So to cut a long story short as the subject says im being kept a secret. Iv been with him for just over a year and im becomming suspicious recently, until the last month or so he didnt really get on with ex, he goes around there everyday after work to see his kids and on his days off he spends all day there with them. Me and him see each other but not much because hes always there or in work. Now i think its great he plays such an active role in his kids lives still BUT maybe im immature or insecure but when hes there im not allowed to text or call him and yesterday he was there from 11am - 10 pm and when he rang me when he got him he was drunk (he denied this but he could hardly talk) iv never brought anything up to him so he has no reason to lie and we dont talk about his ex . Its starting to feel like he has two lives.recently he talked about meeting my children and he wants to make it clear to my ex that im with him he also talks about me telling my family. Am i being unreasonable by expecting him to tell his ex hes with someone? I went on a facebook stalk last night and found out I am 25 years younger than this women and the is pictures of them together within the last year like bbqs and christmas etc and they are all sitting around having family meals etc. I dont even no what advice im looking for suppose im just looking for someone to tell me im being stupid and its normal but i feel like this is a red flag. How would it even work he meets my kids but i never meet his, we cant go out places together with, ,my kids because his cant come and they are the same age. Im going to cebeebies land in novemeber for two days and suggested if he gets along with the kids he can come but he said he cant because he would feel bad his own kids wasnt there. my sons birthday is july and im having a party at mine (hes 5) i suggested he comes because the will be lots of parents kids there so he can just blend but nope because hed feel bad over his kids not being at the party. Should i just cut my losses here? or is it possible to have a balance between previous kids and a new partner? Im only 29 and could possibly want more kids in the future but i feel like it would have to be a secret child so his ex didnt stop him seeing his kids. Im in two minds whether to message her on facebook.(I wont because of his kids but i hate myself for even the thought of it)