To think diets don’t work

[BitterSweetSyn]

I’ve just come out of a Slimming World meeting, the biggest I’ve been ever been in my life.

Pre DC I always maintained a normal weight but joined WW after and lost all the baby weight but became a bit obsessed. Gradually gained back the weight plus another 2st so joined the gym, did PTs and got an eating plan. Lost the weight quickly, looked amazing but became obsessed with cheat days and if I messed up and didn’t stick to exactly what the plan said, I binged. Something I had never done before. I’d find myself sitting in the car after shopping, devouring crisps, then because I ruined it I’d eat nearly a whole loaf of bread with real butter at home because I was “starting again tomorrow”
Eventually I realized this was too restrictive so joined Slimming World, threw myself into the group, the online support etc and lost 1.5 stone. Still being about 3stone overweight this didn’t happen quick enough and I hated my body and my relationship with food was destroyed, still binging when I went over my syns.
Ended up coming off and deciding to do the Cambridge Diet. Somehow gained back 2stone before this but then lost 3stone but my relationship with food and myself was at an all time low. The binging was off the scales and I even started using laxatives to have results on the scales if I had overindulged.
Realized this was messing me up more than anything. Quit. Tried to repair my relationship with food and be normal. Binged straight for over a year and today I’ve went back to slimming world weighing 16st and worse still, the same people are there. Either the same size or bigger than ever.

I was normal before I tried to diet. I ate when I was hungry, I enjoyed cooking, I loved baking, food was an enjoyable thing to me.

I cant be the only one? I wish I had just walked and swam more after DC instead of entering this toxic abusive relationship with food.

Op you have to find what works for you. All these suggestions wont work at all if you dont address the underlying cause of your weight gain.

I have done intuitive eating and MFP and 5:2 and they have made me fatter. I cant do that kind of regulation becuase of issues in my mind regarding how I look / how much I weigh / self loathing / constantly onto the new next magic pill.

I had to STOP and realise my issues were inside of me. I have only ever been "thin" or able to loose weight when my Mental health is bad. Therefore I have an unnatural connection with thin-ness and ill-ness within myself.

My sister as mentioned before who has a wealth of knowledge told me to do SW, because in her eyes its approach is the best and would work best for me. Taking away the nonsense that people concoct around it (ie 12 muller lights a day and food is syned = bad). She said if you strip it back it gets you to eat lean meat, tons of fruit and veggies, and limited amounts of bread and dairy. All of which is roughly positive. It tells you you CAN indulge but only to a certain point each day. It tells you you CAN eat pasta - but (if you do it properly) only if at least a 3/4 of your plate is made up of salad / brocolli / carrots etc. So you wouldnt be able to eat unlimited pasta if you applied this methodology.

Im not saying do SW, Im just saying that for me the weekly accountability has been essential. Ive lost count of the weeks Ive thought I look "fat" to discover Ive lost 3 lbs. All the way through this process from last October I have realised over and over again I have lost control of the way I perceive my body. I have lost the ability to connect with it. Which is why 5: and intutive eating just didnt work because I made fucked up choices over food over and over.

Through doing SW I have got in the habit of always eating breakfast / drinking lots of water / eating far more fruit and vege (and I thought I ate a lot before) and cuting down on junk and booze. You dont have to go head first into all the crazyness of it .

When my consultant asks me if Im pleased regarding my loss - I always say (Im sure a bit to her annoyance) "I try to not have an emotional reaction to my weight and its fluctuations". Of course Im pleased Im loosing weight but it doesnt make me good or bad or happy or sad. its just a moment in time.

So you need to work out what methodology will work for you. I have friends you swear by 5:2, and others who never count a calorie but weight train heavy. Good luck

I agree that sugar is addictive joystir - but giving t up, for most people, is far from effortless! Small steps, taken over a long period (so that they become normal) towards a healthier diet are much more realistic for most people.

1/3 of your plate is veggies not 3/4 Im not a rabbit !

But formulated diets like WW and SW are too restrictive to follow long-term, ivykaty44. Our bodies haven't evolved to be fed minimal calories for years at a time. Watch the Sandra Aadmodt TED talk and you'll see her scientifically explain (she's a neuroscientist) why diets don't just fail because people stop following them. Our bodies fight back against the food deprivation.

Slimming companies would go broke if they had a high success rate because no one would need them anymore.

Calorie counting, reading labels, weighing portion sizes, drinking water and exercise is the only way I’ve been able to lose weight and when I’ve ignored them/fell back into old habits I gained. My fitness pal (basic free account) is a good tool to help you understand how much you’re eating and drinking on a daily basis.

The Minnesota starvation experiment makes great reading for those who insist our bodies go into “starvation mode”.

There are ways to boost metabolism too and having more muscle is one of these ways.

