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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to think I can't be the only parent who....

76 replies

thatsnotwhatitsusedfor · 05/04/2019 13:47

...can't remember their child's first word?!

DD (5) asked me yesterday (no idea where the question came from or what prompted it) and I honestly could not remember.

I panicked, told her it was 'Dada' and have racked my brains ever since but honestly cannot remember this milestone. This has also made me realise I can't remember DD2's either, who is 11 months younger than DD1 (yes, bit of a surprise).

But, anyway, I mentioned this to a friends this morning who has a DD of the same age and she was, frankly, horrified and said she couldn't believe anyone would forget such a thing. Now I feel dreadful!

AIBU for thinking surely I can't be the only one who can't remember this?? From memory there was a long period of general babbling and then a smattering of words.... friend implied I should have a very, very, clear recollection of this momentous occasion and that I was weird for not.

Am I dreadful?

PS. I have one of those baby books for each of them which I have checked, and seems I abandoned writing anything in at all after about three weeks......

OP posts:

Yokohamajojo · 05/04/2019 13:48

Nope! Can't remember either and they were both late speakers!

buckeejit · 05/04/2019 13:48

No idea.ds said the noise 'ghee' a lot so told him this was his!

Beamur · 05/04/2019 13:50

DH can't remember their birthdays!

BlueMerchant · 05/04/2019 13:50

I can't remember either. The babbling stage where you think you hear certain words kind of merges into them babbling a bit clearer and you understand them more etc.
My children never came out with a clear first word I don't think!

Badwifey · 05/04/2019 13:53

I've an awful memory of when my dd was young. I was massively sleep deprived and remember very few of her milestones. It makes me feel like shit too cos she's an only! I tried to write a diary as I remembered stuff but couldn't get the time.

Georgiemcgeorgeface · 05/04/2019 13:53

You're not BU I haven't got a clue either!

IncrediblySadToo · 05/04/2019 13:54

They babble so much it’s mostly very difficult to remember what their first ‘real’ word was. By ‘real’ I mean intentional and correct. Dada for both of yours sounds perfect 😉

Toooldtocareanymore · 05/04/2019 13:55

I can remember my firsts, but nope second fella no idea, no idea what age when he crawled or walked either

KirrinIsland5 · 05/04/2019 13:56

Can’t remember either of mine. Or when they first sat up/crawled/walked. In fact I’ve got very few memories pf them as babies. I put it down to sleep deprivation xx

recrudescence · 05/04/2019 13:58

Stick to the ‘dada’ answer for both of them if necessary. If you’ve got to lie, keep it simple.

Di11y · 05/04/2019 13:58

can't remember dd1 but dd2 said egg. would have thought it was fluke but it was while she was watching her sis and cousins doing an Easter egg hunt with lots of mention of eggs.

couldn't tell you if she was already saying mama and dada though...

Breathingfire · 05/04/2019 14:01

Dd1 said the dogs name first. I can also remember the first babble/coo noise she made when trying to communicate at however many weeks old. She's 4 now. DD2 is 10m and I cant remember her first babble noise

Moanymoaner123 · 05/04/2019 14:04

I can't remember any of that stuff, and DD is only 2. I was so so sleep deprived and doing it alone due to crap ex DP, I was barely functioning so I'm not going to feel guilty about it.

Cornettoninja · 05/04/2019 14:06

I’m pretty certain dd said oh dear (all as one word) but couldn’t tell you when exactly, rough estimate at best.

I feel a bit shit really because her aunt showed me a video on her phone where I can clearly hear her saying sit down in context (and she’s still a bossy little moo) which is dated wwwaaayyy before I would have said she spoke.

PregnantSea · 05/04/2019 14:13

Awe, OP please don't feel bad about this! You're not dreadful at all. You were busy raising two children, you probably hadn't slept properly since they were born. I'm sure you don't forget their birthdays or their favourite food or what books they like.

And dada probably was their first word, in a way. It's one of the first sounds that children make that resembles a real word. So even if they didn't know what they were saying, dada will have been said at some point very early on. So that was a safe answer

Cliveybaby · 05/04/2019 14:21

I remember asking my mum what my first word was and she couldn't remember any of ours (I'm oldest of 3).
My Ballet teacher's son's first (and only, for a while) word was "tractor" - he was obsessed!

BluishMoon · 05/04/2019 14:27

No idea with the eldest, middle child only said 4 words until he was 2, so I know it's 1 of the 4 , youngest (9m) not even babbling yet, but think I'm more likely to remember his long term as he's definitely the last

WinkysTeatowel · 05/04/2019 14:27

Nope,I can't remember, went with 'dada' it was definitely along those lines....

AnotherRubberDuck · 05/04/2019 14:28

I don't have a clue. DC are 3.5 and 2 and I have no idea what their first words were, when they walked or got their first tooth (etc).
I don't know what my first word was and, do you know, that lack of information hasn't affected my life in any way! YADNBU!

I made a conscious decision not to note any of this down as I think it gives it unnecessary importance, tbh. I hate the comparing that parents do so decided not to partake. But that does mean I don't remember any of their milestone anecdotes.

OhLookHeKickedTheBall · 05/04/2019 14:30

DC1s was Dada but I have to think really hard to remember it. DC2s I can't forget as it was Peppa Pig (well, more ebba ig) - thought I'd misheard until he said it again and oinked afterwards

StinkyHedgehog · 05/04/2019 14:31

I have three adult children, and they think it's hilarious that I can't remember all this stuff. One of them was diagnosed with Aspergers as a young adult, and I couldn't even fill in a questionnaire required about her early life and milestones reached.

Nearlythere1 · 05/04/2019 14:31

I've been told it's usually some version of "bye bye" because everybody who encounters a baby will usually get close and say "bye bye" while gesticulating with a wave. So not only is it said to them a hundred times a day but they have the action of waving to link it to.

DeathyMcDeathStarFace · 05/04/2019 14:32

Nope, cake, nope, nope.

They are in order of what I can remember of each of 4 sons first words. They all did the usual 'baba', 'dada', 'mama' etc and they morphed into 'proper' words.

I can only remember ds2 saying cake clearly as he'd done the usual, then saying things like 'gee ma' for 'green man' when crossing the road, a short form of juice for a drink etc. but then he stopped so had some speech therapy with SureStart. On his granddads birthday we were at his GPs house with some of GPs friends, granddad said something about having a cup of tea and a slice of cake and ds2 just repeated 'cake' quite clearly and loudly. Everyone heard it and it still gets mentioned every so often. After the Christmas break our SureStart helper couldn't believe the difference in his speech and Ds2 hasn't shut up since!

GregoryPeckingDuck · 05/04/2019 14:33

Where do you draw the line between poor attempts and actual speech though? I don’t think there really is a first word moment per se unless you don’t actually spend much time with your child/do make an effort to understand their babbling.

piscis · 05/04/2019 14:34

They babble so much it’s mostly very difficult to remember what their first ‘real’ word was. By ‘real’ I mean intentional and correct

Exactly

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