Mothers day card to grandma

[Ohnonotuagain]

I was 'told off' by my mum for not sending her a card on mother's day from my child.

I've seen them in the shops but wasn't aware that sending cards to grandparents on mother's day was a thing. Or is it?

Mum does little childcare for us, maybe 2 overnights in the space of 1 year and the odd hour or two here maybe monthly so it's not as though we use her a lot. No backstory.

Who is being unreasonable?

When my DC were little they loved crafts and making cards for mothers/fathers day etc at school. So GGrandma, GM x 2 and i each got cards. Now only me left to receive one.

I think it's totally about what you want, not unreasonable to bypass sending the card at all. Quite unreasonable of the recipient to expect it.

I do send cards and gifts to the GM's because that's what I and my dh like to do 🤷‍♀️

I've seen them in the shops but wasn't aware that sending cards to grandparents on mother's day was a thing. Or is it?

Surely the fact that you’ve seen them in shops tells you exactly that it’s a thing, because they don’t sell cards people don’t buy.

You could only claim you didn’t realise it was a thing if you hadn’t seen anything relating to them, but go in any card shop and you’ll see lots of cards to grandmothers on mother’s day along with presents too.

I think it’s a nice gesture, and now you know it’s aomething she would appreciate I think you should make a note of it for next year.

Whattodoabout

It’s only a thing because the card manufacturers are trying to make it a thing. Each year they hope people will believe the hype and it will get bigger.
They also sell cards from pets should I feel guilty I didn’t send my dad one from her hamster

DD

I've been sending cards to my grandma, auntie, mum for 30 years. Now I have ds I give one to my DM off him. They all get a card and present.

I don't understand why people get sniffy about it or think it's weird, people do things differently? (I have never heard of grandparents day before a couple of years ago and won't be adding it into my "things to celebrate" rota )

It’s only a thing because the card manufacturers are trying to make it a thing. Each year they hope people will believe the hype and it will get bigger.

Marnie76 You may not want it to be, but it is a thing. I’ve managed a card shop; we didn’t need to push grandma cards because they sold really, really well.

Any type of card that is tried and doesn’t sell well is not brought back the year after, so if you’re seeing something year on year, that’s because it sells.

Mothers get cards on Mothers day not Grandmothers.

How demanding of her to expect two cards (assuming you sent her one) and be so vocal about it. Very entitled. As if you haven't enough to think about with a one year old baby....

YADNBU

We've always done it in my family, I don't think it's a recent thing. I'm almost 40 and I used to give my Grandma a card and a small gift.

My kids give to their grandparents on mother's/Father's Day.

My DP family don't do it which is fair enough.

It's just something nice to do for Grandma or Grandad if you want to. It's not a big deal!

No I wouldn't.

We do, because I did. DH thinks it's ridiculous and wouldn't do one for his mum from DD if I didn't. He says she's his mum not DD's so objects on principle. My mum got one from both of us this year because we only had time to make one. Both grandmas love it, and it's worth it for that.

I sent them to DM and MIL this year because I knew it would make them happy, I just got cheap 50p cards from B&M and let DD (2) scribble in them with her crayons. They weren’t expecting a card from her but they both loved it.

I received a card from DGD on Mother's Day. She also insisted that I get a bunch of roses, too. Its lovely. However, I don't expect one from her. She had made the card herself.There were a few years when I didn't receive a call or even a text on Mother's Day from DD1, so it is lovely that she now thinks to help DGD make a card for me. When I was a child, my DGM lived with us, so of course she received a card from me.

We have always done this and to Great Nanny too. We are a very cardy family.

I wonder if it’s more a regional thing than a family thing? I’m in the NE and everyone I know buys for grandma too.

I’m almost 40, I used to get cards and small gifts for my Nanna and now my DD gets them for my Mam.

YANBU. We send a card to MIL on Mother's Day from DS, but I wouldn't be impressed if we were told off for not doing! MIL is very involved in DS's life, and often babystis, and she's lovely so deserves all the nice things we can give her.

I have always had a card from my grandchildren but I am very involved with them - after school care etc.

I always made one for my grandma and grandpa (Father’s Day) when I was a child but I spent hours a day at their house as they took me to school and picked me up, I had breakfast there 5 times a week and dinner twice so I assume my mum got me to do one for them as a thankyou for helping so much.
We also always gave flowers to my aunt who has no children but would regularly look after us and liked to spoil us. My family is all pretty close and cards for grandparents/ flowers aunt was common across all my cousins now we’re adults we just give to our own parents

It's up to the individual what bloody card you buy and for whom.
Do it, dont do it that's up to you.
I have always bought my dgm a card since I took over from my dm doing it at about age 18. I bought my dm a nanny card since the day my DC were born. It's just what we do in our family.
Stop judging people who do things definitely in their family it's so rude.

My DS has been "sending" granny cards on Mothers' day since he was a couple of months old. I think it's a nice thing to do.

I used to send cards to my nana, she's now passed away, as I was thrilled I'd made her a great grandma and I knew it would mean a lot to her. For a couple of years or more I would send one to my MIL too then she betrayed me big time and the cards stopped instantly.

No one is really unreasonable. It would mean a lot to her so unless there is a huge back story then maybe consider it next year.

Surely the fact that you’ve seen them in shops tells youexactlythat it’s a thing, because they don’t sell cards people don’t buy

Well, no, I thought it was a thing to buy those cards if the grandma had a pivotal part in the bringing up of the child, for example, if they do the majority of childcare or perhaps take on the role of a mother for whatever reason, but in my case this isn't it. So I didn't think it was a thing for people in my circumstances and even now, having read the responses, I still don't. Like I said, if when my child is older he want a to make his grandma a card and give it to her then I will of course facilitate that but the way I see it currently is that she isn't his mother so it is a bit unusual

Sounds like my family must be amongst the minority, at least in the world of MN.

I always sent Mother’s Day cards to my Nanna’s. both died over 30 years ago so the availability of them can’t be a recent thing. Although tbf, when I was little I made the cards.

Now I have children of my own, we get them a card from them to the MIL ( my mum’s a Jehovah’s Witness who don’t celebrate).

She doesn’t provide childcare, beyond the occasional sleepover (every 6 months or so).

My 18 and 20 year old both gave a card to my DM on Mother's Day, but it was their own choice to buy them as they are very close to my DM. My DM doesn't expect it and always says "what's this for, it's Mother's Day, not Grandmother's Day", so she doesn't expect it, though I know she loves the gesture. I would never have an expectation of my DDs to do this, and YADNBU to not do it in your family.

It's personal preference isn't it.

I only buy one for my mum and I sign it from me alone, not us as a family group.