To wonder what exactly middle class and upper class Mums do to be skinny

[Humpy84]

I am a Mum of a two year old turning three July. Not an age that he can be packed up for long walks in buggy.

I have gained weight and feeling overwhelmed by everything.

I have noticed and I think it is obvious that middle and upper class Mums tend to be slimmer.

I want to know if you identify this and if so what is your weekly shopping routine, meal plan, how do you exercise with or without toddler/s, tips and tricks etc, diet plans, etc etc.

It is a lot to do with class and income. The Health Survey for England collates health outcomes against a variety of parameters and there’s a clear link between obesity land lower incomes, especially in women.
I'm shocked that more people are morbidly obese than are underweight, I didn't know obesity rates had got this bad.

You need to have a serious chat with your DH OP. Your well-being is central to that of the household so don’t feel guilty about shifting some priorities in your favour. At the very least your DH needs to take it in turns with you to have exercise time. Then if you are saving on nursery fees, can’t you use the cash towards a childminder so you can exercise and pick up your studies. Start putting your needs first and life will improve for everyone.

I’m fortunate to have an income that permits a £110 gym membership (£220 for me and DH) and it is full of wealthy adults (approx 30-60) with a keen interest in wellness. In the morning, following two hours of intense exercise they/we have a green juice for breakfast (£5) and I’m the evening you can pick up a low cal broccoli salad for £12- I see parents and a teenage child do this (£36!) on a regular basis for convenience. I see MNs on here feeding a family for less for a week.

DH and I snack on prawns or mussels (low fat, high protein) if we’re needing calories between workouts, but this is obviously a costly way of living.

You'll get a lot of stick for the class comment but I understand where you're coming from.

The skinny yummy mummies I've come across are middle class and they're skinny because they either work all hours and don't have time to eat or they're SAHM who go out jogging every day with their RR prams.... I've seen them, the village I used to live in was full of them, all designer labels and liquid lunches.

For the rest of mere mortals it's guilt fuelled diets and exercise classes.

I was at my heaviest when DD was that age - I was either at work or with her. Once she started school and I had a couple of days a wk I started exercising - dvds, bike rides, fast hilly walks (short) and consciously ate lunches based on veggies, also cut down on sugar in tea gradually. Between them they worked.

Well, in my case, nothing to do with class. I eat nutritional meals. Have my main meal at lunchtime, drink 2l water a day, don't drink alcohol, don't smoke, don't eat meat. I know it sounds quite strict to some, but it's become a way of life, for years.

Basically it’s healthy eating and active lifestyle start with portion control and look at slimming world alternatives to your favourite meals like we make our own burgers always have and we used to just get any mince but now we go for 5% or less fat and make our own chips with fry lite it’s so healthy and still feel like you’re having a treat! Usually if you spend time with thin adults though you will find they have smaller portions and less snacking through out the day barely any treats and that kind of thing too! Plus they may play sport for a few hours a week too! Lunch is usually soup or salad something light and healthy! That’s basically it really :)

1. Genes - likelihood is parents were also affluent (cycle)
2. Diet - I am a doctor, and sadly there is a class divide in terms of diet, both what is eaten and level of nutritional understanding. Fruit/veg/nice whole grain bread/nuts etc are costly
3. Exercise - no real insight on this but must be a factor
4. ?? Greater peer pressure to be thin

I know well off women who are skinny. They exercise and don't eat cr*p.
They'll skip the cake, chocolate, biscuits etc.
Iron wills.
Unlike me.

"I'm shocked that more people are morbidly obese than are underweight, I didn't know obesity rates had got this bad."

Where've you been? Haven't you heard about this country's obesity problem?

"Gwenhwyfar glad you agree but from what I've seen on MN you (and I) are very much in the minority on that."

Bronwen, some threads attract the deniers, people who argue that BMI is rubbish because it doesn't work for rugby players, etc., but this thread has mainly been absent of that and quite serious.

"but humans have a natural tendency to like sugary and fatty foods and it's difficult to fight against that

Not humans in general - some people."

Scientists say humans in general.
I do accept that people who are brought up with healthier food have less of this tendency and possibly also that you can re-train yourself.
I'm not saying this is the best article on the subject, just the first one I found: www.cleveland.com/fightingfat/2010/04/humans_are_genetically_hard-wired_to_prefer_fat_and_sugar.html

" I find it incredible that even so-called diet and healthy eating threads have snacks as an essential part of the diet."

