AIBU for wondering why the government assumes 12 year olds don’t need childcare?

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Hi folks,
Looking at Tax Free Childcare and I see it stops when a child turns 12.
www.gov.uk/tax-free-childcare
Can I ask what the heck working parents with 12 year olds are expected to do in the summer and why there is so little provision for that tricky bit where they’re pretty independent but you really don’t want them sitting around the house all day on their own?
DS is 12 and it looks like summer care will cost me £125 a week. Normally I’d apply accrued childcare vouchers, but the summer camps are not registered for childcare vouchers. The ones that are registered won’t take him because he’s 12.

DS is 12 and it looks like summer care will cost me £125 a week. Normally I’d apply accrued childcare vouchers, but the summer camps are not registered for childcare vouchers. The ones that are registered won’t take him because he’s 12.

This is what she posted so I don't know.

Ah thanks, been a while since I lived there but I remember 5 day clubs in the summer

Yes, definitely! There are so many you couldn't go to them all even if you were inclined. And they send child catcher buses round, rounding up children for church.

Isn't that the point of this thread she don't want to leave him and she doesn't want to pay £125.

Has your DS expressed an opinion on what he’d like to do?

My mum used to send me to day camps over the holidays. She stopped after I came home when the staff started putting mats out for ‘nap time’ I was perfectly happy spending the days at home or out not doing much with my friends.

And I was in the same position and had to pay 2 x summer camp
I saved up for it as I couldn’t claim them on tax credits as not OFSTED

having less money (borrowing it if I had to) was shit but I had peace of mind my kids were ok. You can’t buy that

^i meant you can’t put a price on it!

AIBU to wonder why many people think it is the governments job to provide for parents' life choices, and other people's job to pay for it.

I'm a SAHM so I don't need to worry

Ah so you don't actually have to solve this issue yourself, just judge other people in this situation and call people snowflakes because abuse and neglect was cool in the 70's. Your partners childhood sounds shit by the way.

Mine went to the odd day here and there at special interest clubs (sports/performing arts/cookery school etc) at this age. Usually shorter days and most didn't take childcare vouchers (we were on the older scheme), some they could walk to, others needed lifts, it was tricky but just about do-able with flexible working. We also had grandparents visit for a couple of days occasionally.

and call people snowflakes because abuse and neglect was cool in the 70's.

When she wasn't even there, either!

wengie It is incredible that having bleated the virtues of leaving children for ten hours a day for months on end throughout this thread, it turns out that YOUR children are being lovingly cared for at home by you, and unlikely to come to any harm.

So its okay for other people's children to be put at risk, but not your own.

bamboo if she had been, she may not have thought it was so cool.
Its only cool when all the shit happens to someone else.

I think I did state that there are no nearby relatives.

It was shit it was his close friend that helped him through it. The problem was is that no one had a choice back then ss was shit and schools was just as abusive. There is more going on today for young people than there was back then and yet people still find time to moan.

I will be working when my youngest starts school in September. No close family to help me out. I would have to prepare like everyone else and pay for summer camps and child care. You don't hear many people in real life complaining because they have there shit sorted out.

Sorry op I found it on the first page.

Perhaps the government should allow people to opt into having tax free childcare to the age of 16

If its something that the op has to do then I'm not going to make her feel bad about that. If its something she has to do because lets face it £750 to get in a short amount of time might not be achievable for her. If I was her I would call him throughout the day to ease my mind. These things happen.

I think the answer is to save up across the year for residential activities. As a kid I remember doing guide camp, pgl, DofE, dance camp, sports clubs, I was sent down to my grandma in Cornwall (I took a friend). I also helped out with the local church's kids activities. But I also remember most mums being at home, so I do appreciate it's very different now. I hope you are able to put in place some of the suggestions on here OP.

I suspect it's very few parents that genuinely leave their DC day in day out for weeks for many hours a day.
As has been suggested already, they take odd days of annual leave (even half days) to split up the time, they possibly work from home or flexibly (e.g. I work some short days and long days and DH does opposite which means one of us is always home by 3.30/4pm). Or they work close enough to pop home at lunch time. Or they have some sort of reciprocal arrangement with friends' parents.

On the flip side of the coin, I had a mother who was a SAHM. That meant I had to spend the majority of my summer holidays doing what my much younger siblings wanted to do (going to a play park gets dull very quickly when you're a teen). I was allowed a couple of planned excursions out but holidays were seen as "family time" so these were strictly limited (and subject to strict rules). I spent a lot of time sat in my room, on my own. I suspect this is at least partly behind my reasoning that actually teens don't want constant adult supervision and their lives planned out.

redsky On the plus side nothing awful happened to you, because despite the boredom of your mother's planned days out, she did take care of you. You may not feel particularly grateful, but maybe she saw dangers at the time, and made that decision.

Surely the balance is to allow older children some independence, and adventure but with a few safety nets when they need it. I am all for dc making mistakes and learning from them, but no ones that will permanently damage or disfigure them.

YANBU

That's rubbish that can't used your accrued Childcare vouchers!

On the flip side, I used to teach in a PRU in a very deprived area. Most of the kids hated the holidays. Yes they didn't much like school but preferred school time as they had a place to belong, of stability, reliable food etc. When they came back in September there was always a few weeks where they were feral and had to get back into the routine. So yes, there are many secondary age kids who are literally left to fend for themselves for the entire holiday.

AIBU generally is full of people who are either bored or procrastinating posting about other people's business, so if someone doesnt like that I dunno what to say! But you can do that without inventing shit though.

This is why I think the summer holidays can be crap for some teens, you're either left to your own devices or taken on day trips you're too old for. I remember being relieved when the summer holidays were over as they were so boring and I hated school

This is why I didn't think about working, there's no way we wanted latch key kids, they still need a lot of guidance at this age.
There are no alternatives because at 12 they are supposed to be able to manage, or you pay for childcare if they can't.
The choices are leave them be, cough up for childcare, use all your leave, or not work.