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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Throwing away books...

165 replies

SleepingStandingUp · 12/04/2019 14:06

Collecting DC from the nursery, parents behind me discussing what they'll come out with.

One says she hopes it isn't a book, she hates it.
The friend asks if she means the weekly reading book and she clarifies no, a gift book (like they had at Christmas)
She goes on to say that she just bins them and other one comments she bags them all away (presumably to chuck or donate)

Kids got a Mr Men book at Christmas so not crap books by any stretch.

I wish i'd said something to her (like, then bloody donate it you silly woman, don't throw a decent book in the bin) but I was just so astounded. Utterly flummoxed as to why you'd resent a free book (and a nice book at that!!) and bin it rather than donate or, you know, USE it!!

AIBU to not understand her ire?

OP posts:
Alsohuman · 12/04/2019 17:25

@Bertrand, that made me laugh. I used to love Delderfield.

SenecaFalls · 12/04/2019 17:36

But I don’t get making them into sacred objects.

Same here. I have a degree in literature and I am an avid reader. These days most everything I read is on Kindle. We recently downsized and I no longer have room for lots of bookcases that contain books that no one ever picks up. I have kept a few, and have donated as many as I can, but there is a limit to what charities and other organizations can accept, even for recycling the paper. So I have thrown away a few. Do what Marie Kondo suggests and thank them for their service. It may seem silly, but it actually works for me.

Cookit · 12/04/2019 17:36

The books you get handed for babies and toddlers by health visitors and at all children’s centres I do find a bit annoying because it’s not like you can give them away to finds or to a charity shop because everyone is given them and they’re not particularly brilliant books. At his 2 year review we got given a stack of books for my son that were clearly meant for very young babies with maybe 10 words in total. They’re sitting on a book shelf because I feel guilty throwing books away.

Siameasy · 12/04/2019 17:47

I do love books and so does DD but there is a limit. I have a clear out now and then (to the charity shop of course so IWBU to just chuck them)
Also I hate Mr Men they are really clunky to read. If I find a book of hers boring to read it disappears

Siameasy · 12/04/2019 17:53

Not a fan of Julia Donaldson here either
I absolutely love to the point of obsession the old Ladybird books. Well Loved Tales. DD loves them too.

RedHatsDoNotSuitMe · 12/04/2019 17:58

I love that there were audible gasps, @BertrandRussell
That's hysterical. You were judged by the entire train!

I can't remember the title @Imadehimlikethat, but the book was by Wilbur Smith and it was AWFUL!!!! Sexist, misogynist, nasty pretending to be a thriller. oh, and a predictable ending as well. Plus, the authors about 110, and writing about pre-pubescent girls (as sexual beings)... You totally got the (utterly icky) feeling he was writing the book with one hand on the pen and the other stuffed down his trousers! I actually felt soiled reading it.

@Quintella - totally agree!

And to the Julia Donaldon haters on this thread... I absolutely LOVE Room on the Broom. Most of which i can still recite now and my DD is nearly 18!

RedHatsDoNotSuitMe · 12/04/2019 17:58

author's Blush

Ribbonsonabox · 12/04/2019 18:00

I loved the ones we got from the health visitor! I got one with black and white photos of babys in and simple words that my son loved as a baby... and my daughter is now fascinated with it too! Had that book for nearly 5 years and it was free. I think it's great they give out books.

BasiliskStare · 12/04/2019 18:10

I used to have about 5000 books - having downsized I gave as many to charity as I could - but seriously where I live they can only take so many - sone went to local school , some to friends. I am a book lover but now kindle for general reading is my friend and I have got over my "you can't bin a book" way of thinking. Paperbacks - if they aren't useful / nobody wants them - recycle them.

BertrandRussell · 12/04/2019 18:31

“I love that there were audible gasps, @BertrandRussell
That's hysterical. You were judged by the entire train!”

Well, the compartment at least- it was a while ago! We had a bottle of wine and glasses too. The other passengers must have felt they had fallen into very louche company.