Those snacks are not compulsory though - they're there for those people who are so used to snacking that they couldn't do without them.

lettuce and gym

"I think this may be true nowadays but certainly hasn't always been the case. Looking at photographs and knowing people who were very working class in family past, not a single one of them was overweight the only people who were slightly bigger were from a higher class and income bracket and they wouldn't be described as fat by today's standards."

Well, of course. This is obvious. When food was expensive, it was mainly rich people who were fat e.g. Henry VIII. It's still the case in developing countries where Macdonalds etc. are a sign of status.

OP have you thought of buying a cross-trainer on e-Bay? We got one last year for £180 that retails at £750. There are loads of 2nd hand bargains out there as most people buy one and use it about 3 times before they end up hanging their washing on it!

I stared at ours for about 6 weeks before I set foot on it, but now do a 30 minute pre-programmed session on it every other day. I love it and have now given up a £70 p/m yoga club. Spotify helps with it!

If you're struggling with time this could really work for you.

@Gwenhwyfar It was also desirable for women to be plump as it was a sign of fertility and womanhood.

High calorie food used to be expensive (butter,sugar,chocolate etc) now you could buy a meal from Iceland for £2 containing 3000 calories... whereas a wheatgrass shot would be £5 --- health food is big business!

I haven’t RTFT so shoot me!

I’m a middle class slim (not skinny) mum. I’ve developed an eating disorder to stay at size 8 though, so I wouldn’t recommend this method! Please don’t assume it comes easy to others. It may look that way from the outside but many of those mums will have a host of issues you know nothing about. Don’t assume the grass is greener. I fight my demons every day. I’m not saying feeling fat and frumpy compared to your peers is fine, quite the contrary. I’ve been there and it sucks! But don’t assume the “skinny” people are that way naturally. I’m not! It dominates every waking moment of my life and I wish I cared less!! Pathetic really. X

Scientists say humans in general.

You mean some some scientists hold that theory. But if you look around there are plenty of people who don’t like either kind of food.

And in terms of survival they just makes people fat and ill thus less able to run away from woolly mammoths.

"You mean some some scientists hold that theory. But if you look around there are plenty of people who don’t like either kind of food.

And in terms of survival they just makes people fat and ill thus less able to run away from woolly mammoths."

Fine. You know better than the scientists.

@dairymilkmonster a healthy diet can be and often is more expensive, but it’s also a matter of 1) interest and 2) cooking skills. Many immigrant groups manage to eat healthily on a budget by for example using pulses, veg, and generally cooking from scratch.
I am a dietitian and back when I was doing general clinics ( and that was the 1990s) I was shocked at the number of persons who literally had no idea what to do with a raw vegetable or how to cook a simple meal.

Many immigrant groups manage to eat healthily on a budget by for example using pulses, veg, and generally cooking from scratch

My in-laws fall into this category- fresh, home-cooked food, everything from scratch, loads and loads of vegetables (pulses, lentils, the lot). Generally non-drinkers.
Every single one of the adults - that's about 40 of them - is obese. One or two maybe borderline with the overweight category but I may be being generous, as our general perception of normal body weight/size has shifted.

"Many immigrant groups manage to eat healthily on a budget by for example using pulses, veg, and generally cooking from scratch."

Yes, they do because they come from a different culture. Class is part of culture, just like different nationalities. In this country there was a growth in processed foods in the 70s and 80s and then junk food so many parents failed to pass on cookery skills.

"My in-laws fall into this category- fresh, home-cooked food, everything from scratch, loads and loads of vegetables (pulses, lentils, the lot). Generally non-drinkers.
Every single one of the adults - that's about 40 of them - is obese. "

Wow. What do they do? Add lots of other stuff to the veg?

I agree with the poster who said this argument “encourages passivity”.

Class has nothing to do with it. Crisps and chocolate and cakes all cost money. You don’t need “posh” healthy food. Just buy standard healthy food and cook it. Add spices if bland. Can’t afford a gym membership? There are plenty of free group activities around. Or walk! That’s free. Get active with your kids! Also free.

It’s about creative thinking and taking action, neither of which are constrained by class. If you don’t control what you put into your body and how you move said body, who does?