How to let him down?

[MollyPolli]

I'm on my third date with a man who is clingy. Please read my previous post for context. He has spent a fortune bringing me to the seaside and is still being clingy and I really need to tell him its not going anywhere but how?!?! I have found out today he can't get his penis erect so sex is very hard too. He will be devastated when I tell him, but how? I know its really early days but I'm staying in same hotel as him tonight so don't want him murdering me in my sleep.

EleanorOalike
Wow, i suppose its because im the opposite and it takes a LONG time for me to trust people.

My attitude towards men and relationships is pretty fucked up tbh.

For goodness sake, this is ridiculous. I'm sorry OP but it really seems like you're creating drama over nothing because you like it.

You need to be careful - this guy sounds harmless enough but when you seek out dangerous/exciting situations like this the guy isn't always going to be harmless. You're putting yourself at unnecessary risk just for the sake of attention, it's really not worth it.

My attitude towards men and relationships is pretty fucked up tbh.

Yes, that’s pretty obvious. Sorry to be harsh but if you realise this then why not go and get some professional assistance in this regard so when you do move forward with a relationship it’s healthy and has real potential as opposed to a series of ill-advised dysfunctional attempts?

Yep, what HoppingPavlova said. If you know, then do something about it. Then date when your boundaries are healthier.

This doesn't make sense.
You wrote that he said he loved you on the second date and you were creeped out.
Then he was chill when you spent time with him on Saturday after you told him to dial it back.
So he demonstrated that he was chill by persuading you to go away with him? He basically talked you into doing something you didn't want to do? How is that chill?
Am I missing something?

The Opera "Carmen" was like this. He was clingy. She started to despise him. She ended up dead...…….

@CoolCatKat I’m the exact same, I take things extremely slowly.

OP, I think it would be a good idea to look at why your attitude to men is so fucked up, in your own words. Mine is too a bit but I’m concerned that you are actually endangering yourself. Have you sought any talking therapy? Relate do singles counselling as well as couples counselling or your local Women’s Centre may offer some free help, group sessions etc. The website and podcast Baggage Reclaim is very good for some free content you can work through in your own time.

I strongly recommend you do the Freedom Programme too.

Please stay safe!

Sounds like something I would end up doing.

It doesn’t sound like you’re emotionally or sexually right for each other, I would just get a cab home and be done with it.

I get the feeling that OP is so desperate to start a family, she'll choose any bloke, so long as he can get it up.

Or just attention seeking 😴