To think I am 'careful' and not 'cheap'

[goawaywillya]

Okay a bit of back ground story. My dd1 attends a sn school and recently became good friends with a new girl in the school. This little girl is from a quite well off family and wants for nothing.
Today at a social event I got chatting to this child's mother who told me about how they had recently spent £120 on a new princess bed for dd and how they have a planned holiday to NZ next year to visit family. She also described going to the cinema or local play centres each weekend and how the eldest dd has violin lessons etc
Then she asked about my own circumstances and I described what I do on a frequent basis to save money she looked shocked and said ' oh. We should be cheap too'. I was a bit 🙄 and when she said ' if you can ever afford to eat out as a family you should try Nando's, they're cheap 'I was like

I'm not jealous of this family. They have good jobs and deserve to spend their own money as they see fit, but AIBU to see myself as 'careful ' rather than 'cheap'. Some of what I do is-

. Dress dd2 in ds old trousers as boys clothes are tougher anyway and her dresses are worn again as tops with leggings.
.once a week I raid the fridge/ freezer and dinner is a mix of this ( I hate waste)
. I sew and darn clothes and can replace a zip
. I have made sardine heads into a pizza topping before
.i have invited family to dinner and kept their left over bones to make stock
. Do not eat out because it's not affordable and I would be shocked by the prices anyway.
I make my own laundry liquid/powder
.i make cake out of banana skins and also out of whole oranges and lemons including pips
.instead of paying huge fees for holiday activities I take the kids to chase the pigeons and feed them sausage roll crumbs outside our local Greggs 😳 or just to play at the park
Our local children's centre does nice low cost/ free activities also.
.i have bought cheap products from Asda and placed it into an empty box of 'posh' product.
. I regift unwanted presents for birthdays or Xmas
.i make vinegar from 🍏 cores
.i once made a homemade suncream when I could not afford a bottle of the real stuff
. I love charity shops and bought dds birthday gift there for under £10. Plus we have taken the kids there to spend their pocket money on toys and books.
.if something is over £5 I will struggle to buy it on principle
.. I grate used bars of soap to make new full bars
. I love summer, i don't have to use the heating 😁
. I buy clothes for ages older than the dcs are so they grow into them and I feel I'm getting my money's worth.
. I got rid of my tv licence and now just use Netflix and YouTube.

See, it's nothing extreme, just trying to save money as we go along. I'm sorry this post is so long , it's just hard to stop once started.

.

Some of this is sensible- I grew up in the 70's and we didn't have playcentres, so it was play out, off to the park, play in the garden or go to the beach (we were lucky to live near the beach). Didn't eat out in a restaurant ever, not once. Sandwiches every time (remember the soggy cheese!)

I first went in a restaurant in my late teens at university.

Eating out wasn't a thing we did.

We did go on holiday though, camping, cycling and so on.

In the 2nd WW having a two inch bath where you got in and splashed the water was standard and if you had more, you were Letting Britain Down.

Now I love a more consumer oriented lifestyle myself now- eating out, playcentres, buying my stock cubes, lots of cheap clothes, but it's obvious from this thread that the climate change emergency won't be solved by individual people changing.

Basically everyone just wants what they want and what will have to change is at a legislative level e.g. electric cars with petrol banned. Or actual food shortages/power outages so people have to adapt more.

Anyway I am way ahead of you. I make pasta out of sardine heads with a spiraliser and whenever any of my family come round I bash their fucking heads in, slice them very thinly and use them to darn holes in the 80 year old socks I got as a treat from the Cancer Research Shop.

@Reasonstobeearful Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I can't cope with this.

Recipe for banana peel cake - one of many on the internet.

lovefoodhatewaste.co.nz/recipes/banana-peel-cake/

And what's funny about making vinegar from apples? Surely that's what cider vinegar is? You pay a fortune for a bottle of that in the supermarket and it's just apple vinegar.

I use bar soap. I don't grate it when it's down to it's last sliver (never enough to grate to be honest, it is literally so thin it's like a piece of paper). I just pop that sliver onto the wet new soap, they merge in after a couple of times of using the new bar. Job done.

Not sure about the sardine head pizza but each to their own.

I'm all for carefulness as long as the outcome is either a) keeping your head above water and balancing the books or b) using what you save to have a bloody good splurge like a fantastic holiday or going for a good night out once in a while. I think you have to have a balance in life - keeping a lid on spending whilst still having something to look forward to.

