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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To leave a 2 year old for 10 mins

726 replies

BlueSuedeStiletto · 27/04/2019 03:30

2 year old asleep in a cot they can't get out of. Needed to pop to the shops. 10 minutes away if that, child asleep the whole time, doors locked etc. Friend is horrified. WIBU?

OP posts:
adayatthebeach · 28/04/2019 19:01

To this day I remember waking up alone in my house while my mom went down the street to pick up the maid . I remember crying and being scared. Sad

moon2 · 28/04/2019 19:06

My parents used to think the same, they would go to a party 15 mins drive away and think I’d be safer at home sleeping in my cot and this was at 6-12 months old in expat zone in a country in Africa in the height of the 70s. They’d come and check on me every 30 mins or so they said but when I worked it out with 15 mins to drive there and 15 mins to drive back it can only have been every hour otherwise they would have had 1 minute at the party and had to drive back. Anyway boy did they get the fright if their life one night when they popped home to find every stone turned in the drive garden. They were petrified someone had broken in and worst of all might have taken me. They were relieved to find me still fast asleep and came to know that it was just the locals looking for a seasonal delicacy under the stones, but just shows how the apparent illusion of security and safety of a sleeping child is just that. An illusion. Too many cases of something happening on one fateful day just to take the chance. They still did it when I was older under 10 in the uk but hotly deny it now, but I do remember those nights lying awake scared that they’d never come home and what might have happened to them.

neveradullmoment99 · 28/04/2019 19:08

Seriously OP? Shock

Kayagh · 28/04/2019 19:09

Omg I can’t believe this is even a topic and been asked. Sorry neglect no doubt at all 2 mins or 10 min unless they can contact emergency services themselves for fire or anything big no and that goes for choosing the age to leave older kids as well. Just suck it up go without or take the baby with you I have twins and as much as it would be so much quicker to nip out alone not a chance I’ll spend the 20 mins getting them into the car first. Total ridiculous question maybe inform your health visitor ask their opinion for the child’s sake. Never leave a toddler home alone EVER

freefan · 28/04/2019 19:13

Oh my goodness, absolutely no way is it reasonable.
10 minutes in the life of a child is enough time for you not to have one anymore, it could come to all manner of harm and surely not anything in any shop is worth the risk of losing your child over.
Would love to know what item from the shop was worth doing something so dangerous and neglectful?

Beautga · 28/04/2019 19:13

When i used to take my child to nursery i was horrified when one of the mothers was talking to said she had to get back as she had left her baby in the cot we had been talking for twenty minutes.My baby was in the pram this was the first time i knew she hada baby.I informed her next time when we fetch our children she must have the baby with her or i would report her.The next day she appeared with the baby didnt talk to me didnt matter the baby was sage

Beautga · 28/04/2019 19:13

Mean safe

Touchmybum · 28/04/2019 19:14

Of course it's unreasonable, are you mad?!!!

Incredulous actually that anyone would think it reasonable....

MrsBadcrumble123 · 28/04/2019 19:23

Yes terrible idea - you’d never forgive yourself if something happened for the sake of a few groceries...

CrazyAllAroundMe · 28/04/2019 19:24

I wouldnt. Too many risk factors. I have a paedophile living next door.. I didnt know till last year and we've lived here a long time since my children were of the age he apparently desires Angry what if he'd seen me leave my home without my baby/toddler and got in! (I never left them I get angry/feel sick enough at him being able to see them running about all those years ago in and out of paddling pools) you never know who you live by and talk to and who may be waiting for a chance unfortunately...

Plus my friends 2yr old pulled a wardrobe down on top of the cot trying to climb out.

Luckily your child is safe and they could be 100 more 10 minute trips out but please don't risk them again, on trip 101 or 2 even just a plug in air freshener could start a fire then nothing will ever be more important than them but it be too late

sunshinemode · 28/04/2019 19:26

Lock heart actually social services would get involved.

Serialweightwatcher · 28/04/2019 19:29

If people can't rtft, why can't they at least read OP's comments - she hasn't got kids - she hasn't/wasn't going to do this - someone else did this and her friend was horrified and she herself thought it wasn't a problem

Crazybunnylady123 · 28/04/2019 19:30

I would not leave my 2 year old alone for 1 min. How awful.
I think how vulnerable they are and unaware of danger!

ToastyFingers · 28/04/2019 19:36

10 mins, absolutely not!
I have left the kids asleep to pop to the shop downstairs, but I was 2 minutes MAX and closer to them than when I put the bins out.

MollyMinniesMum · 28/04/2019 19:39

OMG, Fire could ravage your house in 2 minutes, a child snatcher could pop in, what if you were delayed? Would you ever be able to forgive yourself? If the authorities found out you’d be in deep trouble this would be classed as neglect.

lahdeedah2019 · 28/04/2019 19:40

I'm pretty sure the OP wrote this to get attention and a rise out of everyone . Know one can be that stupid surely as to leave a small child on their own

TriciaH87 · 28/04/2019 19:40

Shops ten minutes away so twenty travel time then selecting your items. Queuing time as shop could be busy your talking 30-45 minutes. Are you insane? It takes 2 minutes for someone to break in and snatch your child or for an electrical appliance to cause a fire. Have you heard of Madeleine mccann. Now I'm fairly certain they know more than they ever let on but let's just say what they say happened is true. Who's to say that in the short time you leave your tiny defenseless child nothing will happen. Plus I'm fairly certain its illegal as to leave a child the law states they must be mature enough to be left alone. A toddler is not mature enough and if your child cannot get out their cot they cannot all 999.

goddey25 · 28/04/2019 19:40

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MrsBadcrumble123 · 28/04/2019 19:49

PrimeraVez

Absolutely not. And I consider myself to be a pretty relaxed parenT

How relaxed would be if you came back to your house on fire?! My friends fusebox blew up and engulfed her kitchen in under 10 minutes - smoke alarm alerted them and they got out.... you’d be a massively irresponsible A hole to leave a 2 year old alone in a house imo

EllenMP · 28/04/2019 19:51

I don’t think this is nearly as bad as everyone else seems to think it is. You are the mother. If your instincts tell you the baby is safe that would be good enough for me? The odds of something happening while you are out that you could have prevented if you were home are tiny. No greater than the odds of an accident befalling both of you when you are out together, and I assume you take her out. Having said that, I would avoid doing it because I think it’s illegal and there are a lot of very judgy people out there. But if you have already done it, then don’t feel bad about it.

Lolipop10 · 28/04/2019 19:54

I cannot believe that someone is even asking this! Absolutely unbelievable and child neglect. I hope this gets reported to social services. This is what happened when the McCann’s left Madeline for 20 minutes and thought it’s fine because she was asleep and look what happened there.

luckylorca · 28/04/2019 19:55

@bubblegumunicorn - thanks so much! Xxx. We are ok but I’m still in shock. Sauvignon Blanc is helping though! 😁

psuedocream3 · 28/04/2019 19:58

Obviously it makes more sense to take baby with you even if it's more hassle, you could get hit by a car, mugged etc etc. Very unlikely but it probably happens to someone somewhere. If it's avoidable and I'm sure it is, don't do it.

That said, the horrified people, probably are the people that leave kids in the car whilst they go into the petrol station to pay for petrol, or have a shower when the kids nap, or let their kids play outside without an adult supervising.

SW6mama · 28/04/2019 20:01

No YANBU, you are being a complete and utter moron.

KimonoDragon · 28/04/2019 20:05

As a foster parent I can tell you that you would have your child removed should social services discover this.