Baby on plane

[Jobea91]

My parents recently paid for a surprise holiday to France for September. My DS will be 18months. My parent originally said a holiday somewhere in England so they could confirm dates but the surprise is it’s an all inclusive in Spain for me DH DS and all my siblings. I’m really excited.
DH today said he’s read things about air pressure changes being painful to babies and that it worried him so much he doesn’t want DS to go, he said he’d stay home with him for a week (which would be hell for him doing 24/7 with her alone) so I can still go, but my family and me are all really excited for DS to go, first time swimming, going to the beach, flying, different country etc.
My parents have already paid and we got him a passport especially.
DH said from what he’s read he thinks it’d be abusive to take him until hes 5 and can understand what’s happening air pressure wise etc.
Me and my sisters flew loads as babies and toddlers and I’ve always loved flying. DH is okay with it but doesn’t have same excitement as me.

I said I can’t/won’t take her if he doesn’t want me to but I disagree it’s so painful we should cancel and make my parents pay all cancellation fees etc.
I said I’ll look at other ways to get there.

AIBU for feeling annoyed he’s decided this? He said we agreed to a England holiday not Spain (he hates surprises). It’s difficult if it’s something he genuinely thinks is abusive.

It sounds to me like your DH doesn't ant to go and is using your baby as his excuse.

Thousands of babies fly every year with no issues at all. He MUST know this.

He's found probably one unsubstantiated source for this 'fact' and using it against you.

If there were real genuine issues with babies flying it would be all over every guideline, and they simply wouldn't be allowed to on medical grounds. However, this is not the case. Babies can fly from being a few days old.

Tell him that you only agree if he can find a number of genuine medical sources which are peer reviewed that back up his findings that children under the age of 5 shouldn't fly. Then maybe you will consider you and baby not going.

My dd and ds have flown long haul regularly since we moved abroad when they were small. They have a drink on take off - the miracle 360 cup has been fab for this. If your ds is still breast or bottle feeding then try and time a feed for take off. Change nappy at the airport just before boarding and onto the plane. Especially travelling with so many relatives so he can be passed around and distracted, he'll be fine. Pack toys, snacks and change of clothes for you and him in the carryon in case of incident. It's only a couple of hours flight to Spain, your ds is being ridiculous.

He obviously hopes to get out of this holiday on a ill-considered pretext.

Is this serious? Not fly until he’s 5??

I’ve travelled extensively with my daughter since she was 3 months old, it’s never a problem! Flying is an exciting adventure, as is visiting new countries!

I’m wondering whether this is a genuine post!

He should have chosen climate change as his excuse instead.

I’ve been on four flights in the last three weeks with my 16 month old and never once did he get upset or seem to suffer in any way. What a bizarre thing to say - your OH clearly has some other issue going on.

My dd flew to the US at 8 months (on a plane, obviously. She didn't just get up and fly...) and was absolutely fine both ways. Not sure she even noticed the cabin pressure change and slept most of the way

According to your DH I've abused all of my babies every few months since they were 5 months old! Ridiculous

I was very abusive too! MIL had an apartment in Spain and we flew out there quite often when mine were babies.

Never a problem.

Your dh is so ignorant that its embarrassing. Please dont repeat his reasons in real life to anyone. This has to be the stupidest thing I've read in a long time.

He is being silly as everyone has pointed out. Does he not what to go? Is he this over controlling in general ? I wouldn't let him start this nonsense.

Christ. What a nutter. I think there is definitely more to this than the baby.

Our pfb (and only ever) DC will be flying at 4-6 weeks on a 10+ hour journey. I flew from a tiny age. I love flying. A fruit lolly/bottle/breast feed/dummy is what's needed to prevent earache.

Sorry but I laughed out loud at abusive! My first daughter literally went around the world twice before her first birthday, including on what was then the world's longest flight (17 hours). And he's worried about a shorthaul trip to Spain Sorry, he's nuts.

I used to fly with babies and kids every week for work and since with my own ds since he was 4 months and he's been at least 3 times a month for the last five years.

He's talking absolute shite.

DS has never once had an issue.

Of the other 50+ babies and kids I flew with a couple squeaked a bit when they were around 2-4 years old but not even cried.

Your DH is batshit.
Is he always such a misery?

Let the toddler suck on a bottle or a lollipop for take off and descent.

I have taken babies and toddlers on transAtlantic and internal US flights. All they need is something to suck on.

😂😂😂 Said like someone, who has no idea what it is to parent a 5 yo. My dd is 10. She used to be fine flying. Pressure changes were a easily dealt with. Now she’s a very anxious traveller due to falling ill on a plane a few years ago. As a result she now gets pretty anxious at take off and landing and as a result finds the pressure changes very frightening.

Just leaving a small list of things parents obviously shouldn’t do to their babies as they don’t understand and can get very upset. My dd objected to all of these at first :

• swimming
• giving her a bath
• hair washing (this was as a young toddler and went on for a long time it was horrible)
• sleeping alone
• tooth brushing

-......

Gosh a lot of child abuse there.

Ring your doctor and ask him or her to speak to him.

I've also done multiple trips to Asia OP and every single flight I've ever been on has plenty of babies. He must have seen them? He sounds batshit.

For the vast majority of kids there is no problem and it's not at all abusive. For a small number of infants/children no matter how much they suck etc on change of pressure they will be in excruciating pain and will scream and everyone will shrug them off and think it's not that bad (when it really is). The problem is you don't know which camp your child will be in. Odds dictate they will be absolutely fine but you never know.

I have known a couple of kids who have very real issues in this regard and why their parents insist on travelling with them beats me (and that's coming from someone who lives on a whopping big island where plane is really the only way to escape ). Even when made aware of the absolute pain the child genuinely endures they will look at you and ask for pain meds as if that will solve the situation .

They just need something to eat / drink and their ears equalise . I was on a plane the other day - there were about 20 little kids on there too, all going somewhere for Easter. From tiny babies to toddlers . They all survived perfectly well . Yours will be fine.

Kids fly all the time.

He's making excuses because he doesn't want to go, for some reason.

has he ever flown? I guess he may scared of flying and doesn't want to admit it. fear of flying isn't that uncommon.

My children, 5 and under (down to a baby), have been on 23 flights. Zero ear complaints. He’s being ridiculous.