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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

......to think that pram naps aren’t a problem?

153 replies

Njh1986 · 04/04/2019 19:35

Interesting debate on this subject with friends today; literally divided the group in half.

Background: Our 4 month old has a serious case of FOMO and major issues sleeping where it’s light. Self settles and sleeps beautifully in her cot at night, waking only for the odd feed. Our house is south facing and has two or more full height windows in all rooms apart from bathroom. We use a blackout blind AND blackout curtains at night but can’t in the day as her room gets too hot. I spent week upon miserable week recently trying to to train her to sleep in a semi light cot, then accidentally stumbled upon the magic of a pram plus Snoozeshade and she’s napped like a dream ever since!

I think it’s brilliant; I literally pop her in, switch white noise on and cover her up and she’s out in seconds. Pram doesn’t need to be moving, no dummy etc. Means I can be out and about shopping/walking/chilling in the garden at nap time without having to be tied to the house. Also meant she napped like a dream last weekend when she stayed with the in laws.

However, a couple of friends seem VERY convinced that she should be napping in her cot. Like, practically trying to stage an intervention! When I pressed them on this, their reasoning was that it’s just what babies should be doing, she can’t nap in her stroller as a toddler etc.

AIBU to carry on with my system, thinking that it works and it’s fine? MIL keeps telling me that babies have napped in prams since prams were invented, but I’d love to hear some more recent points of view!

OP posts:
Ohyesiam · 05/04/2019 06:50

Take less notice of what people say and go by your own experience

ss2011 · 05/04/2019 06:57

My DD would ONLY nap in her cot in the quiet and dark....she was a great napper if in this environment so great if you were in all day but it made going out or travelling anywhere more difficult as she would stay awake all day and eventually get v grouchy. My DD was a terrible sleeper and would only nap in a moving process or sling....so completely the opposite problem. I would have paid money for both of them to nap daytimes in a stationary pram.....that’s so convenient! Ignore everyone that tells you otherwise and enjoy the flexibility. They all drop their naps at some point anyway so as long as you have got them sleeping ok at night in their own beds by then it does not matter at all where they slept in the daytime.....

Natsku · 05/04/2019 07:02

My oldest napped in the pram but there were a few weeks when she was a toddler that I didn't have her pram so she napped...in a wheelbarrow!

Youngest mostly naps in the cot because I don't have such good battery powered baby monitors as I did with my oldest but he'll nap in the pram (pushchair now) just fine when out

sparklytwinklyfairylights · 05/04/2019 07:04

Both of mine napped in their pram, in fact they both napped in the garden in their pram.

I'd continue to do what's working for you, just nod then ignore whey your friends give advice like this

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 05/04/2019 07:10

I'm getting nostalgic thinking about DD2s routine at that age... First nap was 9am- in pram on way to drop sister at preschool. Second at lunchtime- pram to pick sister up- sometimes. If not we would go out after lunch with balance bike,/scooter for DD1, then head to the playpark once she was asleep and I could concentrate on DD1 at the park for 30-45mins. I much preferred it to my friends routine of heading home at 12 everyday.

Jent13c · 05/04/2019 07:12

I had a baby who only slept after being fed and held to sleep and ticked by my hair on his face...trust me if it ain't broke don't fix it! Your friends are weird.

Plus your baby is 4 months old, you can easy go shopping with them sleeping happily in the pram and enjoy a nice coffee. I would have had mine sleeping in the pram even in the house because it meant I could go out if I wanted to. I had one friend who insisted on naps at home (her kid was older) but it meant that between 11-12 she was getting home to put baby down, between 12 -2 baby was sleeping and then between 2-3 getting baby up, getting to wherever she wanted to go. Sounded a bit miserable to me to be honest.

The best naps they will have is uninterrupted naps in the back garden in the pram. My friend is faroese and has always put her baby outside to sleep and he slept for hours.

SusieSusieSoo · 05/04/2019 07:19

Ds slept in his cot if we were in, in his pram if we were out (most days because we went out a lot). Now I really loved the guidance & structure suggested by a well known writer (I think we don't mention her name on mn?) but I followed some of her general principles. If you followed her religiously you'd be at home most of the time with dc in a cot and blooming bored & lonely). Enjoy the pram mine grew out of his pretty quickly but managed in pushchair fine for years :-)

DeadButDelicious · 05/04/2019 07:23

Pram naps are fine, my DD napped exclusively in her pram till she was a good 18 months, then we started doing the cot thing. It works for us and it means she can nap at her Nan's and when we're out and about. I'm going to miss that pram when it goes let me tell you. Grin

troubleswillbeoutofsight · 05/04/2019 07:26

My dd never once slept in her cot. She was a poor sleeper and if she fell asleep anywhere I didn't care

Lolly34h · 05/04/2019 07:27

My 14 month old also naps in the pushchair and sleeps peacefully and comfortably. Whatever works best for u and baby is what's important

sugartitz · 05/04/2019 07:29

I purposely never put any of mine in a cot to sleep. They pretty much slept wherever they fell asleep in the day - pram, playmat, is our them on the sofa as they got older, my arms...
I didn't want to be tied into set nap times in set places like some of my friends who could never leave the house around naptime.

