you are going through a particularly difficult patch (this is clearly not just about ham).
To say patience and understanding is needed seems trite in this situation and it goes both ways. I found early marriage and parenthood the ost difficult stages of our relationship, it's such a huge transition, but there does come a time when one of you just has to bite the bullet and initiate and honest conversation.
I wish you both well x

Is it bits that don't come out as a full slice?

Pretty much. Too thin, too thick, not big enough, look like pigs arse etc

I’d be tempted to cut the thick ham up with the kitchen scissors and tell him you trimmed it for him.

I’d be tempted to cut the thick ham up with the kitchen scissors and tell him you trimmed it for him.

Can he not just cut the ham up into the shapes he would use, it will all taste the same surely? What if he gets there and finds it's all thick slices?
He needs to be shopping for his own ham since he is so unreasonable about your selection of ham.

Or better still....LTB!

Can you cut it in to little pieces for him? Why the fuck should she TheMsMurphy? Does her husband's penis render him incapable of using a knife?

Blackswing12 it would be the last time I ever went shopping for him. If what you've bought isn't good enough he can shop for himself.

Sorry but why the fuck should OP cut up ham for an adult?? If he’s picky about his ham being in bit he can bloody well cut it up himself!

The ONLY acceptable ham to get from Aldi is torchon ham .
YABU for not knowing this

Seriously though, Tell him to sort his own bloody ham about if he’s being all ungrateful over it.

Tell him that you have something to do, so he can take the kids with him to the shop. See how the fucker copes with actually having to look after his own kids while shopping.

From DH “give it to him on a plate and tell the miserable git to trim his own”. 🤣🤣🤣

There is another thread running tonight called "Ridiculous things that infuriate your toddler".

You could have just posted about your DH & the ham on that thread Blackswing as that is about his level, a toddler tantrum!

Ha. I'm just tucking into an Aldi ham trimming wrap.

You do have to sift through the packs. Same of it can be crap.

Yanbu though.

Never heard of ham trim?!

Tell him to get a grip .. X

GarthFunkel has it 😂

I would just take the scissors to it myself to show him then, if he chooses (to be a knob) and go out to get perfect ham, that’s on him.

There is another thread running tonight called "Ridiculous things that infuriate your toddler
Ha!ha! Off to read that. Pretty sure my DH & teen will have antics that feature on that.

He should definitely go and buy the right ham tomorrow- as long as he takes the baby / babies with him!

Why are slices of ham inedible? I don't get it.

"Go and buy your own ham then you ungrateful prick." - job done.

Seriously though, this obviously isn't about ham, you need to have a long talk or possibly look into couples therapy if you both still want to make it work.

Another one here who thinks it sounds like the awful petty arguments sleep deprived people have