Cake smash cake

[WishUponAStarBar]

DDs first birthday this month, not spending alot of money on anything because

1. I don't know anyone with babies
2. I'm saving money to get my own place as I'm staying with my mum, im a single mum, her dad pays no money.
3. She won't remember it anyway.

Just going to take her to soft play, have a birthday cake and go out for dinner, I've got her a couple of things too but nothing major as she had alot at Christmas. Anyway, ever since I saw the photo shoots of a cake smash, I've wanted to do it for DD's first birthday. It's not an expensive one, I use a photographer who's just starting out but she's still really good but at a really good price. She told me she could include a cake in the cake smash shoot but it would be an extra £30. My stepdad, after hearing this, insisted that his mum would be able to make one for free. I said I wouldn't expect it for free, I was also looking for something specific and he insisted. He asked for photos of examples and he would ask her. I found a photo, almost exactly what I wanted, the most simple design as it's going to get smashed up anyway, the main colour was right in the picture I sent, which is yellow, but I asked for a couple of red "big swirls" dotted over it to look like roses. (Not a cake maker so don't know the terms lol) I have a specific theme for the shoot, I have made props and banners to tie in and her dress is matching. My stepdad told me that she could do exactly that, no problems. She's made cakes for us before and they've all been lovely. So we all agreed it would be like that and I was planning on buying her a bunch of flowers or something as a thank you. Photoshoot is tomorrow so my mum and stepdad went to collect the cake today while i took DD out, my mum text me at half 4 saying she wasn't sure if she shoukd send me a photo or not... This made me think there was something wrong so I asked her to send it. The cake, it's nice enough but it's not what I asked. She's used pink instead of red, and there's too much pink, she's also stuck these hard icing daisies all over it. And it's too small, although that isn't such a big issue. Now I feel really bad as she's done a lovely thing, but I had an image in my head and the cake doesn't fit in. My stepdad and his mum really wanted to help out, and so I would feel bad to say it wasn't what I expected. I still intend on buying her flowers or something as she went to the effort to make the cake. I was thinking of running to the supermarket to buy a cake and some icing and piping bags etc and trying it myself, I've found a tutorial on YouTube which makes it look easy enough... WIBU to do this? Am I just being stupid? I just really wanted these photos to be good as I wanted one blown up for my wall when I get my own place and I'm worried it's not going to look right, so I thought I would at least attempt to make a cake right? Is it really hard?

And if you REALLY don't want to use the cake then say you decided it was too lovely to waste on a cake smash and invite everyone round for cake.

Asda do an actual, cake smash cake. It's hollow and full of sweets and multicoloured icing.

They also do traybakes for £5 each. Three of those stacked up would look good. And plenty of cake for mushing around.

lorraine has it perfectly. On the other hand a homemade cake won't necessarily keep very long...so might not make it to her birthday.

You can totally bake a creamy cake in no time if you still want to go cake.

I also wouldn't....but if its what you really want then...well there are certainly worse excesses in the world then wasting a cheap cake.

If use the cake you've been given. I know you're disappointed because you've got your theme and worked on decorations, but I'm sure you'll come away with photos you'll like anyway.

My ds has two sets of lovely photos with grandparents. He's just in his highchair in our kitchen. One has him covered in chocolate cake after he's eaten it. Although not in the photo, I can b remember family and friends laughing together. The other has his mouth over his iced '1' cake, with nan watching delighted. She's dead now and it's nice to have captured the moment. Both photos cost nothing, but are nice memories of his birthday celebration with family. You do it how you like OP.

Whilst I don’t really ‘get’ cake smash shoots, surely the idea is that the baby looks like they’re having fun? Looks cute with a blob of icing on their nose? Surely any cake would do for this?

If you wanted a very specific cake because it was going to be your big centrepiece. But the point here is not the cake itself - it’s the cute baby covered in it.

Of course people have photos, they take them themselves for the majority of the time. I'm sure your DD would appreciate you working towards a home for her rather than a picture and wanted food,

I don’t get the cake smash thing AT ALL but actually I don’t think YABU if this is important to you.