Bobfossil2 · 05/04/2019 07:30

I have my dd in the pram because I’m trying to follow safer sleep guidelines of having baby napping in the same room as up to 6 months. So if I wanted her in her cot I’d also have to sit upstairs. And as if you want to be tied to the house anyway! I have had this from a few friends but I am very fortunate that dd will currently sleep at night anywhere, so I’m not going to try and fix a problem that isn’t there.

NewAccount270219 · 05/04/2019 07:36

This is one of the million parenting things where babies do what they do and people either get smug if their baby does what they think is 'right', or beat themselves up if it's 'wrong'. DS only napped in the sling until three months, then that just stopped working. Then he'd nap in the pram - we even had to buy a new one so he could go totally flat when he got too big for the carrycot because he spent so much of the day sleeping in it. Then it just suddenly, overnight at about 7 months, stopped working - he'd wake up after 20 minutes without fail so was exhausted. In hindsight it coincided with him beginning to turn himself onto his tummy to sleep at night - I think he'd try and turn over in his buggy and not being able to would wake him up. Now he naps in his cot.

People have been judgy about each stage of this, but each one has worked until it didn't. What you're doing clearly works for you (though I wouldn't take it for granted that a four month old who sleeps well at night will keep doing that...) so crack on. We'd all ideally love to have the baby who sleeps anywhere and so fits in perfectly with what we want them to do that day, but while some of them are made like that most aren't, and the parents of those ones aren't especially good or clever to have 'taught them to sleep anywhere' (as they often claim), just lucky

museumum · 05/04/2019 07:36

Mine needed no stimulation at all to nap so yes, probably the peak with a Muslim or coat over.
I’m worried about her room though I’m summer. She will need to sleep before it gets dark and after sunrise for months at the height of summer. I think you might need to work on that now. We had a gro blind as well as blackout roller blind and curtains.

HariboBrenshnio · 05/04/2019 07:42

My 5 year old still occasionally enjoys a pram nap (hops in his sisters) on long days out. Wherever your baby will nap - take it. Take the path of least resistance. Mine have cot napped and at times, brilliant but at others it's quite tying to the house. Sounds like you have best of both worlds. Enjoy!

londonrach · 05/04/2019 07:47

Dd naps in her pushchair during the day, always has. Shes closèr to me during the naps. Sleeps in her cot at night. Pretty much all her toddler friends are the same. Your friends are strange, mil is right no harm

OwlBeThere · 05/04/2019 07:50

As someone who’s child would only sleep in her cot to the point we had to cut a holiday short because she refused to sleep anywhere but HER cot....pram naps are fine Grin

Clickncollect · 05/04/2019 07:54

Yet another pram napper fan here! DS is nearly 3 so he’s not napping every day anymore but it was great when he did and it was always in the pram/buggy, even when we were at home. It wasn’t broke so i never bothered fixing it. It also meant we weren’t tied to rushing back to the house and the cot.
Really not sure why your friends are so bothered by it! It works for you and your child so ignore them and crack on.

Whatafustercluck · 05/04/2019 07:55

It's literally none of their business.

I wanted ds and dd to be able to sleep in a variety of places, so that's what I did. Your baby is still little and there's time for her to learn to settle in other places if that's what you want - it's entirely your choice.

Xmasbaby11 · 05/04/2019 07:56

Sounds good to me. Both my dds napped really well in their buggies. I always felt lucky we weren't tied to a routine and being at home. Dd2 is 5 and can still sleep anywhere. We were sorting laundry the other day on the spare bed and she curled up next to it and had a nap!

Blondebakingmumma · 05/04/2019 08:03

Do what works for you. When it’s not working, then change

JessieMcJessie · 05/04/2019 08:03

DS is 2.5 and will only nap in the pushchair. We recently changed from a big padded one to a lightweight easy fold one but he has no problems sleeping in the new one either. It’s great- at weekends we wait till nap time and go out for a nice brunch while he is snoozing!

Interestingly, when at nursery he sleeps very happily on a floor mat under a blanket.

You might find that she naps better when she gets older and more mobile as she’ll be expending more energy when awake.

Thatsashame · 05/04/2019 08:07

Mine never slept in a cot full stop. Naps or night. Sleep is sleep. As long as they are safe who cares where

ShabbyAbby · 05/04/2019 08:45

I wish my toddler would sleep in his buggy for naps. The days when he resists his nap until we get home, therefore sleeping too late and not being tired at bed time, are exhausting. No 3 will be sleeping in a pram from day dot.

MRex · 05/04/2019 09:04

The babies all change what they want for napping at various points anyway. Mine was great in the pushchair or bed, but now at a year old only does a short sleep in the pushchair and he needs to be cuddled in bed to have a long sleep. I compromise on one long nap in bed and one short nap in the pushchair out and about. I don't think it's helpful to have other mums around you who criticise you, there's more than enough of that from other randoms in life. Can you find new friends to hang out with?