Oh, by the way, the grating soap brought back a memory. When my mum ran out of washing powder and the shops were shut (probably a Sunday when we didn't have shop opening then), dad grated bar soap into the twin tub.

Please don't chase the pigeons.

Thanking you.

Scaring animals so you don't have to pay for entertainment so awful.

Whatever must the children think of it though. It all sound so lifeless.

I know people like OP

When DS goes over to their house, he is only allowed to eat fruit if he (like them) eats the whole thing, so apple and pear with core and pips. Not allowed to flush loo after a wee. Cut up news paper instead of loo paper. They use cheap washing up liquid as shampoo (" unnecessary product refinement") they make "pizza" by putting some tomato paste and a tiny bit of cheese on bread, then microwave it

It is fascinating!

He's a professor, she works at a management consultancy. They live in a million pound house.

Yet this is how they live

Would love to take you all on a guided tour through their house

I shall suggest sardinehead pizza next time I see them

I’m laughing so much at this I’m crying, DH asked what could be so funny, I couldn’t read some of the answers for laughing. Chasing pigeons ffs....

This has got to be a wind up.

All the food stuff and the clothes I have no issue with. Homemade stock is definitely worth it.

But the sun cream is a bit worrying (is it safe?) and the chasing pigeons thing a bit mean. Just take them to the park ffs. Also free.

And I’m choking laughing at this poor woman making 1 innocuous comment and getting this deluge.

When i was young I used to thing Sudocrem was sunblock (and was what skiers, Australia lifeguards and explorers put on their noses) and I can't lie, I still wonder this today.

I suppose a pizza with sardine heads really isn't a million miles from Starry Gazey Pie, which is considered a delicay:

www.thebestofcornwall.info/food-and-drink/cornish-classic-recipes/feature/120

Except for the sardine heads I think most of us do this stuff.

It's a million miles away from Stargazey Pie!

(Also I want to know were the rest of the sardine went. Fed to relatives before their bones were boiled for stock?! )

I think this post demonstrates the need for proper sentence structure because it's had me howling.

Anyway I am way ahead of you. I make pasta out of sardine heads with a spiraliser and whenever any of my family come round I bash their fucking heads in, slice them very thinly and use them to darn holes in the 80 year old socks I got as a treat from the Cancer Research Shop

But this had tears and snot pouring down my face so much my husband gave me really strange looks

Except for the sardine heads I think most of us do this stuff

I have to say I don’t do any of the stuff in the OP (bar making our own stock, which we do because we prefer it, not for economy reasons).
Obviously most of us economise to a greater or lesser degree, but I do things like meal plan (so there’s no wasted food), use hand me down clothes from friends etc. I don’t have the time nor the inclination to do a lot of the things the OP has listed (and don’t know anyone who does to be honest, my most frugal friend wouldn’t take her kids chasing pigeons as an activity... in fact the reason she’s so frugal is so she can afford for her children to pursue their hobbies such as gymnastics and swimming).

To use up 6 banana skins in LondonJax's cake means buying flour, sugar, eggs and butter. You could make a Victoria sponge and leave out the banana skins.

Stone soup.

Started thinking she was being mean but then read that list and yes, I'd say you were cheap and clearly have lots of spare time

"Tunt

“ have invited family to dinner and kept their left over bones to make stock”

That’s not very hospitable, Jeffrey."
omg thats funny.
Sardine heads???

This thread is genius.
Anyway I am way ahead of you. I make pasta out of sardine heads with a spiraliser and whenever any of my family come round I bash their fucking heads in, slice them very thinly and use them to darn holes in the 80 year old socks I got as a treat from the Cancer Research Shop

If you really want to save money long term op then why not feed your kids to the pigeons?

Just think of all the lovely money you will save and will be doing a good deed to the birds at the same time.

Meanwhile, back in the real world I just had a fit of frivolity after reading this thread and put TWO washing capsules in the washing machine because I just loves the smell and am eating profiteroles for breakfast. No sardine heads here. Poor but well fed with clean washing

You pay a fortune for a bottle of that in the supermarket and it's just apple vinegar.

80p (this includes the bottle)

Baldrick's coffee springs to mind for some reason...