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Original poster

Leaving a child to drink

118 replies

GrandTheftWalrus · 15/04/2019 00:02

One of my friends just admitted she leaves her 1 year old sleeping to go to the pub!

I have a 2 year old and I feel guilty at leaving her to go along to to the bin shute

Is this normal or am I right to be horrified?

OP posts:
HoppingPavlova · 15/04/2019 02:41

Is this normal or am I right to be horrified?

Sorry, but with the information you have given, why would you even feel the need to ask this? Of course it’s not normal nor acceptable.

Imknackeredzzz · 15/04/2019 02:48

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Jux · 15/04/2019 02:52

Why does she need to go to the pub at 11am so badly that she leaves her baby alone at home?

Letterkennie · 15/04/2019 03:40

Does she live above the pub and nips down for last orders whilst baby is in bed? That’s the only possible scenario I can think of where this might just be ok.

RainbowFox · 15/04/2019 04:33

How far away is the pub? Not that it matters, even if it was next door it would still be wrong.

PenelopeFlintstone · 15/04/2019 05:03

No shes alone and goes to the pub about 11pm when they are sleeping

So she goes at 11pm? What time does the pub shut out of interest? How far does she live from the pub? How long does she stay there?

Seems a funny time to go out.

happymum12345 · 15/04/2019 05:18

I expect she is a good mum, except leaving her for leaving dc alone. Does she realise how dangerous this is? I would be open & honest with her about the dangers & how she could be in a lot of trouble. It sounds like she needs support.

Rosesaredead · 15/04/2019 05:40

Omg! She's NOT a good mum. This is so obscenely cruel, irresponsible, dangerous, and stupid that it takes away from ANYTHING good that she does the rest of the time. For the sake of the child please tell your friend this is NOT okay or call social services if she won't listen. I am in shock at what I've just read! My aunts friend lost a child doing this back in the 80s (but because she had to go to work, not just go for a drink, and was a desperately poor single parent and didn't know what else to do to support her child). There was a fire and the child didn't make it. And she is held responsible for this (including by herself) because she was so irresponsible and left the baby alone. A child could choke in a matter of minutes, or hurt themselves in seconds. A child waking up and crying out for a parent who never comes and isn't even in the house would be petrified! What if there was a break in, a fire, an accident? And just to go to the PUB!!! Ahhh this has really upset me to know that a parent would do this. That poor poor child.

bellinisurge · 15/04/2019 06:21

She's not a good mum ffs

louisvootin · 15/04/2019 06:28

.

strawberrisc · 15/04/2019 06:31

That’s what I thought @Penelope. Pubs are shutting at 11pm.

Singlebutmarried · 15/04/2019 06:32

Going out at 11pm whilst the 1yo sleeps 🤔

FenellaMaxwell · 15/04/2019 06:35

What’s the point of going to the pub at closing time...? Confused

Tiredemma · 15/04/2019 06:37

She's not a good mum if she's leaving a fucking one year old BABY home alone

Hmm
FenellaVelour · 15/04/2019 06:44

Firstly, there's no minimum age to leave a child home alone, so nothing illegal has happened here.

Child neglect can be a crime in the UK.

Where I live, SS are VERY busy, very stretched. Understaffed and underfunded. I doubt they'd take this on.

I’m a social worker, previously in a front line Child Protection team which was very stretched as most are. I’d have expected this to be taken on and a full assessment done, if it were referred. It’s a major welfare concern.

HopefulAgain10 · 15/04/2019 06:46

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IShouldGoToBed · 15/04/2019 06:50

Wow!! I still haven't left my 7 year old for 5 mins in the house alone!! (Except for going in the garden to put bin out! or popping round to neighbour to collect a parcel!)

Leaving a 1 year old to go to the pub is completely crazy!!

I'm trying to think at what age I'd leave my kid to go to the pub! .... If it was the day time and I was going for lunch for some reason, then I might consider leaving a 12/13 year old for an hour or two. If it was the night time, then maybe a 15 year old would be ok? (Mine are still young so I might be a bit off with these ages, it's what I'm guessing will be appropriate then).

A 1 year old should not be left alone AT ALL!!! I didn't even leave mine in the car to pay for petrol, or on his own when I put the bin out at that age !! Can't imagine having left him at night to go out to the pub!! Shock

This is actually a prison sentence type crime ...

UCOinanOCG · 15/04/2019 06:51

I am a SW too and can confirm this would be taken very seriously if it was reported.

BabyDueDecember2019 · 15/04/2019 07:07
Hmm
MaybeitsMaybelline · 15/04/2019 07:13

This is horrific.

I am middle aged but my oldest friend remembers her parents doing similar. Not age 1 of course, it it was probably happening then. She remembers waking at about 7 and her brother asking where the parents were. They weren’t in the house. Eventually both chicldren fell asleep and in the morning the parents were there.

The reality is, these parents ended up alcoholics. Who does this?

KooMoo · 15/04/2019 07:15

Not ok. It’s Neglectful parenting that could cause significant harm!!!!

Fire, illness, choking, waking, abandonment, being taken, being afraid, not being responded to ... the list goes on ...

Luckylucy11 · 15/04/2019 07:20

Have you thought of speaking to her first. Reminding her it's wrong to leave her little one because anything can happen. How close a friend is she? Would she listen to you?

Morgan12 · 15/04/2019 07:22

She really shouldn't need to be reminded that this is wrong though should she?

No chances imo. Phone SS.

bellinisurge · 15/04/2019 07:24

Don't waste time reasoning with this stupid neglectful person. Report to social services.

kateandme · 15/04/2019 07:29

f*k a good mum.

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