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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU or is this friend being ultra-picky?

559 replies

scarbados · 24/04/2019 13:14

We moved to a small coastal town from a big city 3 years ago and were happy with the idea that we'd probably have friends visiting, especially during summer. We have a spare room with ensuite bathroom and it's always ready for visitors.

If people are staying, they're welcome to join us in whatever we do, go their own way or a mixture. Sometimes they eat with us, other times they eat out and at others we all eat out together. We never expect them to pay for our meals but it's nice when they do. Neither do we ever expect payment from our guests.

But ... the couple due to arrive tomorrow for 3 nights have just messaged me and asked me to make sure there's white bread and strawberry jam here for their breakfasts, and a carton of orange juice because she doesn't drink tea or coffee. (There's a supermarket at the end of the road which will be open when they get here so they could pick up their own stuff when they arrive.) Then I got a second message from the male of the pairing asking me to 'please make sure there's a clean throw over the sofa and the cat doesn't sit on it before they arrive' as after the last visit he noticed cat hair on his jeans. I use a pet hair brush daily on the sofa as I know the cat loves to sleep on it. He doesn't sit on any of the other chairs in the house, where the guest could easliy sit but he prefers the sofa.

I feel like suggesting he does his own shopping and brings a clothes brush, or books into one of the many hotels in town. He's getting 3 nights free accommodation and fed for at least 4 meals while he's here and seems to be trying to set out a list of requirements I have to meet.

AIBU to be seriously pissed off and tempted to tell them I'll book a hotel room on their behalf and they're paying for it?

OP posts:
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TatianaLarina · 25/04/2019 18:05

I do love MN for tales of unprecedented cheekyfuckery slash gaucheries.

Here’s to cat hair. Wine

DeniseRoyal · 25/04/2019 18:05

Cancel! And tell them why. Something like "sorry CF's, but I am going to have to cancel your visit, due to your frankly unreasonable demands and behaviour. Goodbye " They are not close friends so fuck them!

squirrelnutkins1 · 25/04/2019 18:06

🍿

MrsBadcrumble123 · 25/04/2019 18:06

They are both massive dickheads! I would feign huge sudden vomiting/explosive diarrhoea bug and tell them soz but I’m too ill to host find a hotel you scrounging pair of arseholes!! Love Reggie and I would happily let him sit with me on a sofa!! Grin

AJPTaylor · 25/04/2019 18:07

Cheeky fecker.

nuxe1984 · 25/04/2019 18:08

Hmmm... how about ignoring the messages? Don't get in his food demands, don't bother about the throw ( he can always sit on a cat hair free chair).
If he says do you have white bread in the morning just say no sorry we don't eat it but if you're desperate there's a supermarket at the end of the road.
If they're that fussy they should bring their own "special" food!

ToftyAC · 25/04/2019 18:15

The cheeky fuckery is strong with this pair - as is their rudeness, poor manners and sense of entitlement. However, I’d probably be the same as you OP and host them this last time and then no more.
Reggie is brilliant. I hope he sheds all over the cheeky bastards.

Smilingthru · 25/04/2019 18:17

😂

FauxFox · 25/04/2019 18:21

Definitely prepare the phrase “gosh, did you mean to be so rude?”

I think you are going to need it!

MrsJDornan · 25/04/2019 18:21

I wonder if they go and get their own orange juice Grin

LabradorMama · 25/04/2019 18:22

Not placemarking for further CF updates. Not at all.

cheapskatemum · 25/04/2019 18:23

YADNBU! They are CFs!

WhereYouLeftIt · 25/04/2019 18:24

"asked me to make sure there's white bread and strawberry jam here for their breakfasts, and a carton of orange juice because she doesn't drink tea or coffee ...asking me to 'please make sure there's a clean throw over the sofa and the cat doesn't sit on it before they arrive ... "
Did they really use the phrase 'make sure'? Because that changes it from a request to an order instruction, which is seriously CF!

Glad to see you won't be having them visit again.

I'd be taking great pleasure in pointing out to them both just how their behaviour is at such a contrast to your many other lovely visitors, and how it has highlighted to you just how freeloading and rude they both are.

Justaregularmum · 25/04/2019 18:25

Have they turned up yet?? Definitely not placemarking.. Hmm

wokeas · 25/04/2019 18:29

Scarbardos they are being unreasonable, not you. I wouldn't host 'friends' who demand certain terms and conditions.

Springwalk · 25/04/2019 18:33

Oh my! That takes the bloody Biscuit

I would absolutely message back and say their stay no longer works for you and a link to the hotels in the area. I wouldn't bother to be especially polite either.

I DO know one or two people like this, I can well believe it unfortunately. My best advice is get shot, and quickly, they will be a nightmare and are not worth the trouble.

MollyMinniesMum · 25/04/2019 18:33

Tell him to eff off!

how good friends are they? Sounds more lie they’re checking into a hotel and guess what? your cat lives there, they don’t! How rude

pictish · 25/04/2019 18:35

Honestly...I don’t see the need for the passive aggression.
To the first ‘requests’ I would have simply replied.

“Hi. The supermarket at the end of the road will be open so you will be able to find the items you want in there.
I’m afraid I can’t do anything about where the cat lies. You could always pop your towel down on the sofa before sitting if you’re worried about hair on your jeans.
Look forward to seeing you. Xx”

Polite...but says fuck off with your demands.

Then never ever have them through your door again, cheeky bastards.

ohfourfoxache · 25/04/2019 18:38

What a twattish pair Shock

Mia184 · 25/04/2019 18:39

OP Mia the cat is packing her stuff and coming over to visit Reggie. She would like to stay on the sofa in your guest room Smile

AIBU or is this friend being ultra-picky?
PhalangeReginaPhalange · 25/04/2019 18:43

Genuinely sniggering at the passive aggressive touches Grin

DrinkFeckArseGirls · 25/04/2019 18:43

Tell them there’s been a disaster and the car went on their bed. They better stay elsewhere.

Sissyjd · 25/04/2019 18:44

Ph my what total CF of the utmost degree...ffs hoe your letting them still stay shows how nice and tolerant you are op...id let the handsome Reggie into their room at night hopefully he will start yowling in their faces at 4am..lol Please update after CF have left!! Grin

Happierlife · 25/04/2019 18:46

"Feed the bread they buy to the cat"(obviously not actually feed it to the cat unless the cat likes bread) and say the cat really fancied bread this morning...

KurriKurri · 25/04/2019 18:47

'Supermarket will be open for you to buy your breakfast items. You are welcome to bring your own throw, but since cat is giving up his bed room for you to use, he's asked if you could put the throw over yourself as he's not keen on your smell.
Ciao (Miaow) xx '

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