While I can’t personally imagine getting worked up about the colour of a cake that’s only going to get smashed, I do get the frustration of someone offering/insisting on doing a ‘nice’ thing that you were going to sort out yourself, in a certain way, and then not doing what you actually wanted but you have to go along with it anyway so that you don’t offend them. So the lovely thing you had planned for yourself instead becomes about doing something different so that you don’t upset someone else.

I’m thinking of the time that I was happily saving up for a Very Expensive Thing, of a very specific type, and then a relative insisted that they would buy me Very Expensive Thing for a big birthday. Except that they bought the wrong Thing, and I couldn’t tell them, and now I have no Thing and the one they bought me just sits unused in a corner. And I can’t bring myself to tell them because they were so proud that they bought it for me

The mums who are against cake smash are probably the same people who put their baby's feet in cold spaghetti for sensory play Nope. My DD is 23 and we didn’t do this nonsense then. Sensory play involved doing normal life stuff. They felt spaghetti when they had it for dinner.
Do people understand that the point of a "cake smash" is for the child to eat the cake? u m - really? They smash up a whole cake and eat about 3 bites. No adults or other children can have a piece. My DD covered herself I cake on her 1st birthday completely naturally and it on,y needed one slice. The rest of us could eat the rest of the cake.

The food waste with cake smashes makes the pictures look absolutely grotesque.

Does everybody have professional photos of their children? DD is 8 and we've never had a professional photo taken of her.

lovely no professional photos ever taken here and mine are all mid teens now, far too contrived and we have a professional child photographer in the family!

Please do not waste food.

YANBU to want to do those things, but you put as your number 2 point for not spending much money is trying to save! That’s why I said that.

cake smashes are disgusting what sort of message does it send to your daughter? here is your food eat nicely dont make a mess oh but its ok because mummy encouraged me to ruin a perfectly nice cake and get myself filthy stupid idea

I hate cake smashes but that isn't what your post is about.

No one is going to notice the cake doesn't match perfectly when your child is literally smashing it up, trust me.

Also, Beauty and the Beast isn't Disney, they just made a version of it. Fun fact so say you're basing it off the original.

I had to laugh at the faux innocent “does nobody have any photos of their babies? As if it was pictures of kids covered in crap or... nothing.

Ergh the thought of all that sugar is making me shake already let alone a 1 year old. Bad idea OP.

Leaving aside the cake smash issue, you are being stunningly ungrateful. Someone has taken a lot of time and effort (and some expense) to make a cake for you, probably because they feel a bit sorry for you given your difficulty circumstances, but all you are doing is moaning that the free cake isn't exactly what you had pictured in your head.
Think about that.

I usually hate people citing 'first world problems' and the like but, seriously, there are mothers watching their children die of starvation and you're wondering if you need to buy a SECOND cake for your 1-year-old to throw around? Jesus wept.

Yes but if you "do" a cake smash, you don't give them an entire normal sized cake. The birthday cake comes with a muffin-sized "smash cake" or you take out a slice for the child.

I don’t get cake smash either. Wouldn’t you get the same effect if you just gave a slice of the birthday cake to your 1 yr old and just let them get on with it?
Then everyone else can have cake too.

Use the cake and get a B&W photo for your wall then the color scheme won’t matter

What's the point in a cake smash? just out of curiousity..not trying to critisize. Is it supposed to bring good luck or something?

We all have our ways so good luck x

I don't see what's cute about photos of kids covered in chewed up food full stop. Makes me gip. Even my own! (Which is a shame as they are grubby little buggers and yes I did let them get messy I just didn't want a photo of spit and spaghetti !) But each to their own.

OP you absolutely do not need to justify going out to soft play and for a meal with your DD. Just because she is young and won't remember it doesn't mean you can spend time together. Go and enjoy your day.

I personally don't like cake smashes either. I've beautiful photos from one of my children's first birthdays which I think are timeless unlike cake smash type ones which are in trend just now. I think in years to come you might prefer a non cake smash one

I have no opinion about getting another cake, but wanted to say I hope you have a fantastic day celebrating your dds birthday, and do what you want to do. You’ve survived the first, sleepless, year, and as a single mother which I would have found bloody hard, and you should celebrate. I never understand people trying to guilt you for spending money on a nice day, or because you like something they don’t, and trying to put ops down like that.