Wedding reception- takeaway at home?

[DorisandDeidre]

Would we BU to do this? Considering having the church ceremony and then going back to ours for a takeaway. Would you be okay with this as a guest? We have a small guest list (less than 15) and most have complex dietary requirements so we were thinking takeaway gives them the option of where we get the food from.

Will you have a first dance or something? Anything?

Or your new DH carries you over the threshold carrying bags of takeaway....
Alternative at least!
Go for it! Just don't call it a wedding - just say, I'd love if you could come back to ours after for a takeaway. We're not having a wedding. Just want our best friends with us to celebrate.

The presence of cows might have made it seem more ceremonial somehow....

Will there be any music?. No. Everyone is required to sit in silence.

Anything other than the meal provided? tepid water

How are 15 people going to differentiate their Bhunas from their Jalfrezis? everything will be mixed into one bucket from which everyone will eat

And where are you ordering from for the other two? she's buying a lettuce

Will there be plates no, the normal habit of people decanting takeout onto plates is frowned upon at this me
seatsthey can bloody learn to levitate
cutlery only previously chewed wooden ones
anything? no.

My answers are as ridiculous as your insistence that a wedding ceremony followed y food with friends isn't a wedding.
Going back to the couples home for the reception isn't so unusual that it warrants your rudeness. They just have the good sense to not spend hours making it themselves. Rather like I didn't at my hotel reception.

It's the organising and waiting on everyone that I just wouldn't want to do on my wedding day. Sorry if this has been covered (haven't RTFT in its entirety) but couldn't you book the Indian restaurant and go there? And ask if for the occasion (paying extra if needed) they could do some plain dishes that the non Indian eating people could have?

Ah - the ceremonial cow dance. I remember it well....

We're not having a wedding

Oh, did he all it off? So we dint need to go to the registry office/ Church etc?

Well of course you do, we want you there

But you said you weren't having a wedding

Apparently it isn't a wedding if the celebrations after we have the wedding ceremony don't conform to the standards of Internet randomer. Doing something with the people we love, that we'd enjoy, within budget, is apparently shit so I can't say we have a wedding. It's the rules. Apparently.

This may vary depending on where you are in the country but I'd really encourage you to get some caterers' quotes. We paid £10.95 a head recently for a really good fork buffet which included proper platters, plates (both porcelain rather than paper or plastic), cutlery and napkins. We couldn't have done it much (if any) cheaper ourselves from the takeaway.

Perfect idea!

I'm Irish, so we don't do non-weddings. We live in sin instead .
If I was invited to a wedding and discovered on arrival, with me artfully placed hat and flowered frock, I'd be a little perturbed to be sat with a curry on me knee at the brides house! I think I'd choke on me vindaloo tbh.

My cousin got married last year. It covered two counties and three nights. I didn't go because I hate weddings, also because it would have cost me about 500 to attend.
The English non-wedding wedding is a new thing to me.

Even Jesus went to the wedding at Canaa! He turned water into wine - might be handy to invite him in case you run out OP....

Why are you even asking who gives a fuck what the guests think it’s your wedding. If they don’t like it they don’t have to come do they? Go for it!

How refreshing!

I sort of see what people are saying about it not being a wedding. Your ceremony is absolutely a wedding.

What you describe after seems like a perfectly standard “like round to OPs to a curry after an evening in the pub” type situation, not part of a wedding, if that makes sense?

I can’t quite understand whether it’s supposed to be so casual that’s exactly what you want, or whether you’re trying to dress this as an alternative “wedding breakfast” were it would be part of the whole day?

It sounds to me like the kind of plan that would be far more complicated and stressful in practice than it appears. I think there would be much easier ways of achieving a low cost, laid back, informal party. You risk guests being a pain in the arse with late orders, changed orders etc. You really don’t want to be running around collecting takeaway and dishing it up on your wedding day, and ime the bigger the order the more likely it is to go wrong. You could get the same effect by ordering a load of party food from one of the supermarkets and paying a couple of people to heat it and dish it out. You could get Indian food or whatever you wanted.
And however laid back you want it, and however much you’re focused on the marriage and not the wedding, it’s still a once in a lifetime occasion. Don’t just chuck it away. Of course you don’t have to spend tens of thousands, but you don’t have to make a point of making it as ordinary and workaday as you can possibly manage either.

Also as an earlier poster said usually take away curry costs the same as eating in (or is very slightly pricier) and 15 isn’t even a big table- why not just book a table at the restaurant?

Sounds amazing. It is a wedding, your wedding. Forget everyone else's comments. Only on mumsnet are you expected to provide canapés, lawn games, a babysitter, a free bar and a 4 course Michelin starred meal! Did the lot of them, I'd love to be a guest at your wedding!

I think it sounds lovely!

If it were my wedding, I wouldn't want people in my house under any circumstances. So, I would have the reception at church hall as, otherwise, I wouldn't cope!

I would also only order from one restaurant so that I could be certain it all turns up at the same time.

I would also have a wedding cake (probably a cheese cake) to cut after the food.

Some folk are spectacularly missing the point here and making misplaced suggestions
Hire a caterer
Get a chef
Get a marquee
Book the takeway restaurant chef
Book waiting staff
Use lovely plates (as opposed to unlovely plates?)

And the catastrophic warnings that
She’ll be queuing in a takeaway for hours
It’ll be a faff
Who wants to spend their wedding meal queuing in takeaway

it’s not wedding-y enough

The op hasn’t clearly explained she can’t/won’t be instructing
Chefs
Caterers
Waiting staff

Sounds fab, i'd RSVP to your wedding OP! And I want the chippy tea.

Who’s suggested a marquee?

OP said that caterers were out of budget. Several posters have observed that she may be surprised to find that caterers are a similar price to a takeaway.

I can't believe people saying it's not a wedding. The ceremony is the wedding anything afterwards is just a celebration.
How shallow... no wonder some people just worry about the party and showing off and lose track of what is really important.

Haha I inadvertently omitted the will there be a first dance question
Yea. The Macarena sure to help the jalfrezi settle

I think this sounds fab - 15 of your very favourite people, good food, drink, absolutely lovely!

to the person who said we need to make it special - it will be special as we'll be marrying each other surrounded by those we love and care about

I cannot think of anything more genuine, sincere or perfect.

Wishing you a happy marriage

Who's pissed on Auld's chips?!