Hi OP, I second the posters saying diets don't work!
I decided to give up dieting after being on and off SW and WW for years. I believe too that they make you disorder your eating and do not empower you to trust your own body when it comes to food choices.
I'm trying to accept my body the weight and size it is ( although I have no idea what weight I am as I have also thrown the scales out). Have a read about intuitive eating as they talk about letting go of diet mentality and relearning to trust yourself. I'm currently reading 'the f*ck it diet' which is very similar. Good luck xx

I haven't read all the replies yet, I will after I post this. OP, you have to read this book, have attached a pic. It explains exactly what you are feeling and it's a revelation. Diets may work in the short term, but people rarely see lasting effects because it leads to disorder eating. Deprivation causes people to over eat in the long run. The author of this talks so much sense.

I read this just last weekend and I can feel a change in myself already. I'm not conflicted anymore. I'm not depriving myself of anything. I'm asking myself what I want to eat, having it but stopping when I'm full.

The diets you've tried have messed with your head, your body knows when you're hungry and when you're full. You just have to trust it.

I haven't given sugar up nor will I. In my first post I said nothing is off the menu, I just limit it to one day a week or a special occasion.

Have you tried low carb if you binge on carbs? Worth a try

I’m actually getting emotional that there are people who understand.
I wondered was I just rebelling after that depressing meeting.

I’m watching the Ted Talk now! Will definitely look into the book listed above! And the thread linked is also exactly what i need!

Do you think it’s possible I can actually lose weight by throwing out (all) the rule books and going back to listening to my body?

SauvingnonBlanketyBlanc Low carbing is dieting though. OP is trying to avoid going on another diet.

Yanbu.
If diets work, why so many boomerang weight watchers and slimming world members?
If they work, why doesn't the NHS do more to promote them?
Why are there so many fat failed dieters?
Why are there all these diet foods which are full of a.s or fat to compensate for reduced sugar?
It's all a load of bollocks. Eat less move more. Boring, hard, depressing but free and effective. Requires a will of iron and patience though. Obviously not cool enough 🙄

Do you think it’s possible I can actually lose weight by throwing out (all) the rule books and going back to listening to my body?

YES! Absolutely. It will take time, but eventually your body will realise it's no longer constantly jumping between feast and famine mode and will find it's own natural level. When I finally stopped dieting (after years of building up to it) in Sept last year I was 14st 6lbs, the heaviest I've ever been - even heavier than when I was pregnant. I'm now 13st 11lbs and I'm doing absolutely nothing by way of dieting/restricting food.
It's obviously not something that happens overnight but it DOES happen.

Pop over to the HDE hunger directed eating thread on weight loss chat

@Bookworm shit yes sorry,I binge on carbs and its helped me so was just a suggestion

Hi OP, I'm not going to tell you I've found the right answer. I know the emotional side of eating is important, but I've come to the view that people are so interested in this that they forget that certain foods trigger a physiological reaction in us, including setting off cravings. This will be personal to you, and based on a multitude of things including genes and gut flora. Instead of a standardised books of rules about how to eat, I think there is something to be said to be an experimenter on yourself - if I try this, how does it make me feel? If I later than this time, does it affect my sleep? Try new ingredients and recipes and bring back playfulness to your relationship with food.

Diets don't work, creating a calorie deficit by healthy eating and exercising does but it requires willpower.

It sounds like you need to go back to basics and consider what you SHOULD eat rather than what you shouldn't.

Eat some lean protein and good fats (avocado, olive oil, nuts) with every meal. Eat at least five portions of vegetables a day, try to get plenty of fibre (rye breads, beans, fibrous veg). Sit down to eat your food and chew carefully. Eat enough at each meal that it keeps you going until your next one. Plan your meals so that if you are a bit peckish you can hang on knowing it's going to be lovely and you don't want to ruin it!

That said, I've been doing 5:2 as I got into bad habits. I also think that periods of fasting are good for the gut bacteria (and for reminding me that I won't die if I don't have a snack!). I did 5:2 about six years ago and mostly maintained using the above tips, until a tough period that had me diving into the cakes!

Diets aren't good for the body you end up ignoring our body's signs for food. Fantastic book out called just eat it. Recommend it :)

Diets don’t but a good way of eating can help massively

Body Positive Power: How to stop dieting, make peace with your body and live www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1785041320/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_f.R3CbPR68Z5G?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

I really reccomend this book - I listen to ot on audible and she's very charming. Evidence based reasons why diets don't work and positive reasons to love your body as it is.

Why we have decided that losing weight on a diet - then coming off the diet and eating in the exactly the same way which made us pile the weight on in the first means diets don't work baffles me.

It baffles me that you can't get your head around that.

I could kiss you all!

Based on lots of your recommendations ive ended up down a positive rabbit hole of intuitive eating online and there are so many women like me who started off with a small amount to lose and ended up obese through giving the natural cues your body gives you over to a diet rulebook.

I really can’t say there’s been an element of emotional eating, though I know that seems unlikely at my high weight but life is great and I just got stuck in a cycle of either on a diet or off one.

I felt hopeless and miserable when I started this thread, I half hoped someone would say go back on Cambridge because of the allure of rapid weight loss!

Read Thin by Josie Spinardi. She is an advocate of hunger directed eating