AIBU to be annoyed people assume this will be my last pregnancy?

[Denise3011]

I have a DS and I’m expecting a DD.
I know when people are pregnant with a second/third baby of the same gender they get: “oh, never mind, you can try again for a boy/girl”

I seem to be facing the opposite comments daily and it’s really starting to annoy me! (Probably because I’m 38 weeks pregnant & everything annoys me!)

“Oh how lovely, one of each. You won’t need to have any more then”
“Oh perfect, a boy and a girl, that’s you done then”

Am I done? Do I have to be ‘done’ just because I’m lucky enough to have one
of each?!
For the record, I don’t know if I am ‘done’!
But strangers seem to have decided for me!
Work colleagues even had a conversation about me “not needing anymore mat leave” and how “financially, why would I want a 3rd or more”
I know it’s harmless comments, but I’m fat and frustrated!

The same thing happened to me so I went on to have another boy and girl afterwards .

Honestly, people speak without thinking sometimes. I know it’s tough when hormonal but try your best not to let it get to you.

I get irritated when people assume I'll be having more than 1. Currently pg with DC1, I'm 41 and DH nearly 46. We didn't have fertility issues just met late.

But we strongly suspect this will be our one and only. Mainly due to age but also financial concerns. Of course we may change our minds but 1 seems perfect right now! But people see to think it is the rule to have 2?

I was congratulated on "How clever" I was after my daughter was born (already, had a son).
Had never been called it since... Or before come to think of it.
Oh well
As pp have said, people are twats

My daughter was stillborn in February. I’m pregnant again now (and very grateful). Someone said she hoped it was a girl so that I could have one of each - I already have a son. I had to point out that I already had a daughter too, thanks, and that the last thing I was concerned about was gender when we’d already had to plan one baby funeral.
People are twats don’t think before they speak

Impatienceismyvirtue x

What does it matter what people say? They mean no harm

It's just small talk most of the time - in the nicest possible way nobody really cares!

Honestly you're being too sensitive. People are really just trying to make conversation with you about something of interest to you. That's it.

I can guarantee that if you respond with "well actually we might want another 1 (10)". You won't get judgy wrinkled noses. The conversation will just flow onto "ooh, how many would you like? Hehe you'll have your hands full" same old shit.

The people you're talking too just want an easy chat. Stop being such a PITA.

Jesus - its just small talk. If this is an issue - you need to find real issues - people are just making conversation. No one apart from your family and very close friends care OP.

I had a boy and girl and I got the "oh your all done now" I've gone on to have 3 more girls since then. And with the last two I got the "oh are you trying for a boy" 🙄 it's so boring.

no matter what your family size there will always be a comment. I don't want children = you will change your mind We are having one child = your selfish they should get a sibling. We have 2 boys = did you want one of each/will you try for a girl We have 2 girls = did you want one of each/will you try for a boy We have 3 boys = oh youre trying for a girl We have 3 girls = oh youre trying for a boy We have 4 plus = do you not have a tv? are you going to stop now? do you want a football team? We've adopted/fostered = do you want your own/could you not conceive? People should just mind their own business especially if you haven't asked for their opinion.

Yup I have four boys and I still get oh didn’t you want a girl
Youngest is 8 so certainly no more for me
Hard if you’re a bit pregnant and sensitive but I just ignore it and am happy with my 4 boys

Some of you are way too sensitive, nobody actually cares they’re just making small talk.

I met a woman lately in a work setting who was telling me about her DS who happened to be the same age as my DD. I said “oh I’ve only the one as well, she’s also X age!”
Well! The woman leaned into me menacingly and said “now hang on a minute there, I didn’t choose to only have one. I’m not like that. Just so we’re clear” 😳
Scary weird person

'We're thinking five, maybe 6 if we can get the bedrooms to work'

is the obvious answer :)

I have never understood why people have a gender preference, less so why they think others have a gender preference topped off with an assumption that their specific preference is matched by all!

People just make small talk, I suspect not of them give a tiny rats arse how many kids you have and what sex. It is just stuff you say to pregnant women, you are taking it too personally. If they said nothing you would doubtless be bleating they were ignoring your pregnancy.

Anyway, stop at 2. We have too many children in the west consuming too many resources.

YADNBU. It's bloody annoying.

Actually, I'm getting the opposite. People assuming I'm having another at some point. Close family included. I have one DS, due another baby any day (don't know if it's a boy or girl) but I am DONE with this one. I am 100% not having any more. Yet people don't seem to believe me and keep telling me I'll change my mind etc.

Wednesday you missed out 'we have three or more children', response 'Wow, you must be busy'.

Work have annoyed me tho - it’s actually presumed I am done, I think if I was to have another, my bosses would be quite annoyed!

Play with that. Start making noises about having a third in maybe a couple of years' time. Leave them hanging on!