BasiliskStare · 12/04/2019 18:50

@BertrandRussell Grin My son's godfather did do a similar thing on holiday once - his wife had finished her book & he was on the 2nd half so just ripped it down the spine and gave her the first half. But - books are generally for reading aren't they? ( Except a chap I knew who had some lovely bookshelves with lovely editions on them & when I asked them which were his favourites , said " I don't read them , but they look nice " Shock I can only hope you had taken some well chosen canapés into the compartment. Oh how very funny

RuggerHug · 12/04/2019 19:01

Imadehimlikethat ah now I don't need that image in my head of the unread characters! I don't bin books but that made me 'aww no!' out loud!!

Sugarhouse · 12/04/2019 19:26

This is crazy you don’t throw away books.I love it when we get free books at playgroup. My son has loads of books most of which we have been lucky enough to be given and asks for a story about a 50 times a day and he is only 20 months. It’s definitely something to be encouraged and i find it so sad some people don’t read to their children.

Shodan · 12/04/2019 19:34

Nobody reads Delderfield any more....... I do! My favourite is still To Serve Them All My Days though.

But I have to confess, I have sent quite a few books to Book Heaven. Gently, with no sign of bean juice. But only because I only read on my Kindle now. And I did laboriously go through the entire stack and purchase them on Kindle Blush

Many of them were so old and knackered through repeated rereading that I think they were glad to go...

BasiliskStare · 12/04/2019 19:35

Ah @Sugarhouse My point was not - don't read to children , not one jot , ( DS is 22 and I reckon I can still do the caterpillar "one green leaf " from memory - plus we're going on a bear hunt swishy swashy - Wynken Blynken and Nod plus he ( from later on ) can talk about Mortal Engines and and and - lots of others - my point was when you have a lot of books and little storage , where do they go ? I have donated books - given them away - but where we live the charity type shops cannot take any more Sad

TreesoftheField · 12/04/2019 19:52

Some charity shops will pulp unwanted books. They get money for it

WindsweptEgret · 12/04/2019 20:02

I'd pass it on to a charity shop, certainly wouldn't throw it out. We only keep books that we really love though. DS has a small bookcase of favorite books that he likes to reread, but we borrow most books from the library, don't feel the need to own many.

RedHatsDoNotSuitMe · 12/04/2019 20:04

If it's all right with you @BertrandRussell I prefer to think word spread and it was the entire train. With announcements being made at stations on your route.

Aaaand that you and your DH were drinking (I'm picturing swigging out of the bottle) to boot!

I can see those pursed lips and hear those tuts.

shesgrownhorns · 12/04/2019 20:08

I'm a recovering book hoarder. If you don't absolutely love and cherish it, bin it.

StealthPolarBear · 12/04/2019 20:21

Ohh this is a brilliant thread for the middle classes to compete in theit love of books and size of bookcases.
I have thrown some books away. Particularly the one that suggested to keep your relatioship on track in the period after having a baby you should give great blow jobs. Think Julia Donaldson is great, the snail and the whale is a masterpiece. I try to charity shop books where I can and was on a book swap site which folded when postage went up. I also have a small number of books I hang on to.

StealthPolarBear · 12/04/2019 20:22

However I do agree as the op describes, it was awful. At least give it a go and show some bloody gratitude

Ragwort · 12/04/2019 20:28

There are some shocking books around though, I manage a charity shop and we are inundated with huge quantities of totally unsaleable books, (as well as many lovely ones that we can sell, thank you). Today I had a load of paperbacks from the 60s (shillings and pence on the cover) which were just soft porn. Also nobody wants your OU books from the 80s Hmm.

Eliza9919 · 12/04/2019 20:34

Throwing away or damaging a book is blasphemy in our house. We have so many we could start our own library.

OneWildNightWithJBJ · 12/04/2019 20:38

I could never throw away a book! We send some of ours off on a Book Crossing journey. Haven't had any recorded as found yet, but it's good fun.

Quintella · 12/04/2019 20:42

Today I had a load of paperbacks from the 60s (shillings and pence on the cover) which were just soft porn.

Loads of collectors for that kind of kitschy thing! If your charity shop also sells on ebay you might be better off selling them as a job lot there.